The Evil Inside

Don't know what evil is consuming my thoughts lately

 

I feel it coming again…
Disconnecting from the world.
Crawling into my dark hole,
Pushing everyone away.
I want to be loved, yet…
Want to be alone.
Alone to sulk in my own depression…
To search for clarity in purpose.
My loneliness gets lonelier...
My sadness gets darker,
And evil takes control
Of this ill fated mind.
Why can't I pull away? 
Why can't I stay strong?
When I push these demons away 
They fight to come back!
Come back for control
To overtake my mind.
Corrupt my soul and 
Leave me hurting.
Leave me gasping for faith;
I'm searching for strength.
Desperate for my faith but
Right now the devil is on the move.
Pushing, consuming, trying
To overtake me.
Pushing my triggers…
Finding my deepest scars.
Reminding me that he
Is always here on earth with me.
Slowly digging into me.
My weakness is my emptiness.
My strength is a distant memory.
Find me... I'm lost and alone.

 

Author's Note

Let me know your thoughts

Reviews

[Rodger Tunif]

There is no one to find you. It is you who must find yourself. And when you do, you might discover there is no one there. Then, you will either despair or you will survive to MAKE yourself. One must not find themself, one must create themself. There is no devil to oppress you, there is only you. You are the devil and you are the angel. These forces of good and evil compose your being. To wrestle with the devil is to refrain your own hand. Understand and embrace yourself for everything that you are; good and evil, right and wrong. Embrace who you are. This is hope. This is faith. To hope in yourself. To have faith and believe in yourself both as you are and as you can become. Why do you cry aloud for someone else who cannot help you? YOU can help you. You define you, you are you, you control you. Don't wait to be found. Build something for us to discover.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Mr. Firtch... appreciate the words... the review... your comments. Thank you! :)

[Calamityofgin]

So which should he do French..embrace himself as he is or create himself..totally confused by this.

[Daisy]

awesome.... but you know this devil is just a hallucination just come out of it.... you will find yourself there... it;s hard but not impossible... i think i was there once i can feel it's emotions truthfully

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you for your feedback Daisy :) It's kind of a crazy situation but I am getting through it :) Appreciate your review

[A.D Edwards]

This poem made home with me as I know all too well the feelings you have expressed here, I think this poem is perfect and it sounds like something I would write, sometimes darkness consumes you and puts u in a place where you want to be alone but yet the loneliness makes it worse, sometimes you yourself don't even know how you got there, but sometimes ina twisted way you crave it, because it has become a part of you and is hard to change

[AaronFreitas]

Yeah I agree sometimes in a twisted way it's a craving because it's become a sense of normalcy. Appreciate your review buddy!

[A.D Edwards]

Indeed, and ur welcome

[Leena Madhuri]

Great write Friend! The way you put things in words is absolutely beautiful! but, dont ya worry! Remember, you are never alone until He is on your side! Keep Rocking! :) :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you for your feedback Leena :) You are right with your words :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I felt the struggle in the words.
"My weakness is my emptiness.
My strength is a distant memory.
Find me... I'm lost and alone."
Hard to see the daylight when depression overtakes us. Thank you Aaron for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Coyote.... been a rough time past few months and writing those feelings definitely helps out. Thanks for your review buddy :)

[Coyote Poetry]

My pleasure and I hope things are better.

[Destiny Dreamer]

WOW! ... Once again BRAVO!! I'm WONDER-STRUCK *-* You know very well how to play with words. Amazing write. You make the deep words deeper! :) Love it!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Dreamer :) I appreciate all your reviews... makes me feel a little special :)

[Destiny Dreamer]

Well YOU ARE! You are WELCOME!

[SquinklaPsyOps]

I like the poem.

It describes a person that was not deceived by the demons.

Because the person is aware of their intentions and being an Arch Angel is a constant battle.

And that is what happened to those demons they were not aware when they were alive in human form and they just went with the flow.

That is the reason the devil transformed them into demons when they passed away because they did not have the knowledge of their presence.

Because demons do not attack other demons and they only assault ArchAngels that have human form on earth.

And if you are being assaulted by demons is because you are an ArchAngel and is time that you are aware of it so that you know the reason why and so that they do not deceive you.

[AaronFreitas]

Very interesting... I am going to have to research more on this. I like the thoughts you provided me :) Appreciate your review my friend :)

[GreenEyedPoet]

This is so full of emotion Aaron. And though it sucks that I can relate to this, cause I wish I didn't feel this way, at least you know you're not alone in the way you feel or the things you're dealing with.
Stay strong dude, things will get better!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Ashley :) Things can only get better... sometimes I wonder when that will happen. I am glad you can relate and yes... it is nice to know I'm not alone :)

[GreenEyedPoet]

I know it's easy to wonder, but I think doing so just makes it worse. Waiting for things to get better is always the sucky part of things like this. But you just gotta remember better days are coming, it's just a matter of when. :]

[Chirag Kumar]

Excellent work Aaron. The way you have expressed your negative emotions is amazing. Awesome :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thanks buddy.... dark stuff tends to be my comfort zone :)

[D.T.]

I can feel the struggle and emotion in this piece which sort of makes it intense. You are a very good writer. Great job!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you D.T. I appreciate your kind words very much :)

[Arunima]

You are the master of your own mind...You decide for yourself ,You face the ups and downs of your life...so,buckle up..


Amazing piece...this is how we exactly feel some days...SUPERB job....
"love is what we were born with ,fear is what we learnt here.."

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much phoenix :) Someday it's fun to crawl into that dark place and write :) Appreciate your kind words my friend

[Arunima]

I'm falling in love with ur "DARK" work.....;)

[AaronFreitas]

Aww thanks my friend :) I'll have more coming soon and plenty to read already :)

[Arunima]

YEAH...:) XOXOXO

[AaronFreitas]

Look forward to your reviews :)

[Arunima]

Very soon, i promise...