She's No Longer With You

Moral: Break-ups are hard, especially when it is your fault. But life is still worth living.

You roll over in bed and open your eyes

The empty space beside you makes you realize

She’s no longer with you

You get to the sink and begin to comb your hair

And notice there’s no beautiful song in the air

Cause she’s no longer with you

 

Every time you get a break on your job

You want to call home, but instead you sob

She’s no longer with you

Now your lunch is one on your own

She’s not going to have lunch waiting at home

Cause she’s no longer with you

 

You swear at yourself, wishing you’d not yelled

Wishing you could take back the time, cause you can tell

She’s no longer with you

Why’d you fight? It was so benign

All she did was talk to a guy

And she’s no longer with you

 

Your temper was hot, and now you regret

The thing you did, and the things you said

Cause she’s no longer with you

Now you stand above the streets

People ask you not to do the deed

But she’s no longer with you

 

And because she’s no longer with you

There is no reason to live

Or is there?

Reviews

[John Phoenix Hutchinson..]

I got as far as the first two lines and scrolled down quickly! Some poems are too raw for me at moment. My heartbreak is still fresh. That shows the emotional power of poetry though doesnt it? That only two lines upset me.

I think if i had kept on reading I would of had a tear in my eye.

[Steven Cash]

aw, sorry it made you feel that way.

This is just what popped into mind and I write it down

[Steven Cash]

Thanks for being honest, and I hope you can find some healing soon

[Jolie Blossom]

hope your heart heals soon john!

[Jolie Blossom]

i really liked the repetitiveness of "shes no longer with you."
very nice poem

[Steven Cash]

Thank you much, Jolie!

[_]

Never broke up with anyone cause I never dated -_- buuuuuuuuuut still pretty damn good poem! :3

[Steven Cash]

thanks Jamillet

[Steven Cash]

Actually, Jamillet, I've never dated either. :)

[Chinchilla]

This is very good.

[Steven Cash]

Thank you much!

[That1Nerd23]

Touching.

[Steven Cash]

yea, it is

[Rhianne Ney]

can't relate with the theme but this is a good write
100/100

[Steven Cash]

I can't either. I've never had a breakup before or a gf

[Rhianne Ney]

Really?

[Steven Cash]

SERIOUSLY, never had a gf or broken up

kinda interesting that I can wririte it eh?

[Rhianne Ney]

oh? that's right you wrote a good one

[The Refined Poet]

a pretty good portrayal of the aftermath of break up. Good write.

[Steven Cash]

Thank you, man

[Geraldine]

Even though I haven't had any break ups because I haven't had any romantic relationships yet, I still could feel the sadness and regret in this piece. I can say that I have even felt the sort of pain in this. I know it's painful, based on what I've seen on my friends many times on their break ups.

I am really a sucker for repetitions and good rhyming. :D Good job on this.

[Steven Cash]

Wanna know a secret? Neither have I lol glad u liked it

[Geraldine]

really? haha yeah of course I did. :)

[Steven Cash]

Yep never had a girlfriend really

[Geraldine]

haha welcome to the club! ^^

[BIIKAY]

this is so true. touches home to the ones that have lost that special one

[Steven Cash]

yep yep, thanks for reading! :)

[Destructive Impulse]

I love the repetition of the main phrase. Also it may not be my place but I think it would be better if you start a new stanza after every "cause she's no longer with you"

[Steven Cash]

Hm... that's a great suggestion

Thanks for reading!

[Destructive Impulse]

Ok

[Ahmad Cox]

Always a reason to live

[Steven Cash]

yep yep, that's the moral man. Glad you caught it

Did you also catch that the character is on a building bout to jump?