Along Came Charlotte

A love story that spanned two decades. Jake and Charlotte had finally connected some 20 years later and love blossomed and flourished online that threatens all that they hold dear.

Along Came Charlotte

Section 1

Charlotte is lost.  Her gaze held captive by the fiery gaze of his grey eyes.  Raw sexuality is palpable.  He was impossibly handsome.  Her eyes flicked over him noting the open necked shirt that showed his Adam’s Apple and the column of his neck hinting at his taut body.  She had dubbed him her knight in shining armour but right now he looked like a sexy gladiator.  His handsome face sculpted as her eyes trace the strong jawline upwards to the laughter lines at the corner of his eyes before finally locking with his once again.  She shivered at the look in his eyes.  She seemed to have huge butterflies in her stomach doing all sort of weird things, making her feel weak and vulnerable.  She was sitting but she knew if she tried to stand her errant knees felt suspiciously weak.  She stifled a giggle at the image of herself crumpled at Jake’s feet.  He never took his eyes off her.  He was good at doing that, staring at her, memorizing her face and every emotion that flitted across her face.  The corner of his mouth twitched and she knew he realized that she was in the throes of some crazy irrational thought.  She sighed, he could read her like a book.

Jake opened his arms and whispered, “Hi.”  Charlotte did not hesitate.  She found the strength to get up and walk into his arms snuggling closely to his taut, tense body.  He bent his head and she could feel the hotness of his breath hit her face.

“I missed you.” He said cupping her head in his hands and burying his nose in her hair.

“Hmmm, you smell good.  I want to inhale you.” He told her hoarsely burying his face into her neck.  He slides one hand down to her lower back, pulling her closer to him and she melts into him.  With his other hand he strokes her hair, the side of her face before slipping it under her chin lifting her face up to his.  Charlotte raises her hand and pulls his head down further, tangling her fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck.  She loved the feel of him.  She looks at him and her eyes travel to his lips.  Licking her lips she moves forward and presses her mouth to his.  Tentative at first, tasting and feeling, getting bolder as she feels his response.  She runs her tongue along his lower lip, teasingly, along the shape of his top lip.  Jake groaned softly before swooping and plumbing his mouth to hers, taking from her what she gave freely.  He plundered her mouth.  It was electrifying and they were shaken to their core.  Charlotte had heard that people said their first kiss was like fireworks exploding but never in her life had she experienced it until now.  She was lost in the sensation of magic.  She felt Jake shiver.  When he lifted his lips from hers, she felt bereft.  They stared at each other shaken.  Jake wanted to ravage her there and then.  He wanted to take her and do all the things he had fantasized about.  His eyes were dark with passion and Charlotte knew she would have to step back.

“Jake…” she croaked out, “we have to go.”  He looked fierce and for a moment she thought he didn’t hear her and then he nodded.  Jake was struggling to find control.  He was dangerously close to forgetting all the promises they had made.  He was close to doing the very thing they had both agreed they could not do.  Their agreement had been one kiss.  Just one kiss and he had to be content with that.  Charlotte lifted his hand to her mouth and planted a kiss in his palm and then she gently led him from the sanctity of his hotel room.  They rode the elevator in silence.  Staring at each other.  Lost in their own thoughts.

“God you are beautiful.” he finally broke the silence as the elevator came to a stop.  Sitting in the bistro style restaurant of the hotel, Charlotte could scarce believe that Jake was actually here. She openly watched him as he ordered their food.  He took her breath away and that kiss had robbed her of her sanity.  She had barely managed to keep control to remember their promise.  The last thing she wanted was for Jake’s guilt to consume him to point where he shut down from her.  All he had asked for was one kiss and she had done that.  He was an honourable man and being with her was something that they both knew was wrong and yet it was so right in their minds.  He had a family that he loved.  She knew that and she knew it was costing him dearly to spend this one day with her.

Charlotte looked around her and noticed the pristine white tablecloth adorning the table.  She swallowed hard to stop herself from giggling, her eyes wide with mischief.  Jake finished ordering looked at her quizzically following her gaze from his eyes to the tablecloth and his mouth widened in a huge smile.  They both broke out laughing uncontrollably, wiping tears from their eyes. 

They ate in silence exchanging looks that told its own story.

“You are so beautiful,” Jake said again and Charlotte blushed.

“I can’t believe you are here.  This is crazy.  Are we crazy babe? Oh my God what were we thinking?” Charlotte knew she was babbling.  Jake threw back his head and laughed.

“What’s so funny?” she asked a little miffed.

“You!” he replied, pointing his finger at her, “You are too cute.  I was wondering when you would launch into your endless questions without giving me a chance to get a word in edgeways.”  His eyes teased her, as his laughter subsides and he becomes serious.

“I am madly in love with you.” He was no longer laughing.  His intense stare sent shivers down her spine.   Charlotte wanted to reach across the table and take him in her arms, smother him with kisses and to hell with the consequences.  She did nothing of the sort.

“I love you too,” she whispers, eyes filling with tears.

“Don’t cry.  I know it’s hard but you know it has to be this way right babe?”  She nodded her head and he reached across taking her hands in his rubbing his thumbpad in the palm of her hand.  Charlotte is completely distracted by now, her love for him showing in her eyes, humbling Jake.

“What shall we do now?’ he asks casually, “We could go back to the room…..or….” he arches his eyebrows suggestively at her wickedly.  She knew he was trying to lighten the moment.

“Hmmmm,” she pretended to think, tilting her head sideways, deep in thought, “I’m not sure I should be alone with you.  You look like someone up to no good.” She says teasingly.

“Do I?” he asked innocently, the intensity of his stare belying his words. 

In the end they settled for a walk along the boardwalk enjoying the soft summer breeze wafting through the air. 

“So I was thinking you might want to see….” Charlotte proceeded to rattle off a list of places Jake might like to visit.  Jake put his hand up

“Stop, Charlotte, stop.  I don’t want to do any sight seeing.  I just want to spend the time with you.”

Charlotte is stumped.  Silenced, she turns to look at him and that was a mistake.  She all but drowned inn his eyes.  The world stopped still and there was only Jake and Charlotte.  Their eyes touching each other.  Loving each other.  Creating magic in a world where there was only the two of them.  Charlotte was rudely shaken out of her reverie as something hit her in the head.

“Ouch,” she yelped as a ball hit her on the head.

“Hey!” yelled Jake at the retreating back of a young boy. The boy turned and mouthed sorry before running off.  Jake had instinctively reached for Charlotte and she was wrapped in his arms.

“Are you ok?” he asked anxiously.

