When Heart and Mind Don’t Align

(another one on outcomes of addiction)

Marie gave an assurance
as she invited me
to press my hand on her
baby bump to feel her
unborn kick

that the fluttering movements
inside her warmth
meant everything in the
world to her

so I gifted a crib
my youngest grandson’s first bed
a fond momento
crafted and carved in oak
even though i doubted
her sincerity

unemployed and skint
living on benefits
no family
surfing on sofas

i wanted to be wrong
i so wanted to be wrong
because my gut instincts
had her placed on a pathway
to oblivion

my sixth sense
kicked in and the doubt grew
like a piece of knitting on
oversized and disappointed
needles

she messaged me
a couple of months down the
line to say she had given birth
her daughter had been taken
into foster care
because ………………..

my heart sank
my brain remained on an even keel
and I swear I saw it wagging
a pointed finger in my
direction

telling me
i told you so
i told you so

……………….

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

It's probably better for the child. Perhaps they can find the babe a loving home with wonderful parents to care for it and raise it up to become a responsible and contributing member of society. I feel worse for the ones that aren't taken away soon enough and become neglected pawns of a self-perpetuating cycle. My niece lost both her twins because of such. But her brother and his girlfriend (they are more like husband and wife) took the children and are raising them as their own. They are now about 17. They have a good home with some semblance of normality and structure. But it was sad to see their mother at our family Christmas party maybe waiting to see if her daughters might appear. They didn't. Her son, age 10 is in the custody of his father and came with my sister, his grandmother. So she did get to see him for a few minutes. But I think I understand why her brother chose not to attend. I'd have liked to have seen him though and told him how pleased with him I am for stepping up to raise his nieces.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Fabian. The child has to come first. We raised my daughter’s three children. It was essential to us they stayed within the family environment. It has worked out very well although hard work for my husband and I. The rewards are immense. Your share reminds me common this situation is and also how sad it can be. I so appreciate your visit.

Chris

[Fabian G. Franklin]

It's a social problem far too common. The cost of addiction isn't borne by the addict alone but by everyone in their lives and society as a whole. That's the saddest part; those suffering from addiction who aren't even addicts. Because they never had a choice. Children lose parents, parents lose children and the cycle of destruction just tumbles on like dominoes.

[Neville]

you have just poemed and so well, what I sadly see so very often .. maybe not so much in very recent years as it did maybe ten years ago or more .. but it happens and far too often .. Neville

[Chris Shaw]

Thanks Neville. When your head says no and your heart pleads yes. These things happen. Yes, I imagine you have seen this type of scenario often over the years. They have to want to help themselves.

Chris

[Ken Simm.]

Such an empathic write. Beautifully constructed. It leads the readers thoughts into the loss and the tragedy almost inevitably. Sadly but beautifully written.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Ken for your kind review. I’m pleased you enjoyed this poem.

Chris

[andrew mitchell]

This rejection or not bonding happens also in the animal world so many in zoos especially cats where the cubs are reared by humans. There’s a lot we don’t understand why this happens maybe post natal depression or maybe the mother deep down doesn’t want a child, the responsibility is just too overwhelming. Of course add the geography maybe drugs, domestic violence etc

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Andrew for sharing your thoughts and your visit. You are right that there is much we don’t understand, but in this particular case it was the curse of drugs which saw the baby taken into care. A tragic situation that the mother could not put her child before her addiction.

Chris

[andrew mitchell]

Yes you had me generalising . Drug addicts cannot be responsible, respectful or rational. The centre of their universe is the drug dependency and that’s all the brain wants sadly above everything else.

[Seriana]

Hum, Chris...I had something similar happen some years back. The girl, I knew, was not on a good path. Yet I helped her anyway, we all did. Gathering things we knew she needed to make it. It was my coworker who got taken advantage of the worst. So sad to see...but you try anyway. Because YOUR heart is in the right place. We can only do what WE can do. No control of the others.

Sometimes it works for the happy ending. You have a good heart

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Seriana. I think we all wish for happy endings don’t we? And we will do our best knowing it doesn’t always turn out. Thank you fir checking this one out. I’m sad for both the baby and her mother.

Chris

[Stella Armour]

Oh dear Chris, silly silly girl.
With all the love in the world addictions are almost impossible to break once they become long term.
I do hope you will be able to have some kind of contact with the little one, she needs to know she is loved very much ...

[Chris Shaw]

Thanks Stella. Not family. so it doesn’t upset me too much, other than the fact that she was pulling the wool over everyone’s eyes. Such a shame. A little tot in care. A mother separated from her baby.

Chris

[Stella Armour]

so often this scenario turns into a vicious circle

[Relic]

Addictions are destroying families more and more these days. It seems to be worse than when I was growing up, or at least it seems that way. The devil is loose and having a great time.

[Chris Shaw]

You are so right Tim. There is so much of it about. The current laws over here aren’t working. A radical overhaul needs to take place. Thank you so much for stopping by.

Chris

[Relic]

From what I've read, forests in California, USA, are being destroyed by cartels growing pot fields. They diverting water from streams to their fields and when they're done, they leave behind all the chemicals and paraphanelia, leaving destroyed fields. Yes, an overhaul is needed here too.
You're welcome.

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Reading you after a very long time and it felt so good. Winsome as always. I hope you're well and and happy happy Chris.

[Chris Shaw]

Well, what a nice surprise my fav Kat. I am well and hope very much you are too. Long time no see. Thank you so much for this review. I will have to buy more treats if this is more than a one off

Here you go. ……..

Chris

[John the Baptist]

Not all stories end happily ever after. If you have strong gut feelings about something, it's best to pay attention to them.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you John. I think you are wise. I like to think the best of people.

Chris

[red93]

I agree with Divya Chris. Poor Marie could not help herself, but you helped her nevertheless. More spiritual strength to you despite the eventual outcome.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Tony fir your kind review. I appreciate you.

Chris