Sweet Release

 

Circumstances

 

Weighing me

 

    D

 

      O

 

        W

 

           N

 

Heaviness

 

All around

 

 

Crying for

 

Release

 

Begging for

 

Retreat

 

 

I’ve carried this

 

Far too long

 

My strength being sapped

 

No longer strong

 

 

“Lay it down

 

  Lay it down”

 

  I hear from within

 

  Quietly and silently

 

  As the dropping of a pin

 

 

I release it gently

 

To His feet

 

At last I bask

 

In joy and in peace

 

Sweet release…

Reviews

[An Ordinary Woman]

Beautifully written, my dear and heard loud and clear. the simplest truths. This is wonderfully refreshing this morning and it lets me know that you are okay which makes me glad today.

You do this structure justice. :=) .... just sayin' .....
Love ya!

[Michael X]

id have to say this poem is pure artistry in form and was a sure pleasure, as in a feast for one's thoughts,
the sculpted form is Brilliant, i would personally liken to a statue by da vinci of works regarded
as expertly skilled in creation, the sdpiritual aspect defines your lifting of burdon, projected with
soft sense of peace and understanding wehat it takes to overcome, encouraging, uplifting, beautiful
the flower is the perfect graphic because it reminds the reader of a garden of love, absolutely heart stirring.

[Phil Askew]

"At last I bask / in joy and peace." I think you can drop the second "in." But that's my only suggestion for this poem. It's best as it is, straight from the heart. All too often we get overwhelmed by our troubles and seek that "sweet release," be it physical or spiritual. We are most fortunate that there is someone we can aleays turn to for comfort. Nice write,

Phil

[Amor-de-angel]

A very touching and beautifully penned piece. Makes me feel calm. Well done on expressing it so lovely.

[hyancynthstofeedthysoul]

I have found that release comes, when we help others. ~ When in the afterglow of religious insight I can see a way that is good for all humans as it is for me—I will know it is His way. ~ Abraham Joshua Heschel.

[Jaclyn]

Often, poems with mentions of God bore me, strike me as preachy, or just plain infuriate me. However, this was subtle, well-written, and filled with peaceful AND burdened images. Excellent! You have a great "vibe" in this piece.

[Lydia Shutter]

A beautifully written spiritual poem. If you can give your problems to a higher power, you are a fortunate individual who has a lot of faith....I usually don't care for spiritual poetry, but today I have found two I liked....maybe my tastes are changing! Good work. Lydia

[kbwright]

nicely done, loved it from start to finish!!

[Blackbirdsong]

Amen to everything you've written here. When we finally realize that we can't handle everything ourselves and take our burdens to Him, we always leave refreshed.

I've never seen that sentiment written about poetically before. Excellent work :)

[Barry S. Maltese]

I love this piece. It rings so well of "Let go - Let God", yet you phrase it so ellequently. Sometimes we just need to release our burdens. I enjoyed the moral, and the way in which you bring it about. Nice work!

[Julian]

ah yes, that moment of "Let go and let God" beautifully illustrated here! Julian :)