Sink or Swim

Every once in a while I just write in no particular format, don't edit hardly anything and post it. Just raw thoughts. These came as I was sitting on my porch thinking all alone.

If I could capture this moment... this time of my life, it would probably look something like a statue of a broken man... blunt in hand and a beer in the other staring up at passing clouds that turn to a clear night and stars wondering where do I go from here? How do I move forward with life? Right now I'm slowly deteriorating like decaying wax in a candle jar and my life is melting before my eyes. I've got to get up and do something with myself instead of wondering how to categorize these thoughts of mine. Even the small ant that slowly crawls up my leg as I write this is chasing a bigger dream than I.... the ant thinks about reaching the top as I observe and wallow in self-pity and wonder what could have been. Well.... what can become? It’s time to get up and grasp a dream and start chasing with a full head of steam. I just hope I don't hit the ground too hard when I fall... but I will get back up and keep chasing that dream because in life we sink or swim and I've already sunk to the bottom... all that's left is to lightly tread back to some familiarity.

Author's Note

Let me know your thoughts please :)

Reviews

[Luna]

I love all the imagery, it's like I'm there with you, sinking except, well it's never too deep. I haven't reached the bottom, or I have and I'm okay with it? So what if we have dreams in life, and what is next for us after we've reached our goals, Life is pointless no matter how big or small our dreams are. Sinking in the void that is left by this life we had no word in is only natural, we don't know what we are doing here, it's an endless circle, dreaming and feeling like we could fly, then losing hope and sinking to the bottom of despair, either way, it's absurd.

[AaronFreitas]

You make a great point Luna :) Sometimes you are damned at the top and damned at the bottom... I guess it becomes about finding what makes you happy as a person... and that I am still searching for. Thanks for your review :)

[Moonie]

Wow...this does sound too good to be just a diary entry! :)))
I love the metaphors you've used to make the reader realise the protagonist's current status...
Favourite line : "deteriorating like decaying wax in a candle jar"

[barleygirl]

I like the way you've shown your true heart here without editing or camouflage or explanation. It is what it is. You can't fix what you don't acknowledge, as Dr. Phil always says. We all experience these times in our lives, it's just that some people cover it over by being chronically busy -- the appearance of knowing what to do, where we're going, what it all means. The most powerful thing in this essay is observing the ant . . . very astute observations & also a nice transition as your write goes from idle pondering to a bit of a jump-start into some type of action. Sometimes reaching the bottom is a good place to be, as we feel more brave to just strike out in any direction, which is better than staying stuck on the bottom.

[RomaJ]

This is beautiful, my friend. Very moving and powerful piece. how you put life in perspective...very profound. I feel a little guilty crushing that ant, crushing his dreams...:( so sad.

I love this piece, Aaron.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Roma! This is one of my personal favorites because it just came out so honest and I read the words and remember the moment I wrote it. It was a complete self reflective write of what came to mind at that moment. I am glad you liked it :)

[RomaJ]

My personal favorite as well. I love the genuine feel of this piece. Very touching.

[Sophia]

Great write. This kind of writing is what keeps me using this platform

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Sophia :) Feels like forever since I've seen you on here! Hope you are doing well and thanks for your kind words :)

[Laura S-C]

I liked this a lot as it your words created very detailed images. What I liked most was how determined you were towards the end. Good job it is a great poem.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Laura... I haven't looked at this writing for a while but it is nice to see that someone read it and enjoyed it 5 months later still :) I appreciate your review :)

[Insight "MH"]

Nice imagery and a smooth flow, and the strength you gave to the reader while reading this gave hope of being able to stand up again after a hard fall, thank you for giving me that feeling.

Insight.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you... this was one of my just get things out... no real anything other than real thoughts :)

[Daisy]

wow very inspiring..... wonderful

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Daisy :) Glad you liked it

[Nightfeather]

How should I describe this poem of yours? Mother of creativity, for you are so gifted. I really like how you have given us insight on your live and compared it to the live of an ant. I really like your way of writing. Never stop writing, for you are someone who must share his brilliance with the world.

Good job :D

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Nightfeather :) Your compliments mean a lot... I appreciate it so much :)

[modtoddinc]

Aaron, long time.. anyway, I enjoyed the read... great stuff man. My opinion is to perhaps structure the poem differently to create more emphasis where you desire... the content and thought are spot on!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much buddy... yeah it has been a long time but I am glad to see you on here. When I wrote this I typed it into my phone then posted... left it raw. I may clean it up and take your advice and kind of make a well thought out piece. Thanks buddy :)

[modtoddinc]

ahh, the phone inspiration... know it well these days... :)

[AaronFreitas]

haha we all have them :)

[Bushra Naqshbandi]

A beautiful piece Aaron. It completely captures the hopelessness that sometimes spreads over a person. It is a heartfelt and heart touching write up. Very nicely written. The simple emotions have been expressed perfectly through amazing imagery. This is one of the best pieces I've read it till now. Great job! :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Bushra for your amazing review... I appreciate it buddy. This is one of those pieces where I had some things to get out. I didn't necessarily want to write a poem or a story or make anything up... I just wanted to spill out what I was feeling and get it out. It means a lot you enjoyed it buddy :)