“I’m ok, honest.” She reassured him touching her head gingerly.  Her problem was not her head, it was being in Jake’s arms held close to his body when all her instinct cried to bury herself into him.

“Jake….” Squeaked Charlotte hardly believing that was her voice.  It couldn’t be hers she mused, because she was quite comfortable where she was…..but she knew she couldn’t and gently pushed against Jake’s chest to free herself.  Jake reluctantly let her go.  There was no need for words.  They both knew that they were treading on thin ice.  Jake grabbed her hands and started to walk.

Their easy camaraderie was filled with non stop chatter.  Charlotte was gobsmacked that they could speak about any and everything with Jake.  She was so comfortable with him.  Had always been.  She had shared so many personal things about her life that she had not done with anyone else.  Jake told her that he too shared things with her that he had never shared with anyone.  Not his parents.  Not his wife.  No one but he marvelled that he could tell her and he knew it was because he trusted her implicitly.  They laughed together.  Laughed at each other.  Made fun of each other.  Jake had learned how to beat her at her own game teasing her mercilessly.  Their glances were meant for each other, their own language, their own secret that only they knew.  There was something downright sexy about the surreptitiousness of their relationship.  This was their moment.  This was the only moment meant for them.  This was the moment that would have to last them both for the rest of their lives.

Charlotte’s stomach contracted painfully as she realized they had come full circle and were back in the parking lot of the hotel.  It was that time already.  No one spoke.  They walked in silence to her car.  Before they reached her car, Jake stopped and pulled her toward him.

“I can’t wait another second to do this.” He said taking her head in his hands and planting a soft kiss on her forehead before leaning his head against hers.

“I will miss you so much.  I miss you already.” Jake’s voice was hoarse and raw with emotion.  “I will always love you.”  Charlotte heart skipped a beat.  She wasn’t quite sure if her heart actually stopped in that moment. If it did, Charlotte would not have minded she told herself.

“I was so scared to come,” Jake continued, “I told myself one kiss and a hug would be enough to get me through the rest of my life.” His voice broke.

“Jake….”

“Shh Shh! No interrupting babe.  I need to get through what I want to say to you..”  He put his finger against Charlotte’s lips and she fought against her desire to take it into her mouth.

“I want to do so many things with you.  I wanted to drag you back to that room and love you, brand you with my touch but we both knew that couldn’t happen.  I want you to know that if things were different….if I had known way back then what I know now…..things would have been different and you would have been mine.  Mine, all mine.”  He wiped away a tear rolling down Charlotte’s cheek.

“I want you to remember that I love you.  I always have, and I always will, promise me.”  Charlotte nodded incapable of speaking as her tears flowed freely.  “You were my first love, you are my last love.  You will always be my princess.”

“Left ventricle?” she managed.

“Left ventricle” he affirmed patting his chest with her hand, so she could feel the wild beating of his heart.

“I love you so much Jake.  You are my heart, my soul and my life.  I don’t know how I will manage to live without you.  Always remember though,” she said pointing a finger at him, “you are someone’s favourite!” redirecting her finger to point at herself. Trying to be brave with a watery smile.

They held each other for a while longer and then Jake slowly and gently set her free.  He gave her one last long intense look before turning and walking away from her.  Charlotte watched him walk away, willing him to turn around so that she could go running to him.  He didn’t turn around until he reached the hotel door when he stopped and looked at her, lifted his hand to blow her a kiss before the hotel swallowed him up.  Charlotte pretended to catch his kiss, a loud sob escaping as her heart cracked into two pieces.

 

Section 2

Charlotte buried her head into the soft folds of her blanket groaning.  Oh God, how was she going to get through this.  How was she going to live without Jake in her life. She had no one to blame but herself.  She had walked into this thing eyes wide open.  She chose a path that could only lead to heartbreak that she was powerless to stop.  Now the day of reckoning was here and she was a mess.  Struggling.  Jake was gone.  He would not come back.  He would not contact her, she knew that.  Her heart was broken. She had all the memories they had created, sweet memories that were to soothe her soul and last her a lifetime without him.  In the cold light of day, those memories were bitter sweet.  She tried to focus on the fact that she knew Jake loved her.  She never doubted that but it was still hard knowing that she would not see his handsome face, or hear his sexy chuckle, or be able to tease him.

“Aggggh…..” she groaned loudly.  Tears streaming down her face.  She could not stop the endless flow.

“You might want to drink more water if you are going to cry so much!” she could almost hear him telling her that in his raspy husky voice.  She longed to see him just one more time, she bargained with herself, knowing that that would still not be enough.  She saw his handsome smiling face, yearning to touch it.  She saw his sad eyes as he had said goodbye to her that day. She saw the hurt reflected in them.  Her eyes fell on her cell phone.  She had spent many days waiting to hear the familiar ping.  Picking it up to make sure it was turned on or that she was connected to wi fi. Hope against hope that it would be Jake.  Yet she knew that he would not contact her.  He was strong and determined that way.  Something she loved about him but now how that hurt.  Her cell mocked her.  She, Charlotte Benson, was dependent on that tiny electronic device.  It had been her life line to Jake.  The many times she checked the blank screen for messages telling herself that she was not looking for his messages, but her heart knew she lied.  Charlotte took no comfort in knowing that Jake was suffering too.  She knew he would be struggling.  She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, threw off the blanket with a new sense of urgency and determination.  She was not going to sit there and wallow.  He would not want her to do that.

“Well who said you get a say in what I do?” she asked defiantly experiencing a sharp pain of anger.  “No, you don’t, mister.  If I want to wallow, I will.” she told the empty apartment marching into the tiny bathroom in her lonely flat.

Towelling her hair dry, a cup of coffee in front of her, Charlotte thought back to that first day when she had contacted Jake.  Why had she done that?  She was still at a loss to explain but there had been a nagging feeling that she needed him to know that she had heard about his mum and that she was thinking of him.  It had been years since she had seen Jake as their lives had taken different paths.  She had had a crush on him but he never paid her no mind.  Their lives had been entwined with mutual family and friends.  Throughout the years she had always thought of him.  He used to be close to her brother but she wasn’t sure if he still was.  She would hear about him through the thriving grapevine and had been in touch for a while with his mum.  She was sad to hear of her death.  She had wanted to contact Jake at the time she heard but couldn’t bring herself to do it.  She was oddly emotional, more so than she aught to have been.  In truth Charlotte never forgot her liking for Jake and it would thrill her in the ensuing years if she heard he had asked after her.  She never defined her feelings even though she was married, Jake was still in a part of her mind and every so often she would allow herself the pleasure of thinking of him.  It was now six months since his mum had passed and she woke up that morning with a plan to definitely contact Jake.  She had managed to get his number from his sister.  Her heart was pounding heavy in her chest as she dialled his number.

