Abandon me

Stuck to the ground,

Fallen down,

Couldn’t help but just stay down.

Behind your beautiful face lives cruel.

I stayed under your dark shadow,

So dark it seemed like I never existed.

And now I am on the ground,

Where you abandoned me.

You were never satisfied even though I gave you my heart

.

I always thought when I was cold you were my shawl .

But it was just a blanket and no one at all.

I was a bright star but you took all my light leaving me dark.

I know I have to be strong but my feet won’t let me walk.

Unless and until we both talk.

I hoped it would work but now the abandoned me says that it never did.

Reviews

[Hurry]

I really like it! It directly shows the emotion that you express! I love it that way! KEEP WRITING!

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[barleygirl]

Unfortunately, most of my relationships in life have felt a lot like this & you've expressed some very relatable issues that happen between friends, lovers, and family. I like the way you mark out things that never were in the print -- very imaginative & visual. I like it when a poet expresses a message that's straightforward, but also using good metaphorical imagery thru-out to show the feelings using comparisons (shadow, shawl, bright star). This is the most outstanding line: "Behind your beautiful face lives cruel (simple but powerful).

[Urja Gokani]

everybody this is good world finds someone mean it has happened to every one thanks a lot for your kind words :)

[An owl on the moon]

The words make me ache in the lost beauty of what love once was, the dream of it, the hope of it. To abandon someone, this is so heartless and cruel.

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[who_am_i]

This is a really nice poem; the imagery is very strong.

[Urja Gokani]

Thanks !!😊

[Paul Bell]

Sometimes you wait and wait for that positive reaction. Only to find out it was never there in the first place.

[Urja Gokani]

Thanks !!!!

[Sati]

A touching one, Cherry.. I feel the poem.. Been there.. Your words made me feel what I did feel then... Beautiful expressions.. Love your work.. :-)

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[.]

A very melancholic poem.

It is a difficult thing to face; being abandoned by the one you loved and trusted; to find out that they were not the supportive rock you thought them to be.

A very emotional write. Nicely done.

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[Emily]

Love the first stanza!
Keep up the great work!!

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[Daisy]

I love the lines--"I always thought when I was cold you were my shawl .
But it was just a blanket and no one at all."

Your poetry portrays the pain and hopes so amazingly. Very well written :)

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

just a blanket and no one at all.....love that concept...

and it is hard to leave without trying to find answers...there have to be answers as to why the other leaves our heart shivering...from the cold abandonment.

j

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)