Cry for Help

Here is something I wrote about 8 years ago... originally written to be a song back in the day but made a few adjustments to share.

Nothing but my shadow staring back at me

I walk alone down these empty streets

A child nearby asks for change

To buy his fix, what a f*****g shame

 

Down the street… a w***e for sale

Searching for love, you couldn’t tell

Sex for crack is her way of life

Life’s clock is ticking waiting for her to die

 

And no one cares enough to try

To solve these problems which suffocate life

 

A thieving bum worn to his destined domicile

Begs for forgiveness, yet lives in denial

No room for him in our over populated jails

He’s left to slowly descend into hell

 

A mother walks this forlorn street

Disappointed and crumbled in defeat

And even though she tries to hide her pain

You hear her cries bleed out in vain

 

And no one cares enough to try

To solve these problems which suffocate life

 

Destructive behavior that will never be fixed

To these evil streets you are affixed

You take everything for granted like you do

What would you do if it happened to you?

Author's Note

Please share your thoughts :)

Reviews

[Dani The Unreviewed]

It's a great write, about something we either change, or better get.used to it.
Since not everyone wants to do anything, other than point fingers, and wait for someone else to do something... I don't know what to do. let's not forget, that nothing, and no one forced these people to do what they do. (other than the prostitutes).
Whatever they go through, is just a simple consequence of their choices, and actions. Though i think we would need to help them. But then again, you, or i cannot do much on our own.

[AaronFreitas]

You make a good point... in all honesty without a boatload of money the only things we really can do is volunteer or raise awareness. It comes down to money when thinking of really wanting to make a change in someones life. I know for a distant relative... he was on the streets with a major drug problem. Homeless by consequences of choices he made. It took his family going to pick him up, financially and emotionally supporting him and getting him help that got him back on the right path. Took quite a bit of energy and time from several people just to help one. It's hard to really spark a mass change and it does suck for most of these people, once they are in this dark spot in life there isn't a way out. Appreciate your awesome review.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

you're welcome. :)

[gabrielle]

This is very relevant social commentary. I do believe that no government programs and/or support could truly help if the persons involved do not want to change themselves.

[AaronFreitas]

You are right... people have to want change in order to change. People can lend a hand to help someone get back on their feet but sometimes they choose to turn away and not take the help. Appreciate your review Gabrielle :)

[patricia]

As a song it works well. As a poem...I liked the descriptive observations. I think for me the first line sets the reader up, almost directs the way the writer would have it read. Enjoyed.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Patricia :) It was written to be a song originally then I played with it some and made a few changes. I am glad you enjoyed it :)

[I Am Svetlana]

Some things people do just in order to get by. They need to pay bills or feed their kids or themselves. It's a shame of what level we people have stooped to at times...it's so sad also to see those who go through this type of struggle. We all just gotta put our big adult underwear on and just face the day like a boss, be it good or bad, just gotta keep pushing through.

[AaronFreitas]

Life is a struggle and sometimes one thing leads to worse. I appreciate your review :)

[several thousand]

True true. Take things for granted whether here or there. Often we cant see the way out of our circumstances or imagine what it's like for people in different circumstances. Striking poetry.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Poet Face :) I appreciate your comments :)

[Amber Lily]

Wow, I really like this! It really points out that many people go through their own kind of hell. While we have our own, our neighbor has theirs, and the hooker on the corner has hers. When going through a hard time we always feel alone, and usually are. In a way its comforting to know that other people have problems too. Great work :)

[AaronFreitas]

We live in a world that is loaded with problems... I guess it's just easier to not have an emotion towards any of them even though we know they exist. It's hard to fix the world... sometimes all we can do is hold on and not add to the problems :) Thanks for your review :)

[Mara]

wow so much pain conveyed,
i love these lines

And no one cares enough to try
To solve these problems which suffocate life

A sad and touching piece, great job

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Tee :) It's an older write... the first of my old ones I've posted. :)

[Aries1984]

Sorry this took so long to review. I'm just getting back into the swing of things with writing now that I'm done with school. Anyway, this piece really reminded me of the song called Don't Laugh At Me. Check it out some time.

https://youtu.be/FVjbo8dW9c8

[AaronFreitas]

haha I once I heard the song I recognized it. I think way back in high school they used it in an anti bullying message. Fits well with that song... thank you :)

[Aries1984]

At least the school you went to used something more touching for a song to an anti bullying video. At the high school I went to here in Seattle, we were shown a video about staying away from gangs, which was one of the most worst, poorly designed and horrible acting I've ever seen. And my school was known for it's drama programs. Go figure! Oh and the song to the video was a rap song which I don't even think the words pertained to the message in the video either.

They did that because the year before I started as a Freshman, some idiot decided to go after his 15 minutes of fame by putting his finger into the barrel of a gun and then pulling the trigger. Cops were called and the moron told them that he was shot. Now if you're a student at some school and you tell the cops simply that you were shot, of course that'll get the SWAT team over and FBI and all those guys who have the media gnats right behind them screaming "School Shooting at Roosevelt High School".

[AaronFreitas]

SMH... haha thats a crazy story. Even crazier is my High School my freshman year was Roosevelt High lol just not in Seattle

[Aries1984]

I think I remember you mentioning that in another review response lol.

[SquinklaPsyOps]

You have captured your audience with poetic form and such attention to detail and tone.

This holds our attention throughout

and uses of description and plot to build suspense and interest.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you my friend :) This one is an old write... something I wanted to share back from when I was just starting to write a lot. :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree with your logic.
"Destructive behavior that will never be fixed
To these evil streets you are affixed
You take everything for granted like you do
What would you do if it happened to you?"
Life is hard for some people. Easy to fall down, hard to rise-up. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Coyote. I'm sure that most people that end up in that situation didn't see themselves in the future ever being stuck in a bad place they can't get out of. They adjust and that becomes the new normal. Thanks for your review :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree and you are welcome.

[PeaceOfMind]

This hits.
Described humans so well. Amazing work.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much PeaceOfMind :) Appreciate your review