Based on a true story... my former house and some things we went through while living there.
The year was 2012. I had been married for five years and already
the marriage was struggling. My oldest
daughter was five years old, my second daughter was three and my baby girl was
just months old. My wife and I moved to Folsom,
the town she grew up in, thinking it would make her happy to be closer to her
family. The home we were living in was a
rental on a busy street across from a local park and elementary school. Four bedrooms, two baths with a decent sized
back yard and built on land that used to be fields of fruit trees. We had only been living in the house for three
months but it never quite felt like home.
I felt unwelcome, and unworthy of living there. The house felt haunted- possessed by an evil
spirit protecting its former dwelling. Three
months into our lease is when everything started to happen.
I still remember how thick the air
felt; I could cut through it with a butter knife.Pictures would unexplainably fall over face
down and doors mysteriously slammed close. There were a few mornings when I
would wake up with scratches on my back, yet no one had nails to do the damage
that was done to me. My daughter’s nails
were all trimmed and my wife would bite hers all the way down to the skin.These scratches… different from anything we
had seen before.They were wide, deep
scratches in a pattern of severe anger ripping through my skin. They were not a
random scratch from an accidental toss in the bed… they were an evil message
sent by something demonic looming inside this house.
Outside of our master bedroom to
the left was the hallway leading to the second bedroom/office, the living room,
dining room and kitchen.To the right
were the third bedroom, extra bathroom and the washroom.Just past the washroom was the door leading into
the garage and the fourth bedroom.Something was always very creepy about that hallway.In fact, many nights we would leave the
hallway lights on just to have a better sense of feeling safe.Just walking through the hallway would give
me the chills.It felt as if eyes were
watching each step I took… slowly breathing evil out into my house.
On a stormy
Saturday night, my wife decided to take our laundry to the local Laundromat
since our washing machine had stopped working.We had several repairmen try to fix it but could not find anything wrong
with it when they evaluated it.Yet,
each time we would put a load in to wash the machine would stop and leave our
clothes soaking in dirty water.
On this night I was alone with the girls and
decided to lay them in bed with me since they were scared of the lightning and
thunder.I cannot lie, I felt a little
safer with them next to me as well.After around thirty minutes they had finally fallen asleep when I heard
a loud noise in the kitchen.I knew there
was no way my wife had come back already so I decided to call her.She answered her phone immediately and told
me that she was still at the Laundromat watching the lightning through the
stained windows as the clothes washed.
I decided to check on the noise in
the kitchen but first I grabbed my .22 caliber handgun in case there was an
intruder.I walked quietly and took
small steps while listening to see if I could hear any movement.Silence was worse than actually hearing a
noise as it left an eerie feeling.I
walked through the entryway into the kitchen to find all the cabinet doors
open.I immediately checked the sliding
glass door leading to the back yard but it was locked.I flung open the pantry door with my gun
drawn expecting to see someone jump out but there was only food.I checked each window but they were all
locked as well.The front door and
garage door were also locked meaning there was no way any intruder could have
entered my house.By this time, I have
all the lights in the house on and I slowly make my way back to the
kitchen.
As I near the kitchen I stop and
stand still.Not breathing as I sense
someone near me.I slowly turn and look
behind me but nothing.I take a few
steps into the kitchen and then it happens.I feel a freezing cold presence pass over and through me leaving me
stuck in my tracks as I can see nothing and hear nothing… yet I feel this cold
passing right through me letting me know that IT is present and at this moment
I know I have something really f*****g evil in my house.
I leave the all lights on, as I am
terrified of the unknown.I mean I
cannot shoot something I cannot see.I
almost wish it were an intruder instead. I slowly make my way back to the bedroom and
crawl into bed next to my daughters then text my wife and tell her to hurry
home.After a few minutes of silence not
counting the thunder, I hear more noise in the kitchen but this time it is
louder.I grab my gun and run to the
kitchen to find the drawers thrown open and all the silverware tossed across
the kitchen tile.I hold my gun up as if
still not fully believing that this is an evil demonic spirit and wishing I
could shoot my way out of this living nightmare.
