Gone

A story

the wind that blew
across the fields of barley
ripened in the sun
whispered words of secrets heard
to listening ears of mischief done

yet now the harvest gathered in
leaves no sign of what took place
though left to hang upon a gate
a fragment caught of torn
white lace

so where is she the girl he kissed
before he struck that fatal blow
no witnesses to tell the tale
she a loner isn’t missed
she’s buried in the earth below

there she lies in long dug ground
defiled and tragic, undeserved
her resting place away from all
the living hearts that daily beat
she’s never likely to be found

Reviews

[Rustling Leaves]

I love the back and forth of rhyming and not rhyming. The story is lowercase to keep the pace unbroken and letting the breaks do all the talking. It conveys the quietness of tragedies that get buried, the quietus even. It is quiet but in the way that a stranger staring at you is quiet.

[Chris Shaw]

Many thanks for stopping by Rustling Leaves and leaving a review for me. I very much appreciate your visit. All the best. .

[John the Baptist]

Leaves me wondering if it is based on a real event. It comes across as a memory of one who lived in the area of the crime. I think the paucity of details is deliberate, the lack of the girl's identity making the crime all the more tragic.

[Chris Shaw]

The inspiration for this John was the troubles in Northern Ireland in the 70’s. I deliberately kept it vague. What I wanted to convey was injustice. Thanks for stopping by. Much appreciated.

[Thomas W Case]

Tremendous imagery. You take the reader into the scene.

[Chris Shaw]

Many thanks Thomas. I appreciate your words.

[Omikron]

Spectacular as always, Chris. I was appalled to see your account was down for a moment, I'm glad you're back. The world needs more poets like you in it.

[Chris Shaw]

Oh my friend, your review delights me. Thank you for your kindness. I took a break. I was weary. Your response, has lifted me. Thank you so much. I appreciate these words more than you know.

[Orphic Dreamer]

The storytelling and how you smoothly added the darker tones is almost seamless and breath-taking. It is so enigmatic and soul-wrenching in the best way possible.

[Chris Shaw]

Your review is such an encouragement for me. I haven’t been able to write for a while. Thank you so much for stopping by today.

[Ken Simm.]

I almost feel this has a Thomas Hardy feel to it. A palpable atmosphere. That strikes home in its Englishness.

[Chris Shaw]

Many thanks Ken and especially for mentioning me in the same breath as Thomas Hardy. If I remind you of his Englishness, than I am honoured. A poet and author very much admired. I appreciate you stopping by. Have a beautiful day. Hope all is well in your world.

[Andrew John]

I rather agree with Jacob's description where he talks of a haunting quality. There's certainly sadness here - and indeed a shudder. (Oh, and we do have ears and ears - the things we've had for years and years that will be witnessed by seers and seers! Cheers!)

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Andrew. Yes we have ears, and so does the barley crop. I’m pleased that this poem created a haunting atmosphere. Many thanks for stopping by today. All the best.

[duff]

The title sets the tone in mystery and where this could go. Packed by raw emotion in rugged ground. Nice work Chris.

[Chris Shaw]

Thanks duff. Always good to find you have stopped by. I appreciate your encouragement. Have a good day.

[Samuel Dickens]

I search my imagination for more details, wanting to know how and why this tragedy happened. Like Jacob, I feel a haunting vibe to the story. For the life of me, I'll never understand such senseless brutality. I love your rhymes and the story is the best.

[Chris Shaw]

Many thanks Sam for leaving me such an encouraging response. I appreciate you stopping by and I am pleased as punch that you liked the story line. Your stories are ace.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Such a sad tragedy too often real in a society where life is cheap and time is expensive. This reminded me of the true Appalachian tales of Tom Dooley and Frankie Silver. I enjoyed.

[Chris Shaw]

Thanks Fabian. Not familiar with the stories you have mentioned, but delighted that my poem was an enjoyable read for you. There is a great deal of injustice about. That was what I was trying to convey here. All the best.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

They're famous murders near where I grew up. Tom Dooley (actually Dula) was hanged in Statesville, NC in 1868 for the murder of his lover, Laura Foster. Frankie Silver (a woman) was hanged in Morganton, NC in 1833 for the axe murder of her husband in which all of his body was never recovered. They're both immortalized in poem, story and song. The Kingston Trio did a song called Tom Dooley that was very famous in the sixties.

[Chris Shaw]

Oh yes Tom Dooley. Hang down your head Tom Dooley, hang down your head and cry …..Remember that . Gosh, woman with an axe. How gruesome. Appreciate you coming back with further info. I’ve got some reading to do. Thanks Fabian.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

One of my ancestors, Mary Jane Denton, was supposedly at the hanging of Frankie Silver in Morganton in 1833. It was the last time a woman was hanged in the county. People were morbid in their entertainments back then. I imagine a lot of people gathered to see Henry's queen's heads roll. Not so different. But it's history and I love anything and everything about history, especially the anthropology and archaeology digs. Such interesting things. I had two brothers living in Statesville, one now living there. So...such cool things to explore close to home. I've been where Blackbeard the pirate was killed on Ocracoke Island a few times. I love it there. Real life is freaky and people think fiction is strange.

[Chris Shaw]

You know public executions, just freak me out, but history was very cruel back in the day. Particularly the Tudor period. Henry VIII was a tyrant.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I just finished reading Legacy by Susan Kay about Elizabeth I. Great book, though fiction. It still has some historical content. It was worth the 650 page read, definitely. Bought it at our local public library book sale. Love Kay's books. I had earlier read "Phantom" by her.