alone and confused

inspired by Edgar Allen Poe The City in the sea...

i did not grow up as other children did, 

i knew not the joys,

the laughs,

nor the games that other children knew.

no. my knowledge of life was grim, 

i knew not love,

i knew not hope,

i was alone.

unlike other children i knew of evil.

the horrors of life's evils became no longer series.

dreams of fire and of demons passing by me in nights 

entrapment.

unlike other children who bloomed in spring, i withered within.

alone i played, alone i swore to get even with those who stole my

youth.

i fought the system.

i hated those who tried to help because all i knew was the pain and rejection 

that came after the tender touch.

kisses of life meant afflictions of death.

deep within the dongens that keep me in the darkness,

bound to darkness a seed of fear and anguish grew.

in my darkest hour a flash of light came down to me,

a glimpse of true love and life passed by me.

the perfection of its strength smelled of roses and lilies.

as i began to seek this love i grew to love its sent and the taste of life

has begun to restore the ashes of the harsh reality of life.

God if you are there heal me of my diseases, take my demons and extract them.

keep me safe for i am a broken and contrite creature trapped in a  snare dying inside.

dont let them drag me back into the dugens of doom. 

the demons who await my return will surly kill me.

you raise the dead to life, can you not hold me through all of this pain?