The lights start to flicker on and
off as if I am about to lose power when all of a sudden I feel pressure and
tension in the kitchen. A kitchen chair is flung across the room shattering it
into pieces against the wall. The water
in my fish tank bubbles as if is a bowl of boiling water and I watch as my koi
fish slowly stop swimming and rise to the top dead. I stood in complete shock, as everything seems
to slowly fade away.The cold is
gone.The tense feeling, thickness of
the air returns to normal and I am left with a mess to clean up.I have no idea what I did to piss this thing
off but I got the message loud and clear, I am not welcome here!
A few nights passed with no
incidents and it seemed as if maybe everything was normal in our house.I had spent the past few nights not getting a
lot of sleep so I decided to go to bed early and catch up.I locked the doors and turned down the lights
while my wife lounged on the couch staying awake catching up on her recorded TV
shows.I had been asleep for an hour or
so when my wife woke me up sneaking in under the sheets.Two of the girls were asleep in their room
while the baby slept peacefully in our bed.I was in a deep sleep when I was awakened by whispers.I looked over and saw my wife sitting up in
the bed looking straight ahead into the hallway.It was uncannily quiet now and the first
thing I noticed was all the lights were off.We never leave the lights off at night.There are dimmers on the hallway lights so they are always left on but
turned down low when we go to sleep.
My wife continued to sit up when
she whispers to me that she heard someone talking.As she was saying these words we heard a
voice from the hallway scream out “mommy!” My wife jumped up from the bed and at the same
time the garage door was opened and slammed shut so hard it shook the walls of
the entire house.I let out a loud yell
in fear of what was happening and I grabbed my gun running toward the garage.My wife was in the hallway holding our
three-year-old daughter who was crying hysterically yet still half asleep.I stormed out the garage door expecting to
find someone who ran out of the house trying to kidnap our daughter while my
wife frantically ran to the bedroom to check on our oldest.In the room, my oldest daughter laid sound
asleep oblivious to everything that was happening.In the garage the roll-up garage doors were
shut and the door leading into the back yard was dead bolt locked from the
inside.There was no way anyone could
have run out of the house.
I went through each room, closet, and
restroom and under every bed clearing the house of an intruder.We found nothing and no one.We put the girls in our bed, made sure
everything was locked then locked our bedroom door with my family in the
room.Once we felt safe we asked our
daughter if she had opened the garage door or what she remembered.I knew damn well there was no way possible
for her to open and slam the door as hard as it was slammed.She uttered, “a little boy woke me up and
took my hand… we were walking to go outside and play in the garage.He promised that it was safe to go with him
but I was scared so I called for mommy.”It was enough to scare the life out of me.I remember feeling helpless.I checked every corner of the house, every
lock and every room, I know there was no human in the house besides my family
but was this a spirit trying to take my daughter?
Once the girls all fell asleep my
wife and I talked about what we remembered happening.Her story left me with a feeling I have never
felt before; a fear I have never felt before.She explained that a little boy awakened her at her bedside whispering
to her that our daughter needed her and that someone was trying to steal her
soul.That is when she fully woke up and
sat up in bed and called for our daughter which may be what I heard.We knew at that point that something evil
tried to steal our daughter, not a living person.
This was not the first time my
daughter had been up walking around the house at night.There had been several times where we wake up
and go look for her and she is asleep in a closet, in the living room or
another bedroom.We had awakened to see
her walking and talking to someone, we just always assumed she was sleepwalking.Now we knew there may be something more
serious going on.
The next
morning I walked outside to find my neighbor washing his car.I sparked up a conversation and brought up
the incident from the night before.My
neighbor had eight cameras all around the outside of his house since his
vehicle had been broken into the year before.He checked his cameras, which slightly overlaps into my backyard where
he could see if a person left from my garage.He found nothing at all only confirming our worst nightmare.
Later day we decided to meet with a
fortuneteller… yeah, not my typical cup of tea but I was desperate for
answers.What she had to say, or what
the cards had to say, left me speechless.She informed me that there was an evil spirit in my house that was
trying to take the soul of one of my daughters.This evil spirit is extremely possessive and has latched on to my
daughter, trying to steal her soul.The
only way to get rid of it is to have a Priest bless the house with holy water and
to have what was basically an exorcism done to the house.If we tried to move without the ritual, the
spirit could follow us now that it was attached to my daughter. Then the card reader looked at my wife and
asked if she ever lost a child.My wife
replied with a no.The card reader said
“you did lose a child, maybe a child you didn’t know you were pregnant and lost
him when he was very early into the pregnancy.Your son was the voice that woke you up and he is the one who was
protecting your daughter.” I sat watching and listening stunned and not knowing
what to say or do.