“Hello, Jake, I don’t know if you remember me. I’ve been trying to pluck up the courage to make this call for sometime now to tell you that I am so sorry about your mum.  She was a lovely lady.  Anyway, I guess you are not home, so I will try again another time…by the way, it’s a blast from the past, it’s Charlotte. Bye.”  She quickly put the phone down feeling oddly relieved and disappointed at the same time.  Blast she thought, knowing that she would not make that call again.   She marvelled at herself for making the call.  It had been so many years he probably would not even remember her, she thought.  She was the one with all the fantasy of him.  She was deep in thought when the phone rang and she automatically reached for it.

“Hello.”

“Hi, Charlotte, it’s Jake.” His voice was deep and husky.  Charlotte’s grip on the phone tightened and something strange was happening in her belly.

“Of course I remember you,” Jake continued.

 “Hi Jake,” she said feeling foolish before rushing into “I was so sorry to hear about your mum.  I thought of you and wanted to get in touch with you to let you know that.”  She was rambling as she often did when she was nervous.

“It’s ok Charlotte.” He told her huskily. “Mum didn’t suffer.  She passed peacefully.  You never get over something like that but you learn to cope.”

“I have so many good memories of her.  She used to email me but we somehow lost touch and I am really sorry for that.” Charlotte told him emotionally.

“I didn’t know that.” He said.  “How have you been?”

“I been doing ok.  Not sure if you know but I am divorced now.  Have been for about six months.  Long story short, we were young and then drifted apart.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”  Jake wondered what had happened.  He had always thought she was happily married.  He had never heard anything else.

They talked for a while about mutual friends and family whom they had lost track of.  Jake was curious about her opening comment about plucking up the courage to call him.  He thought it was odd wording so decided to ask her.

She laughed nervously, “Well it’s been quite a while since we were in touch and I wasn’t sure if you remembered me…..”

“How could I forget you Charlotte?” Jake asked mystified.  “Actually, if I am totally honest, I had a huge crush on you.” He dropped that on her without any hesitation.  He only knew that he wanted her to know.

“What!” she exclaimed. “You had a crush on me?  I can’t believe that.  You must be confusing me with my sister.  She is the one all the guys were after.”

“No.  No, it was definitely you.” Jake told her laughingly. “You don’t want to know the things I used to do just to get to see you.”

“Oh my God, you have to tell me. I can’t really believe it….but please tell me.” She asked him.

Jake told her how he would purposely go to places where he knew she would be just to see her.  He even became good friends with her brother just to get to see her.  Charlotte was stumped.

“Wow.  Why are you telling me this now?” she asked breathlessly.

“I don’t know.  I just knew that I wanted to.  I felt the urge to tell you before I leave this world.” He said simply.

There was an infinitesimal pause while Charlotte digested this information. 

“Actually since we are being honest then, I guess I should fess up that I had a crush on you too.  I was so shy but I liked you.  Strange I never once guessed that you liked me.” She told him unaware that Jake was having difficulty breathing on the other end of the phone.

“What” he managed to get out.

“Yes,” she confirmed laughing and he could hear the note of shyness that crept in her tone.  He was blown away.  She had had a crush on him too?  His mind could not grasp her confession.

“Why did you not say anything Jake.  I wanted you to notice me but you never showed any interest.” She asked him on a serious note.

“I was shy Charlotte.  Incredibly shy and to be honest I never thought you noticed me.  You were out of my league.  You were the girl that I never thought I could get.”

“Oh my God,” she said again making no attempt to mask the regret in her voice.

“I fell hard for you from the first day I saw you.  I was at your house in your kitchen eating fish and chips when you walked in the door.  Ever since that day I had this huge crush on you.  You were the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.  Everyone else paled compared to you.”

Charlotte was moved by his words and at the same time gutted.  How could she not know that Jake liked her.  Would it have made a difference, the little voice in her head asked. Hell yes it would. 

“Wow Jake, I still think you have the wrong girl.  I wish you had told me.  But then again I probably would have run away.  I was so shy.”

“That’s one of the things that I liked about you Charlotte.  You were shy.  Demure with a hint of coyness and I was drawn to you.  In fact, I shouldn’t tell you this but I can’t seem to stop myself,” Jake’s laugh was a mixture of hoarseness and embarrassment, “when I heard your voice today, all those emotions I felt that first day I saw you came rushing back.  I feel kind of stunned to be honest.  Throughout my teens my feelings for you grew and I was gutted when I heard you were getting married.  I realized then that I could never get the girl and so I had to get on with my life.”

Charlotte was shaking as she listened to Jake.  She could not believe her ears.  All those years she had yearned for him, now to realize that he had liked her too.  What cruel fate was this?  How could this be?

“Jake I never forgot you.  I always thought of you.  Wanted to know where you were and what you were doing.  I knew you were divorced and remarried. After you remarried and moved away, I was devastated.  I didn’t really put a name to what I was feeling.  I just knew that I was sad and that it mattered.  But life went on.” She told him.

Jake could not believe that Charlotte had even noticed him much less thought of him throughout the years.

“So, what happened with your marriage?  Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.  Charlotte found herself telling Jake about the sad demise of her marriage.  She told him things she had never told anyone, not even her parents.  He was so easy to talk to.  Jake felt sad and angry.  She was so beautiful.  He could not imagine anyone hurting her.  Hell, he would have protected and loved her if she were his.  It took him a while to realize where his thoughts were taking him.

“I am so sorry Charlotte.  A woman like you deserve the best.  I understand some of what you were going through as my sister is going through same thing.  Only she just can’t seem to find the courage to leave.  I would support her totally but she just won’t leave and it does anger me.”

“Jake it takes a lot of courage and strength to leave.  We were married very young and we were brought up to believe that divorce is not an option.  Its not easy to make such a decision.” She told him sadly.

“Charlotte, he is an idiot. He doesn’t know that he had the best and he threw it away.”  Charlotte was touched by his words.  They spoke for quite awhile.  Neither seemed in a hurry to end their conversation.

“We need to keep in touch.  Are you on Whats App or any social media?” Jake asked hopefully.  He almost gave a virtual high five when she replied that she was and gave him her information.  She was also on Facebook. 

“Well its been lovely speaking with you.” She finally said. “Let’s try to connect.”

“Sure thing.” Replied Jake hating to end their conversation.  By the time he put the phone down he was already on line trying to connect with her.  He couldn’t seem to make the connection on Facebook and called her back.  Together they figured it out.

“I could have talked to you for a long time,” he told her.

