I could feel it… she was standing there
watching me as I slept. Subconsciously I awoke to ask her if everything was ok
but she didn't respond. I rolled over and looked up to see her shadow... she
looked me in my eyes then walked away. Sometimes I forget I live alone but in
reality we are never really alone are we?
Hi Aaron. I am not a great fan of prose in poetry, and so very seldom read it. You have written well and it was a pleasant read, but personally, I think that format lacks punch. I did love the wording, you got it right !!! just . . . I'm into structure, not reading books, I guess, alf
I hear ya buddy... I just had to get out what happened to me when I woke up... true story lol. Than.. read moreI hear ya buddy... I just had to get out what happened to me when I woke up... true story lol. Thanks for stopping by buddy
I agree with the last line Aaron, we are never really alone. Not only that, but i enjoyed reading the short story. It was, by definition, short and in that well written.
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you Ilerah... appreciate it very much. I tried to keep it short figured most people don't wan.. read moreThank you Ilerah... appreciate it very much. I tried to keep it short figured most people don't want to read anything long anyways haha
This is interesting. It's the question that arises every time we hear a thud or a shuffle in the middle of the night or even during the day when all is silent except for the that one noise that sends a slight shiver down the length of our entire body. Of course my first thought was, "That's it?" mostly because this sort of thing interests me... but sometimes less is better and this is enough to get me thinking. It might even inspire me.
I enjoyed reading this and I'm glad I came across it. Well done :)
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Haha I have been thinking of working on the story to make it more of a story. When I wrote it I was.. read moreHaha I have been thinking of working on the story to make it more of a story. When I wrote it I wasn't sure if it was really worthy of a story or not but I wanted to just tell what happened. If I work on more I'll let you know :)
I wrote one with the same title did you ever see it? But you're right we aren't really alone we have a Spiritual world encompassed around us
Bill
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
No I'll have to check it out... send me a read request. There is definitely a spiritual world all a.. read moreNo I'll have to check it out... send me a read request. There is definitely a spiritual world all around us :) Thanks buddy
We are never alone, I love how you're simple at times with your writing . Simplicity is enough when getting out what you choose to share with others. Nice write Aaron..
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you my friend. I try to keep it simple I'm not real into the big word deceptive writes much. .. read moreThank you my friend. I try to keep it simple I'm not real into the big word deceptive writes much. Appreciate your review Silent poet :)
Great Job. Shows character as a writer and skill as a poet. Really enjoyed it.
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you very much Jessica... I may try and do more with this story and/or more with the crazy stuf.. read moreThank you very much Jessica... I may try and do more with this story and/or more with the crazy stuff that happens with spirits and stuff to me. Appreciate your review
What exactly do you mean when you say you awoke "subconsciously"?
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thats a good question lol... I was thinking the way your subconscious processes things... I'm laying.. read moreThats a good question lol... I was thinking the way your subconscious processes things... I'm laying in bed and wake up because my subconscious can feel the presence of someone and while I am looking I am asleep but my subconscious is awake processing whats going on... almost like when someone is sleep walking if any of that makes sense :)
I love to write, most my work tends to be on the darker side. I write from my heart and tend not to mess with it too much. I guess sometimes I write and post without focusing on what everyone else w.. more..