At first I didn’t believe it, but how the hell
could she make all this up without knowing what had happened?All the card reader knew at the time of
reading our cards was that my wife and I were trying to find out about some
negative energy.To read the cards and explain
what she felt was happening was horrifying.We packed up and stayed with family for a few days until we could have
things done to the house.We decided to
have our house blessed with holy water, burned candles, and had a local priest
(also a relative) say prayers in the house to rid the spirit. We knew deep down inside we were doing this
for the safety of our daughter but we knew we had to leave this house no matter
what.The important thing was that we
left and this thing did not follow us.
A few weeks passed and our house
was peaceful.We had some luck and found
a house to move into thirty minutes away.We explained to our landlords why we needed to get out of our lease and
in a strange way they agreed and allowed us to back out of the contract. We
moved a few days later and never had any more incidents with this demonic
spirit.We never had any issues at our
next house.The possessive spirit was
detached from my daughter and we were able to live safe from evil.
After a few months we passed by the
old house on the way to visit my in laws.We still got a creepy vibe just being in the presence of the evil inside
that house.We found out through a relative
that the new tenants asked to get out of their contract after three months
because the house was evil and they couldn’t take it anymore. They had several bad experiences in the house
and wanted out.We were able to get away
safe, but will they?
Nice horror story based on true events. I read the comments as well and agree it is somewhat of an account of what happened to you, but I also feel you could turn it into a wonderful thriller. Seasoned with a little dialogue it could be quite an intriguing story. Good job of writing. Thank you for sharing.
Peace, Todd
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thanks for the feedback buddy... I want to expand and write some horror stories and really just vent.. read moreThanks for the feedback buddy... I want to expand and write some horror stories and really just venture off into something creative. I need a lot of work at writing good dialogue so I need to get to work and study on it. I appreciate it very much :)
I'm not a writer of stories, just poems, so I'm not really qualified to review stories but I am a know what I like kinda guy and I like this a lot, gotta say that I'm a sucker for ghosts and things that go bump in the night anyway but this is really good Aaron, top drawer ghost story writing, worthy of publishing, you should put together a book of short stories, would be worth the effort judging from this, I loved reading it :)
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you very much Richard :) Appreciate your comments and compliments :) I am thinking about wor.. read moreThank you very much Richard :) Appreciate your comments and compliments :) I am thinking about working on some more... it's not for everyone but I am glad you enjoyed it :)
You should go the short story way. Very well written and it made me get goosebumps
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you very much Cassie... I appreciate your feedback :) I plan to work on more... maybe some fi.. read moreThank you very much Cassie... I appreciate your feedback :) I plan to work on more... maybe some fiction stuff and let me mind get creative :)
thats just amazing :) i love this story. as a fellow short story author, this is an outstanding piece of work. keep it up
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you so much Dante... want to start working on some more short stories so hopefully this is a g.. read moreThank you so much Dante... want to start working on some more short stories so hopefully this is a good start :)
Dude this was a great short story! Keep writing these broham!
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you... thought I'd take a stab at the short stories hoping to write more :)
9 Years Ago
Personally, I love writing true stories with some style of poetry. It's the best and I really enjoye.. read morePersonally, I love writing true stories with some style of poetry. It's the best and I really enjoyed this because it's so personal. It never gets better than that.
What an experience no family should go through! Reminds me of the Amittiville house of horrors. Great work!
