Just In Case Tomorrow Is Make Believe

Just in case forever is make believe,
Just in case I do not have endless
tomorrows to say I love you,
I write it here today. 
I am afraid that the words will frighten you. 
What if you think that the words are meant to change what we have?
The words do not change what we have but give it a voice.
What my heart feels, it screams but is silenced by no words, no voice.
The words would be more honest than being silent and not telling.
What if something happens and one of us is gone from this world?
What if the lie of silence has stolen the truth of the words, “I love you.”?
What if things are left unsaid and you never know, that my heart is happy when I see you smile? 
What if you have never felt it when I spell, “I love you.”, on your back with the sign language alphabet?
What if you never recognize that what is felt as random touches to your back is really me writing the letters that spell my heart’s story.
What if you never hear my whispered screams when you are pleasuring my body?  My words are hushed by fear but they proclaim my heart’s content. 
They escape as whispers, because they must be spoken but must not be heard.
What would happen if you never knew that each night when I lie my head on the pillow I say, “Good night, Michael.  I love you.”. 
You are not there to hear the words but my soul requires that they be spoken.
Were you here, they would be muffled beneath the cloak of hushed tones.
In your abscence, I speak freely.
The truth in these words does not depend on whether you feel the same or speak the words in return. 
The words are true because I can no longer deny it to myself. 
I love you because I am incapable of “not” loving you for one more moment.
What if tomorrow never comes and my truth is never known?
I am more sure of my heart’s love for you than the sun’s rising tomorrow morn or it’s setting when this day is done.
The only thing that is bigger than my love is my fear that my love is not welcomed.
Just in case tomorrow is a lie and forever is make believe...I love you.

Reviews

[Bell Spalding]

I understand and love this, this is incredible and by far one of my favorite pieces about love to relate to. Thank you for publishing.

[Rain]

Your writing style is my style. Your pieces are within my grasp. This piece is an example. I loved it, because I felt it. Rain..

[Ailee Way]

this was nice. he's really lucky to have you.

[Emily B]

wow! it says so much. I think we should be freer with "I love you's". And they should be taken in the spirit they were meant. No obligation, no fear. Good write!

[BrightEyes]

a profound message here...expressing your feelings despite your fears...for who knows what tomorrow may bring? Better to live with perhaps an awkward pause or rejection...than to wonder "what if" for eternity. great write.

laura :-)

[Just me.]

wow, this is truely amazing
i can totally understand fearing saying "i love you"
Going trough the same thing,
Nice write.

[TheNewerLisa]

thanks for this poem...I especially loved "in your absence, I speak freely"...I totally understand and relate to that.

[TL Boehm]

there is both fear and great freedom in this type of honest writing. I loved this. The small thoughts like writing I love you on someones back - I've done that...
a great poem - well written. introspective. Thoughtful

[Jenny Davis]

Oh! I really liked this...It is soo beautiful, I loved every line and you are so right, if tomorrow never comes love still lives on in our souls...this is my new favorite!