“Me too,” she agreed.  Her heart tugged when she received a message from him that he would like to speak to her again tomorrow if she was available.  Charlotte knew that she would make herself available.  She had really enjoyed speaking to him she told herself, but her heart told her that there was another reason.  Humming to herself, Charlotte went about her usual daily routine, wondering at her temerity at calling Jake.  She couldn’t believe that he had had a crush on her all those years.  How could she not know.  Things might have been very different if they had both not been so shy.  She hugged the knowledge to herself feeling like she was wrapped in a blanket warm and cozy.  Her heart sang.

Jake could barely contain himself.  He was in awe of the fact that Charlotte liked him and also in disbelief.  How had he not known.  She was his dream girl.  She was his princess.  She was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen and no woman he had met in his life had ever matched up to her.  He had been so in love with her that throughout the years he always looked for women that reminded him of her.  Had he known that she was in an unhappy marriage, hell, only God knows what he would have done.  He couldn’t believe that she had had such a hard life and he ached for her.  He wanted to protect her.  He was angry and hurt at the same time.  All those years of yearning for this woman only to find out now some 20 years later that she had felt the same for him.  He had never stopped wanting her.  She had asked him why he didn’t become her friend.  He would tell her one day he vowed that he didn’t want to be her friend.  He had wanted to be her husband.  He had wanted to be her lover.  That he still felt the same today was a shock to Jake.  He was a happily married man, in love with his wife and his kids.  How can he still feel this way about Charlotte.  He cursed fate.  Their paths had just not crossed at the right time and now he was bound by his vows and she was forbidden to him.  His body was doing strange things to him and like all the times before, he felt the heat in his loins as his manhood hardened thinking of her.

 

Chapter 2

Jake messaged Charlotte the next day to ask if she could chat.  She readily agreed.  He asked if she could video chat.

“Oooh, I don’t like to video chat.  I always look awful.” She said laughing.

“Please,” he entreated, “I’d like to see you.” 

“Ok…give me a minute.   Shall I call or will you.?

“I will call.”

Charlotte accepted his request to video chat and almost caught her breath as she was staring at the man who she had dreamt of for so long. 

“You look amazing.” She told him.

“Wow, you are still so beautiful.” Was his reply.  Jake could not take his eyes off her.  She was stunning.

They stared at each other, both a  little shy.  He loved the way she tilted her head and he could still see the coyness in her.  He felt hot and shocked as his body responded to the sight of her.  He shifted uncomfortably in his chair.

They talked for hours.  He told her that she still did things to him and he was in awe of her.  She shyly admitted that she too was smitten and could hardly wait to speak to him today.  She was so happy he messaged her.  Life for Jake and Charlotte would never be quite the same again.  This was the start of many days of video chatting and messaging. Sharing intimate thoughts and moments with each other.  Jake told her about his wife and kids and how much he loved them.  He said he would never do anything to hurt them.  He was sad that they had missed so many opportunities.  He told her that if he had known she was unhappy, he would have sought her out but he always thought she was happy and that was all he ever wanted for her.  He told her how much he still loved her and all he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her.  He wanted to protect her.  He would have treated her like a princess.

“Jake, why did you not become my friend?” Charlotte asked him again one day. “It would have been a lot easier and who knows what could have happened.”

“I didn’t want to be your friend.  I wanted to be your husband.  I wanted to be your lover.” He told her sending shivers down her spine.  Jake had been surprised at Charlotte’s naivete and sexual inexperience and it ached him because he wanted to be the one to teach her and make her feel the things she should be feeling.  He wanted her so badly it was a constant ache within him.  Their chats and messaging took on a different nuance.  He told her what he would like to do to her.  Charlotte was shocked at her response.  She lost her inhibition and shared their intimate experience albeit via the phone.  At first she was shy but gradually he made her feel so comfortable with him.  Everything with Jake was easy.  She told him things she wanted to do to him.  Together the experienced the physicality of their relationship without laying a finger on each other.  He watched her and she watched him.  She saw him and he saw her.  It was magical.  It was electrifying.  Both were powerless to stop the feelings that were raging within them.

“I love you  Jake.” She told him one day.  “I wasn’t looking for you or for this.  I know nothing can come of it but I wanted you to know that I love you.  I can name that feeling now.  I know what it was that I was feeling all along.”

“I love you too. Never forget that Babe.  No matter what happens.  I would do anything for you.  I would go to the ends of the earth for you.  I still can’t believe that you liked me all those years ago.  I am in total awe.  I want you to know that I worship the ground you walk on.  You are my princess.   I put you on a pedestal because I knew you were out of my league.  You will never know how I pined for you all those years.” Jake was humble expressing his love for Charlotte.  He was regretful that they had not connected before.  He was sorry that he could not offer her anything because he would not betray his wife or kids.  She told him she understood and was grateful for his love.  Knowing that he was somewhere in this world was enough and that he loved her was enough for her.  Charlotte could not have envisaged how wrong she was. 

Charlotte did not hold back either she shared her feelings freely with Jake.

“Jake when I called you, I was kind of into you without really knowing how much or understanding why.  I wanted so badly for you to know that I was thinking of you.  What I feel for you now is something that has insidiously grown into something stronger and deeper.”

“I have loved you Charlotte since I was fourteen, although at first it was not sexual.  That came later as my love for you grew.  By the time I was 18, I was totally in love with you and I wanted you so badly.  I can’t believe that you could even look at me much less that you love me.”  Jake recognized that what he had felt for Charlotte was one thing but his feelings had evolved and intensified.  She was an extension of himself.  He wondered how it was possible to love two women.  He loved his wife.  He loved Charlotte.  He knew his love for Charlotte was different but would not admit it to her.  She was consuming him and day after day as they talked, shared and loved each other, he began to realize how important she had become to him.  He could not fathom a day when she would not be in his life and he knew he could never lose her again.  He knew he could never have more than what they have right now. He could not betray his wife or the vows he took. So he tried to suppress the ache within him torn between this new born passion and wanting for Charlotte and loyalty to his family.

One day during a video chat session he noticed Charlotte was playing with her chest.  He had noticed it before and had tried hard not to focus on it.  Her hands would slide inside her top and his imagination was rampant with visions of her playing with her breast.  It was driving him wild today and he could not help smiling widely as he realized that she was totally unaware of what she was doing.

“Why are you smiling?” she asked.  His smile widened into a grin.

“Do you know that you play with your breasts?” he asked relishing in the shyness that enveloped her and she became self-conscious and coy.  This was one of the things he had first loved about her and his heart contracted with desire and love for her.  He felt the familiar stirring in his loins, aching to touch her.