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
You are the second one to mention the Ammityville Horrors and I know it's a movie but still haven't .. read moreYou are the second one to mention the Ammityville Horrors and I know it's a movie but still haven't got to see it. Probably need to invite a friend over and watch it tonight so I'm not scared haha... appreciate your review :)
I had been exposed to supernatural phenomenon all my life
mostly when I was a child, I believe in everything you wrote
or told,, there's an old saying be afraid of the living and not
the dead. So not true, the living can hurt you mostly physically,
And can be healed. But to be frightened by something
unexplained can scar you for life, glad u got your family
out of that place. Lets just say they were there first so
Lets give them that,, nice story body from the hidden cams
to the card readers, to moving 30 away and still be able to
drive by for a quick chill :-) thanks bro :-)
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you very much buddy :) I tried to be as detailed as I could be and I'm sure if I went back ag.. read moreThank you very much buddy :) I tried to be as detailed as I could be and I'm sure if I went back again I could improve it but I wanted to give the short story a try and challenge myself a little. It means a lot that you enjoyed it bro :)
I love stories like this and have spent hours sitting in the family kitchen listening to my parents and grandparents weave a tapestry of haunted events...this story took me right back to my childhood and there are times now when my siblings and I share these stories... some in my family can't sleep in certain rooms of this family home without a light on :)
I loved this, Aaron...you are quite the story teller!! Great job, my friend...this gave me goosebumps this morning...thanks!!!!!!
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you very much FT your words mean a lot. This is one of those stories that I've told but never.. read moreThank you very much FT your words mean a lot. This is one of those stories that I've told but never really sat and wrote it out. I wrote a really basic unedited version and River Rei helped edit and gave me some pointers. I sat down and really focused and went into much more detail and expanded on those memories. Glad you enjoyed it :)
Next up... Gettin rid of "it". Put crucifixes in the house. In places, where they are easelly seen. Put a mirror facing the front door (Some believe that evil spirits hate their own reflection) . Put some salt in a unbroken line under the door step(In some belief systems, salt represents purification...meaning evil, unpure spirits will avoid your home). Keep holy water in the house. Get your house blessed. Pray often. Phrase your own prayers. Important. Use your own words to "talk" to god. Go to your church, talk to the priest, tell him what you encountered, and ask if he can do anythin. I did all this, back when i believed in god, and honestly, it really didn't help me at all. But maybe it will help you, if i remember correctly, you still believe in god. One more thing... Don't mess with it alone! ever! don't tell it "I command you" it will just piss it off even more, and no human has authority over them. Use the name of a "Higher power" example "In the name of Jesus Christ leave me/my family/house" or somethin like that. And as soon as you can, ask for professional help. Do NOT confront it yourself. Again, i do not believe in the existance of spirits, or god...but i used to. Anyways, hope it helps. Take care.
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
We did the blessing, holy water and crucifixes. I have lived in a new house the past maybe 4 months.. read moreWe did the blessing, holy water and crucifixes. I have lived in a new house the past maybe 4 months and I've had some incidents with a lingering spirit... I keep holy water on my dresser now. Appreciate your feed back and help buddy it's not bad to see a spirit or see things move or something like that but when it gets aggressive it's an entirely different level. Appreciate your review... it's been 3 years now but I swear it feels like it happened yesterday.
9 Years Ago
Yeah, i get it... Things like this can leave a mark. Well, stay safe.
Okay. Now i need you to be honest. Did this really happen? if so...
I've done research on how to rid yourself, and/or your home from evil spirits, cuz i believed that my ever worsening nightmares are caused by some evil force. I don't know whats the thing with my case... But based on all the nonsense I've read about all the so called "real life encounters" and how they got rid of the "intruders" i'd say, that somehow the "thing" was attached to the place, maybe the house, or the land it was built on. If so, its enough to move in, and its pissed at you. Its not your house, it belongs to the "thing"... Unless you somehow exorcise it, or call someone who will. Important! if this really happened, then be extremely careful. Some people say, that it begun haunting them, after they moved out from the place. It somehow attaches itself to people instead of the house. It can take days, weeks, months, sometimes even years before you realise that it is again in your life. Sometimes, it comes back generations later. I really don't believe in all this...but if this really happened to you, then i might change my point of view. Take care my friend.
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
About 95 percent of the story is true... some of the details exaggerated a bit... such as there were.. read moreAbout 95 percent of the story is true... some of the details exaggerated a bit... such as there were scratches but not nearly as bad as I describe. There were also more incidents but I'd have to make it a novel and not a short story. We ended up having the house blessed... a bunch of different stuff until we moved out and luckily had no issues at our new house so we know it didn't follow us.
I love to write, most my work tends to be on the darker side. I write from my heart and tend not to mess with it too much. I guess sometimes I write and post without focusing on what everyone else w.. more..