Hmmm... As for the poem, i think its very well done. As for the meaning...now i'm speaking, based on personal experience... Well, i'd only write poems like this, if my relationship with someone i love would break. When someone i love...or to pick up the poem's atmosphere a little better, someone i used to love shatters my heart. Anyhow, you did great.
Sometime a effort and care isn't enough.
"Now I’m alone
I should have known
To never trust you
In my home
You failed to see
The good in me
And now you’re just
A memory "
A strong story led to a sad ending in the poetry. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote
Thank you Coyote... I appreciate your review buddy! Yeah it's a little crazy because this was one o.. read moreThank you Coyote... I appreciate your review buddy! Yeah it's a little crazy because this was one of those writes that started with the first two lines and the rest just flowed... didn't really focus on the content it was as if it wanted to come out. Thanks :)
While reading this mentally I thought "Hey, I can rap!" Haha!
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
haha sometimes it flows like that... when I wrote it I was mentally on stage with Kendrick Lamar hah.. read morehaha sometimes it flows like that... when I wrote it I was mentally on stage with Kendrick Lamar haha... thanks for the review :)
Hi Aaron. This poem doesn't just flow, it falls gently, like a waterfall that has many levels overspilling down to the next. I can feel the jagged edges of the rocks in your words, and the splashing stop start of water movement in your emotion. Raw and bitter, knowing you had been deceived, but not wanting to know. So real, so heart wrenching. Loved this for all the reasons above!!! alf
haha I read the first part and read "this poem doesn't flow..." so I thought this was a negative rev.. read morehaha I read the first part and read "this poem doesn't flow..." so I thought this was a negative review followed by kind words lol... good thing I went back and re read the first part haha. I appreciate your kind review alf.. much appreciated :)
9 Years Ago
Hi Aaron. I don't tend to give kind reviews (lol) sorry, but I do my best to give honest ones!!!
The flow was amazing Aaron it just kept me bound and ultimately led me to the world of your feelings. The structure is open and very fluid. Loved it :)
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you very much Nazia... it was fun writing it with the flow and rhymes... didn't realize how da.. read moreThank you very much Nazia... it was fun writing it with the flow and rhymes... didn't realize how dark it was when I was done haha... appreciate the review :)
Aaron, I love your openness and style of writing. Deep emotion and sincerity.Very touching, you are :)
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you very much Lynn... open and honest is what I want so I am glad you like it. I appreciate y.. read moreThank you very much Lynn... open and honest is what I want so I am glad you like it. I appreciate your review my friend :)
Wow Aaron...amazing piece...i love all the emotion.....specially the end when you make it clear how your not the problem....love it
Well done:)
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you Micky... I appreciate your comment :) The end really tied it together better than I had h.. read moreThank you Micky... I appreciate your comment :) The end really tied it together better than I had hoped. Thanks for reading
oh this is sad :( you can really feel the pain, hurt and betrayal over flowing in this! It is a fantastic piece with your usually style of raw honesty and i think one of my favourites of yours!
Posted 9 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
9 Years Ago
Thank you Serena... it was one that started with the first 2 lines and the rest just came out and fl.. read moreThank you Serena... it was one that started with the first 2 lines and the rest just came out and flowed well so I went with it... glad you liked it :)
I love to write, most my work tends to be on the darker side. I write from my heart and tend not to mess with it too much. I guess sometimes I write and post without focusing on what everyone else w.. more..