“Don’t be shy, don’t stop.  I like it.” His smile telling her that he was enjoying himself.  Charlotte suddenly felt hot and the heat was rising.

“Oh my god, I never realized I did that.  I hope I don’t do it all the time.” She exclaimed mortified.  Jake hated the thought that she did this in front of anyone else.

“I hope not.” He murmured.  Something in his tone alerted Charlotte and she gave him an odd look and then she realized that Jake was jealous.  Being Charlotte she could not resist probing.

“Would it bother you if I did?” she asked innocently.

“Yes, I think it would.” He replied guardedly. “What do your n*****s look like?”  Even as the words left his mouth he knew he should never have uttered them.  He could not stop himself.  He was being driven by his baser instincts.  He wanted to see her.  He wanted to touch her.  He envisioned her breasts and wanted to bury his face in them.

“Well they are not big…in fact I think they are quite small….” Charlotte fumbled embarrassed as she tried to describe her n*****s to this man.

“Well if I could see them I could tell you….” Jake let his voice trail off, his eyes never leaving her face.  He saw the conflicting emotions flit across her face, “please” he entreated.

Charlotte’s eyes were wide “Do you really want to see them?”

“Yes” he replied tenderly loving her shyness.  His smile was wide and he bit his lower lip.  Jake was fully turned on now.  Charlotte could not explain when of their own volition, her hands pulled down her top and showed Jake her breasts.

“I hate them.  They are way too big” Charlotte prattled on as she was wont to do when she was nervous. “I have had a complex about them since I was 18 when some random Italian guy grabbed them.  I was walking down Oxford Circus, I was so embarrassed and ever since had a complex about them being huge.”

Her breasts were curvy and full.  She was stunning.  Jake imagined sucking her n*****s one at a time.  Sucking them hard.  He told her what he wanted to do.  He couldn’t help himself and wondered if she knew that he had a full hard on.

“Are you disappointed?” she asked.

“Why would I be disappointed?  They are amazing Charlotte.  I wanted to see more.” He confessed chuckling low and sexy.

Jake and Charlotte’s virtual romance had taken a turn.  An erotic turn.  Each call became more erotic and more revealing, going one step further than the last.  Each message was erotic meant to elicit responses from both of them.  They talked about sex.  Jake wanted to know what pleased Charlotte and he was surprised and yet pleased that considering she had been married for so long she was incredibly naïve and sexually repressed.  He wondered what had been wrong with her husband.  If she had been his….well she isn’t, the little voice in  his head reminded him.  Jake had turned a corner and could not go back.

“I want you.” He told her as he felt the surge in his loins.  His hardness was powerfully strong and he told her.  Her eyes widened as he showed her.

“I want you too.” She whispered back.  They stared at each other consumed with wanting.  He shocked her when he said he would have to go and take care of himself.

“What….what do you mean….you mean….” She stammered not able to articulate or say the words.

“Jerk off, masturbate…?” he teased, “hell yes. Don’t you do that.  Don’t you touch yourself?”

“No I never have.  I thought it was sinful and that I would be punished.  Definitely go to hell.”  She laughed embarrassed.

“It’s very normal Charlotte.  Its not a sin.  You have to release sexual tension otherwise it is more harmful. There is nothing wrong with it.  You are telling me truthfully that you have never masturbated?

“No I haven’t.  I’ve wanted to but I kept thinking it was wrong and then I would imagine my grandma in heaven turning over in her grave….” She giggled.  Jake laughed out loud.  She was so funny and endearing and he wished he could reach through the phone and hug her.  Her sexual innocence astounded him, yet oddly thrilled him.  He felt deep regret that he would not be the one to teach her the art of making love, enjoying it and how to please herself.  He wanted to be her lover pure and simple and yet he knew he couldn’t be.  Just one night with her, he told himself.  That’s all I would want, just one night.  Would that be so wrong?  His mind knew the answer even if his heart said differently.  Jake had learnt how to please a woman before pleasing himself and he wanted to do that for Charlotte.  He wanted her to fully enjoy her womanhood.  He wanted to watch her face as she came and he wanted to hear her say his name as she climaxed.  He wanted to feel her mouth on him.  He ached and fantasised that she would wake him up with her mouth on his shaft giving him the most amazing blow job.  He wanted to bury himself deep within her and pound her until they were both spent and she could barely walk.

Jake never shared all of himself to Charlotte.  He was afraid to.  He had to keep control of himself because he was afraid of what he would do.  He knew Charlotte sensed it and it bothered her.  Charlotte thought Jake was naïve and thought he could control at will this thing that existed between them.  She knew he was torn and sometimes she thought she should just end it and walk away to save him the hurt and angst.  Once she suggested that to him and was shocked that he told her he couldn’t do it.  Yet the fact that he held back on her drove her crazy.

“What are you thinking of?”

“I was thinking of how much I love looking at you and how much I love speaking with you.  I am still in awe that you love me.  I can’t believe all those years, wasted years, missed opportunities.”

“Do you want to know something?” Charlotte asked innocently enough but Jake’s guard was always up never knowing how to gauge her questions or indeed answer them without hurting her.

“What..” he said cautiously.

“I love you with all my heart.  Jake, I never could have envisaged that this would all come out of one phone call. I wasn’t looking for this.  I wasn’t looking to fall in love with you.”

Jake was humbled by her sincerity and his fear that she would end up hating him when he would have to tell her it would end.

“Charlotte, please always remember now matter what happens I love you.  I have always loved you.  You know that we can’t continue this way and someday soon we will have to slow things down.”

His voice, his tone filled Charlotte with dread.  She dreaded not being able to speak to him or to be in contact somehow. She knew as well that the time was coming soon but having Jake put it into words struck her to her core.  She would try to mask her emotions quickly so Jake would not see the devastation his words evoked; and then there were days when she was confused because their conversation would be light and fun and saying goodbye seemed far away.  There were days when she needed him to tell her exactly what he felt for her because she was so afraid that he didn’t love her as much as he said he did.  She would analyse their conversation after each chat and convince herself that he perhaps didn’t care as much as he said he did. Her heart knew he did but her mind played some wicked tricks on her.

“Tell me more about how you feel for me Jake, please.  I need to store it away for those dark days to come.” She would entreat her face sad and crestfallen.

“Charlotte I have loved you for over 20 odd years. I never forgot you.  Every woman in my life paled against you.  I looked for women that either resembled you or reminded me of you.  I worship the ground you walk on.  In another life you would be mine and I would rock your world.  You would be loved and cared for like no one else had ever done for you before. You would be mine, all mine.”

