Padded Walls

Something different... no not about me :)

Wrap me up... strap me up

Throw away the key

Locked in a room, I lay to spoon

With a shadow of me

      Shut them up!!!

      Tell them to stop!!!

      These voices wont cease!

Rocking on the floor, feeling like a w***e

Thoughts unwind

Bite my tongue, just for fun

Where is my mind?

Pad these walls… ignore the calls

I must be crazy

Hear the cries… my soul lies

Visions hazy

       “Just do it

       kill yourself

       do the world a favor”

I cannot lie… the voice inside

Says take my life

So I jump to fly

I fall and cry

But cannot die

So wrap me up, strap me up

Throw away the key

It’s obvious this padded room

Is the end of me,

 

 

Author's Note

Read and review please :)

Reviews

[Maja]

Woah this one's actually pretty scary but I enjoyed reading it :D I especially love the third, fourth, and the last two lines, because it gave the feeling that there's no escape not just from the padded room, but from the condition itself. Great poem and I'm glad I read it :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Maja :) I am glad you liked it. I tried to do something a little different with this write and I am glad you as a reader enjoyed :) Thank you

[gabrielle]

Very intense write, Aaron. It's very difficult to reach out to someone having emotional breakdown. I would rather let someone be in the padded room than to run the risk of having him take his own life. I do like how you presented the point of view of someone having internal struggle.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Gabrielle :) It is difficult not only to reach them but to understand where their mind is. Appreciate your review :)

[Elisa]

Wow. This makes me want to cry. The sense of being trapped, but knowing that this prison is where you belong...so deep, and so tragic. Great job with this piece.

[AaronFreitas]

It definitely is a crazy feeling... I got to observe some people in this situation and I swear it messed with my mind seeing them like that. It was crazy. Thanks for your review :)

[Jen]

Whoa! This is amazing! It truly touches the illness that is experienced. It flows and hits each stanza like a domino fall... really like this one! Excellent job.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Jen :) I am glad you liked it... appreciate your review :)

[Tom McRoberts]

There's a real bite to this poem's meter that adds heaps of tension and dynamism to the piece, great use of structure to convey feeling. I also really, really liked the shadow-spooning image. Nice one, man!

[AaronFreitas]

You are the first to mention the shadow-spooning part... that was one of my favorites. I appreciate your review Tom :)

[silent poet]

our minds are our escape, cage and freedom.. good work

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much... I was telling others in responses I got to observe some people on suicide watch and it's crazy to witness... especially when they are speaking in different demonic voices and stuff. Appreciate your review and support :)

[silent poet]

life is hard enough. I see it as circumstances beat the best of us. some can handle more of what others can not.. we are all fragile here, just some are not easily broken. you're so welcome Aaron . Anytime

[AaronFreitas]

I hear ya... I'm one that's easily broken I guess

[silent poet]

You're not alone friend! Diddo

[John Alexander McFadyen]

You capture so much emotion in this Aaron

[AaronFreitas]

Thanks John... a little different since none of it about me but I had fun with it :)

[Amber Lily]

This was fantastic! I love this dark side you have to your writing, it's my favorite kind of stuff to read. As I read it I felt like I was the one in the padded cell going crazy. An awesome almost sing songy write :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Amber... could probably be a death metal song or something haha Appreciate your review :)

[wordman]

lord i didn`t know you knew me that well,but i`m better now

[AaronFreitas]

I've been watching brotha! haha it's only temporary I know you're good now :)

[wordman]

but I````m feeling a relapse

[Chris]

Nice structural components happening here Aaron.
Exploring the dark side? seems that you brought a flash light.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much my friend :)