Rescue my Soul (Senryu)

Rescue my Soul (Senryu)

A Poem by AaronFreitas
"

Just some thoughts

"

God, can you hear me?

It’s Aaron… I need your help.

Please rescue my soul.

 

© 2015 AaronFreitas


Author's Note

AaronFreitas
Please review... appreciate it :)

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Featured Review

I hear this, when i close my eyes and listen i can hear a small and scared and feeble voice, tattered and worn just pleading, almost begging for some mercy.
It makes your heart sink.
It also reminds me of a child, unaware and untainted having their first lesson in life but that somehow is a darker picture than the first.

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

I mentioned in a comment this write took me back to my childhood... laying in bed praying and gettin.. read more



Reviews

"Ask and you shall receive
seek and you shall find..." I do like the use of direct and unpretentious words in here. There is always beauty in simplicity.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Thank you Gabrielle :) Appreciate you reviewing my work :)
I like this. He will speak to you, eventually. Patience.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Patience is my middle name lol... thanks my friend :)
xbxbzdvdsv

9 Years Ago

Yes, Anytime :D
It sounds so natural, it's hard to believe it's a senryu! Not to rag on senryus, but sometimes going by syllables can leave a work feeling choppy. Nice work!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Thank you sooo much Emily! I appreciate that compliment very much. It took a lot of thinking but I.. read more
WoW!!!
i have been trying to get an appointment.........do drop my name if you hear back........
loved it!!!
:)

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Thank you Pushkar! I appreciate it... if I get an answer I'll tell Him swing your way also! lol th.. read more
Pushkar Prabhat

9 Years Ago

hehe..........you are welcome!!! :) :)
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alf
Hi Aaron. Wow!! you written a beautifully moving senryu that is filled with emotion and touches the reader exactly as it should . . deep in the heart!!! Love this, love the soulful plea for help, your word choice couldn't be improved!!! Great write . . . no, better than that. . . a brilliant write, my friend!!! full of passion and angst!! alf

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Thank you very much alf.... definitely appreciate your review and kind words buddy :)
YES Aaron my Son. You called me. I hope it is important this time!!:)

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Haha good one.... :)
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~
This reads like a sincere and desperate plea. Keep your ears open for the reply :D

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Will do my friend :) Appreciate your review... it's another beautiful day in Cali btw :)
holy s**t, that was insane. It is such a short poem with so much meaning

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Thank you Isobel... I think I was reading your poem the same time you were reading mine :)
Awesome Aaron and i think the first senryu that i have read that is posed as a question! very creative and powerful too!
It tugs at my heartstrings a little so sending ya a hug my friend!
But great write :))

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Awww thanks I appreciate it... I like to do things different... like to write and get out what I nee.. read more
I believe he has you covered, Aaron!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

9 Years Ago

Thank you Kelly... appreciate the review my friend :)

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2869 Views
76 Reviews
Rating
Added on May 4, 2015
Last Updated on May 4, 2015
Tags: senryu, faith, soul

Author

AaronFreitas
AaronFreitas

CA



About
I love to write, most my work tends to be on the darker side. I write from my heart and tend not to mess with it too much. I guess sometimes I write and post without focusing on what everyone else w.. more..

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