Charlotte was often so moved by his expression of love.  She had never experienced anything like this before and she clung to every word he uttered.  She was in awe of how she had fallen in love with this man.  Theirs was a unique story.  He had never touched her.  This love had to be the purest love and it reminded her of a song, “ My eyes adored you, though you never laid a hand on me.”  Jake told her about every aspect of his life, somethings he never shared with anyone else.  He always told her it felt so right to tell her and he could do it because he had such faith and trust in her.  He told her about his divorce from his first wife and what it had done to him.  He was young, found her cheating on him and it broke his heart.  He went on a bender for a while sleeping with any woman who come into his life because he was lonely and broken.  Charlotte was jealous of every one of those women.  They had a piece of Jake that she would never have and she told him so.

“Why oh why, did you never reach out to me?” she had asked as he laughed at her confession.

“Because I thought you were happily married.  Believe me you were on my mind.”

“How many women did you sleep with” Charlotte dared to ask knowing that she would hate the answer.  His handsome face clouded with sadness.

“Charlotte..” he would protest, you don’t want to know about that.”

“Come on, tell me, like a hundred. “ she was persistent

“No not a hundred.  Can we talk about something else.” He finally told her with an embarrassed laugh.

“You meanie, you slept with so many women and could not even save one night for me!” she had said petulantly.

“I was lonely Charlotte.  Lonely and hurt.  And where were you when I needed you!” he had retorted sharper that intended, flinching as he saw the hurt flash across her face. 

Each call, each message was an exploration and explanation of their feelings for each other.  Charlotte had never forgotten that Jake had a family but it did cut her to the quick when during one of their chats he told her that he was taking his family away on a family vacation.  He added that this would perhaps be the cooling down period for them both as it would be difficult to communicate even though he would try.

“I hope you understand. I love my wife and my kids.  I put them above every thing else in my life.  I would never want to do anything to hurt them and I know things have been pretty explosive between us.” An embarrassed laugh followed.  Charlotte knew he was right but every word he spoke was like a dagger in her heart.  They had spoken many times of this.  The day he had to leave came so quickly,

“I guess this is it for a while babe.” He told her sadly, “I will try to message you but it won’t be often.  Please remember that I love you and I will be missing you.  It will be hard for both of us. But it has to be this way.”  Jake’s heart was breaking for himself but also for the look on Charlotte’s face.  He didn’t know how he would manage without speaking to her or seeing her.  He hoped that she knew how much she meant to him.  He hoped that he had told her enough times what she meant to him.

 

Section 3

Two days passed without Jake.  Charlotte moved through each day automatically.  She constantly checked her phone to see if she missed his call or message.  She knew she shouldn’t expect to hear from him but secretly she thought he would find it so hard to stay away from her he would find opportunities.  She felt empty and lost and wondered what she did with her time before Jake.  The ping came through on a day she least expected.  He had sent her an audio message. 

“Hi babe, I am on a cliff right now.  Its terribly windy and I am having a cup of coffee. Wondering how you are doing.  Ok, let me know. Bye.”  Charlotte’s heart soared at te sound of his voice. She played and replayed that message drinking in his voice.  She could tell that he was missing her.  She heard it in his voice.  He could no longer hide or suppress his feelings, it was there in his voice and indeed his very action in contacting her.  He was the one who had imposed the not being touch for a while rule and he was the first one to break it.

Jake was missing Charlotte.  He had been restless and antsy the last couple of days not hearing her voice or seeing her.  That morning he walked up to the top of the cliff with a purpose in mind to contact her.  He waited for awhile hoping she would have responded.  It took her a while.  He wondered if she was missing him.  When she replied she said she was doing fine and that she had been checking out his pictures on Whats App.  She told him she missed him.

A few days later, he received a message from her to say that she was going to be in Brussels when he came back. She was going to visit an old friend who was recently divorced.  She told him they were going to paint the town red and that perhaps this would her chance to do a one night bender.  She asked what he thought.  Jake had never felt such anger and hurt as he read her message.  He was beside himself telling himself that she was irresponsible and was putting herself in danger.  In truth he admitted to himself that he was consumed with jealousy.  He did not like the way it made him feel.  The thought of another man touching her, making love to her, kissing her was more than Jake could bear.

“Please don’t do it with anyone else.  It would kill me.” He messaged her back.

“Babe, I was just joking. I would never do something like that.  Don’t you realize that you have spoiled me for anyone else.  I love you Jake.”  Jake was not reassured by Charlotte’s response. He hated the way he was feeling, out of control with his emotions.  He could only think of making love to her, touching her, pleasing her.  Making her his in every way.

“By the way,” he asked casually, “is your friend a he or she?”

“She.”  Charlotte could tell that Jake was off, “Her name is Jane and we are just spending the weekend together catching up since her divorce.”

“Well becareful, there are a lot of crazy people out there.”  He sounded distant and nonchalant to Charlotte.  Jake was anything but distant and nonchalant.  He minded very much that she was going.  He didn’t feel right about it.  He was relieved a day later when she messaged to say that plans had fallen through and Jane was coming to London instead though his relief was short lived.

“Hi babe, so Jane will be staying in London at a hotel and I will join her for the weekend.  She will be with her new boyfriend.  By the way, she has a friend that she is trying to set me up with and he is coming too, but I told her that I am not interested..

“Oh, she is hooking up with her boyfriend? And she has a friend for you?” he asked trying hard not to lose his temper.  He wondered how naïve Charlotte could be.  He had sensed all along that something like this would be the outcome, he thought savagely.  Could she not see this was going to be a double date?  Did she secretly want to meet this person, he wondered jealously.  He betrayed none of the emotions or crazy thoughts running through his head.  He couldn’t do this.  It was killing him.  Instead he told her to be careful and have a good time.  Charlotte was surprised he ended the chat abruptly.  She messaged him back to tell him not to worry she would be careful but he never replied.

As it happened Rob turned out to be a pretty decent guy and if Charlotte’s heart was not already taken, she could have possibly explored that avenue.  Charlotte thought she was nuts because she could never have a real physical tangible relationship with Jake and here was Rob, and she was just not interested.  She didn’t want to encourage Rob so politely made an excuse feigning a headache and returned to her room.  The next morning she left Jane a note and slipped out of the hotel room.

“Hi babe, are you there?” she messaged Jake as soon as she got back to her apartment.

“Hi.” He replied immediately, “how was your evening with Rib?”

“It’s Rob and it wasn’t too bad except that I missed you.”

“So what did you do?” Jake asked the question but wasn’t sure that he wanted to know.  “So it was Jane and her new man; and you and Blob?” Charlotte was puzzled by Jake’s misspelling of Rob’s name.  So out of character for him.

