This is Good-bye

Something that came to mind earlier

I waited patiently for you

Like a child lost in the snow

With no sense of where to go

 

Yet, you never came for me

Like an abandoned puppy

Waiting patiently for a family

 

So now I fade into the night

Without a love in sight

Or the will to continue to fight

 

This is good-bye

 

Author's Note

Review and comment... thanks!

Reviews

[SammMG]

The whole defeated underlined tone of knowing the time has come for a goodbye. It can be so painful, but in the case where saying goodbye and fulling understanding that the time has come for you to part can make the impact that less painful. Very good short, poignant piece right here. Good job.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Samm... much appreciated. Kept this one short and to the point.

[....................]

When we are let down, left behind or forgotten altogether, it is easy to allow ourselves to 'fade into the night/Without a love in sight/or the will to fight' (such a painful thought) and your likening being left behind in love to a lost child and abandoned puppy strikes a chord with anyone who has found themselves in that situation. This is what true heartache looks like in its most delicate form. Great write Aaron!

[AaronFreitas]

If anyone has ever seen a puppy in a dog pound waiting for a family they will understand that term :) Thank you very much for the review... really appreciate it.

[....................]

I know how it is Aaron - I have always found my pets at an animal shelter because I believe in second chances. I'd have a farm-full if I had the space but such as it is I am limited to one. You are kindly welcome friend. - FT

[AaronFreitas]

That is awesome!

[Melinda McQueen]

Sometimes sadness peeks through out of nowhere. Filled with emotion.
A great write .

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Melinda :)

[Ana B.]

eh..... a tentative sadness and a raw sensible heart beyond all this.....love this, it flowed great!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Ana :) Sometimes the sad pieces come out of no where out of me... just kind of happens haha

[Ana B.]

well, i happen to be fond of sad poetry so keep going at it Aaron :)

[AaronFreitas]

haha you got it ;)

[ANTO]

This is a truly sensitive dare I say it, almost feminine side to your pen that I havent seen before and I really admire that versatility in you Aaron.
I like this facet of you. You should let it out more often.
Very cool my friend.
:)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much... in all honesty it started with my Youtube playing a greatest hits playlist by Slipknot... there was an instrumental part.... a very dark melodic moment and the first stanza is what I was singing to it... so I wrote it in my phone... added on to it and posted. And there is what came out of this soul today :)

[ANTO]

Wow - this was inspired by Slipknot !! Thats a marvellous contradiction. Fair play to you Aaron - The muse comes in many guises, eh, mate?

[AaronFreitas]

Yeah I am a big Corey Taylor fan... hence a lot of the darker stuff I write.

[ANTO]

Right....
cool mate...
:)

[Jamestown]

Nicely done, really good flow and wording! Sad piece but we can't always
be happy, although I sure wish we could:( Thanks for sharing and b-blessed!

[AaronFreitas]

Thanks James... weird part is I am happy but this piece still came out today haha... just trying to get into that creative state of mind I guess.

[Jamestown]

That's cool:) well you don't lack creativity, lol

[AaronFreitas]

Read what I wrote to ANTO... that is how the poem started... :)