Schindler's list comes to mind when reading this, but I have also heard of guards having pity for those they were watching over. The mind is a funny thing, it takes orders from its own guard and can be programmed to do horrible things with no feeling, or recognize a light within the most bleak darkness.
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
Indeed... I appreciate your time, Tim. Thanks for your visit.
Charlie,
I think Kipling could have said it no better.
Shot 5-times, my 185 pound father (after spending 12-months in a Philippine Japanese POW camp) returned home a 110 pound skeleton.
It took him a long time before he'd sit down and relate his experiences and atrocities, and from him was learned how some of his guards were quite human, while others were not, and while reading this, I couldn't help wondering if any of them learned anything from the American and allied prisoners they oversaw.
You're a hell of a writer, Charlie … thanks tremendously for sharing! ⁓ Richard
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
Tragic to hear such stories as this. Thank you, Richard, for sharing yours.
i agree with Marie....it is the only way to portray what you bring to this poem. the conflict of war, two opposing sides, yet empathy on both for the other.....
Ok. The first thing I want to do is commend you on your technical prowess here, outstanding structure and technique. I don't usually write this fine and structured but when I need to I employ the very same devices you do here, that is, to capture a natural tone I'll use the ten syllables or so per verse structure in order to tame my writing, give it the frame in needs to hold up my ideas and language. As for the tense at line one and two you're correct, it doesn't matter... In regards to the content of the piece, Charlie, I was swept up in the story and you give us just enough information, yet not so much as to put our imaginations to sleep...
Well done.
Diego
Posted 10 Years Ago
10 Years Ago
Thanks for that, Diego. As I read this poem today I think: "...too many prepositions! too many conju.. read moreThanks for that, Diego. As I read this poem today I think: "...too many prepositions! too many conjunctions! too much assonance!..." But then I quickly remember - "s**t. it's only practice" :)
Then again, the prepositions and conjunctions are the kind of 'fillers' that do lend to a natural tone, aren't they. Yes, I think so.
I find your reading and comments encouraging, D. Your time is appreciated.