Jake could not help himself, his anger returning swiftly, “I guess that would be a date? No?  A foursome? So how was your date with Blob?”

Charlotte went quiet as she realized that Jake was upset and angry.  No she told herself, he was jealous.

“Babe it wasn’t like that.” She attempted to explain only  to be interrupted as he interjected.

“Charlotte it’s ok.  You’re a grown woman and if you had a good time, that’s ok. It’s not as if I have any right to tell you what to do.”  A frissom of fear ran through Charlotte.

“Jake are you upset?  Did you mind that I went?  Please tell me”

“Yes I minded.  I knew it was a date and you were being set up.  I was worried.  I trust you but when alcohol is involved, as I am sure it was, I wouldn’t trust any man around you especially one who is interested in you.  Did he touch you?”  Jake hated himself for asking even though the didn’t want to know.

“Jake, nothing happened.” She told him quietly.  “We had dinner.  I pretended I had a headache and went to my room.  I left early this morning.”

Jake was not mollified.  He was irritated and angry.  He did not like the way he was feeling.  His emotions were all over the place and he felt the tight control he had on himself spiralling out of control.

“Am I crazy Jake?  Am I crazy to keep myself for you even though I know I will never be with you.  Never have you?  You have a family, a loving wife.  You don’t belong to me.” Her tone earnest making Jake flinch.

‘“Wrong person to ask.” His message seemed terse.

“Why?”

“Because selfishly I will say no you are not crazy because I want you for myself even though there can be nothing physical between us.  That isn’t fair to you Charlotte.  I don’t have any right to tell you what to do or to even try to stop you.  You should be able to do what you want to do and if you wanted to spend a night with Blob, then you should have done.”

“Stop that!” Charlotte messaged him angrily.  She was angry that Jake persisted in saying he had no right when clearly it mattered to him what she did. She wondered why he just would not own what he was feeling.  Why would he not say he was jealous.  God knows she always told him when she was jealous. More over she was angry that he failed to realize that he was everything to her.

“Babe, please don’t be angry and stop saying you have no right.  If I was some fly by night interest to you then I can understand you saying that.  I know we have come way past that and that it mattered to you that I went out with Bob last night.  Why are you afraid to own me? I have bared my soul to you Jake.  I have told you things that I never told a single soul.  I don’t just love you Jake, I fell in love with you.  I can’t change that. Don’t you think it would make my life a lot easier if I didn’t feel this way?”

Jake read her words with a heavy heart.  Her words touched him to the core of his being yet he couldn’t shake the anger that he was feeling.  After all she wasn’t his.  He couldn’t reach out and touch her.  He would never hold her.  He was a selfish prick, he told himself, he couldn’t have her and didn’t want anyone else to have her.  He felt a physical pain in his gut as the image of her entangled in another man’s arms.  Another man holding her.  Another man loving her.  Another man doing things to her that he wanted to do. So Jake did what he typically did when he couldn’t handle it.

“I have to go, bye for now.” And he ended the chat.   Charlotte’s anger did not abate.  She was left hanging feeling guilty.  Feeling like she had betrayed him.  He always left her on the precipice of something and she tried hard to understand but tonight she could not.

Jake’s sense of despair persisted and he messaged Charlotte early the next morning asking  her to video chat.  Charlotte felt the cold hand of fear clutch at her heart the moment she saw him.  He was serious, and he could not meet her eyes.  Every word he spoke cut her heart into pieces.  Hit her like a ton of brick.  She should have been prepared for this day but she wasn’t.

“Did I do something to upset you?   Did I do something wrong?” she asked him tearfully.

“No babe,” his tone softer and sadder. “We both knew this day was coming.  We talked about it before remember?” Jake’s heart was breaking as he watched her struggle for composure.  He loved this woman.  He loved her with every fibre of his being.  He loved the sound of her voice.  He loved her strength.  He loved her courage.  It saddened him to have to end his relationship with her and didn’t know how he would manage but he knew it had to be done.  He hated his reaction to her being out there open to any and every one. He hated the way he felt when he looked at Sharon.  He couldn’t do it anymore.  Not to Charlotte.  Not to Sharon.  Not to himself.

“Promise me Charlotte, promise me that you will remember that there is someone out there in this world who loves you very much.  I have always loved you.  We missed our chance and can’t turn back now.  I would have been so proud to have you on my arms.  To love you the way you deserve to be loved.”  His voice broke.  Charlotte was crying openly now.  Words would not come.  She could only nod.  She lifted her hand to the phone to touch his face, and then he was gone.

 

Section 4

Jake had always liked London.  London buzzing with activity and people.  People at every corner.  Tourists with their cameras.  Londoners rushing to her jobs.  A crazy busy place where you can find almost anything to do and do almost anything.  He rushed across the road dodging in between black cabs as he made his way to one of the terrace homes.  He fished in his pocket to find the piece of paper he had written the number of the house on and proceeded to ring the doorbell.  As he waited his mind thoughts of Charlotte flitted through his mind.  He knew coming to London would be difficult and that she would be on his mind.  He had fantasised many scenarios of accidentally meeting her.  One of the hardest thing Jake had ever done in his life was to say goodbye to Charlotte.  It was four months since he last communicated with her.  There wasn’t a day that went by when he didn’t miss her and he was sorely tempted to contact her.  He missed her voice.  He missed her laugh.  He missed her.  Jake was saved from his traitorous thoughts as his friend Sam opened the door.  Jake was engulfed in a huge man bear hug.  He and Sam had been friends since school days and tried to meet up at least every year. 

“Very nice,” Jake told Sam taking in his environment as they walked into the crowded living room.  Jake spotted a few mutual friends as Sam conducted a mini tour of the house. 

“Last is the kitchen, which is where I think Ella is, and also the bar with finger foods.” Sam told Jake.  Ella was Sam’s live in love.  As they made their way to the kitchen at the back of the house, Jake stopped frequently to meet people he knew.  Jake approached the open arched doorway leading to the kitchen.  It was crowded with people.  He laughed to himself thinking wherever the food and drinks are that’s where the people will be.  Scanning the room for Ella, he froze blinking rapidly, standing leaning against the kitchen sink was Charlotte.  She was in deep conversation with a man.  A thousand thoughts ran through Jake’s mind.  Who was she talking to?  What was she doing here?  His stomach tightened as the man raised his hand to tuck a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

“Jake my man, come and meet my buddy Rob and his girl friend, Charlotte.” Sam steered Jake toward Charlotte.  She looked up at that moment and saw Jake. 

“Hey Rob, meet my best man, Jake….Jake ….Rob….and this is Charlotte, Rob’s girlfriend.”  Jake and Rob shook hands, his eyes never leaving Charlotte’s shocked face.

“Charlotte…” he greeted her coolly.  Rob, he thought, could this be Blob? Their gaze locked and Jake felt the familiar jolt shoot through his body as the love he felt for her surged.  He made no move toward her remaining aloof and that took every ounce of strength that he possessed. 

Charlotte was stunned. She could not believe that Jake was standing in front of her, pretending he didn’t know her and acting cold and distant.  She had started toward him but stopped taken aback by his coldness.  What was he doing here?  Why was he in London?  She had fantasized many different scenarios of when she might run into Jake never really believing that she ever would.  She stood there awkwardly as the men talked and when she felt she could not take it anymore she asked for an excuse and walked out of the kitchen.

Jake’s eyes scanned the room for Charlotte throughout the evening but he never found her.  He noticed Rob was missing also and could not help but feel a pang of jealousy.  He knew why Charlotte had walked away in the kitchen.  He knew she was hurt by his coldness and in a moment he had felt a small sense of satisfaction.  Now he was anxious and feeling frustration that grew as he realized that she may have left the party.  He forced himself to socialize and then pleaded tiredness to Sam to leave.  How could he have let Charlotte leave like that.  He heard from Ella that she had left and that knocked him six ways to next week. 

Jake said his goodbyes pulling up the collar of his coat as he stepped onto the kerb.  That was when he spotted Charlotte.  She was alone and a taxi pulled up alongside her.  He didn’t stop to think, he ran forward and literally pushed her into the cab jumping in to sit beside her.  She raised startled, frightened eyes that widened when she realized that it was Jake.

“What are you doing?” she asked staring at him.

“I don’t know.” He answered hoarsely returning her stare.

“Ah, guvnor, where to?” asked the cab driver.

“Actually nowhere,” Jake responded decisively grabbing Charlotte’s hand and pulling her out of the cab.  He gave the driver some money and turned to Charlotte.  He still had hold of her hand and she tried to pull it away.  He released her hand as she pivoted and started to walk away.  Away from him.

Charlotte didn’t know where she was going.  She let her feet take her.  She was conscious that Jake fell into step with her.  Her hurt and anger toward him that had been simmering threatened to escalate.  Neither one of them spoke.  Jake realized they were at the Thames embankment when Charlotte suddenly stopped and leaned over the metal railing staring at the dark murky water.  Charlotte didn’t know how long she stood there.  Her mind raced feverishly.  A mixture of love for this man, hurt and confusion clouded her head.  She had been shocked to see Jake, a surge of exhilarating happiness coursing through her only to be dampened by his cold, distant attitude.  She groaned softly swing away from the railing and collided with something solid.  Her knees buckled and she would have fallen but for Jake’s strong arms steadying her.  Charlotte took a deep breath conscious that she was being held against his chest.  She lifted her eyes to meet his and that was her undoing.  She was powerless against his magnetism.  All her anger seemed to dissipate.

“Why are you here?” she whispered.

“Here as in now, or here as in the UK?” he asked with a tinge of humour.  Jake was in trouble and had to diffuse the situation.  He wanted to hold on to Charlotte and never let her go again.  He had craved for her over the past few months and now here she was in the flesh and God knows he was only human in wanting her. He couldn’t stay angry at her for long though the question of Blob was still in his mind.  As he looked into her beautiful face he was tempted to hold on to her tightly and tell her how much he missed her.  How the very sight of her with Blob had driven him crazy. He wanted to tell her that she belonged to him.  She was his and only his.  Instead he set her free and put some safe distance between them.

Charlotte stared at Jake.  He was her knight in shining armour, had always been and she was utterly defenceless against him.  Charlotte sighed deeply.  A few hours ago she had been happily contemplating moving to Brussels for a new start, perhaps explore a relationship with Bob. 

“Bob!” she thought…”Oh my God, what must Jake be thinking?” looking up into his face to find him staring at her.

“Jake…about Bob…” she began, only to be interrupted by Jake holding up his two hands as if to fend her off.

“It’s fine Charlotte…no explanations needed. I take it Blob is the Blob from Brussels and that perhaps there was more to that night in London than I previously was led to believe.”

Charlotte was stunned and then she was angry. 

“Not that I need to explain anything to you Jake, after all you keep telling me that I am nothing to you, but for information, Bob is not my boyfriend.  He is a friend who was there for me when I badly needed one.  Nothing happened that night.  I told you that. There is only friendship on my part and that is all I am responsible for.  And his name is Bob not Blob.” She was very angry and her voice rose to a high pitch.  She reached forward and pushed Jake in the chest before turning and walking away from him.  She didn’t need to take that from him.  Who the hell did he think he was? She fumed silently as she walked quickly away. 

“Charlotte wait!” she heard Jake call her but she kept on walking.  She loved this man so much.  Had saved herself for him even though she knew nothing would ever come of it.  After months of sight nor sound of him, she meets him in the flesh and all he had was coldness and the effrontery to imply that she had cheated on him.  Jake caught up to her, grabbed her shoulder and spun her round to face him.  She resisted but he was strong as she had always suspected, those arms would be strong.

“I’m sorry.” He told her, “I am sorry.  I am jealous.  There you have it.  It was a shock seeing you there. I always imagined meeting up with you and there you were with Blob.”  As he spoke he pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her.

“I love you Charlotte, I love you….” He kept whispering, “you are so beautiful.  God help me ….” He muttered before capturing her soft lips with his mouth. Charlotte smelted in his embrace.  She had dreamt of this moment for so long and her response was swift and passionate.  When he lifted his lips from hers he buried his head into her neck.  Charlotte felt the desperation in Jake as he nuzzled her neck.  He had crossed his own line and could not turn back.  He wanted more.  He loved the taste of her.  He loved the scent of her. 

“Charlotte, Charlotte.” He whispered her name again and again.  The urgency of his hands and the tautness of his body against hers an indication of his passion.  Suddenly, he put her from him, running his hand through his hair, breathing heavily.

“Oh my God. I can’t live without you.  I need to be with you.”  He said struggling for control.

“Jake what are you saying?” Charlotte asked holding her breath.

They found a street side café with tables on the embankment.  As they sipped on coffee Jake told Charlotte he wanted to be with her.  They talked about future plans and that he would have to put things right back home with his family.  The talked for hours, Charlotte wanted Jake to make sure he was doing the right thing. He told her he had known all along but had hoped he could bury her away in his heart as he had done for the past 20 years.

As they sat there, neither one knew how things would play out. The only thing they knew was that they were doing it together this time.

Author's Note

ignore grammar. I would like to know if I have potential with this story as well as if I am a good writer. what am I lacking, etc.