Through The Veil

I've been doing much research on my ancestry. A poem addressed to my Great grandfather James

I thought of you today

the music was to blame.

You filtered through my soul

and greeted me in pain.

Now after all these years

of never knowing you,

why do you visit me?

I haven't got a clue.

Perhaps you came to say

you died in quiet shame.

Upon an old park bench

your only claim to fame.

It's others that you hurt

through drink you lost it all.

I've tried to understand

believe me I have trawled

Through memories and words

and though we've never met.

I think I understand

but still I can't forget

what Grandma wouldn't say

when asked about her Dad.

She turned the other way

her face was stained and sad.

But older me knows too,

we all have our own flaws.

I've been looking at my own

as well as all of yours.

And who am I to preach,

so when I think of you,

you may be out of reach,

yet love still trickles through.

Reviews

[Stella Armour]

This resonates with me Chris, i too trace family trees, and have learned so much about a grandmother i never knew yet have always felt close to.

Things were different and very hard hard in those days and so we know we must not judge.

it is strange how someone who passed on so long ago who we have never been told about can somehow slip into our hearts ..

[Chris Shaw]

Hello Stella, it is strange, but when I find out about them all, I really feel connected. It plays on my emotions. They had such terribly hard lives back then. Warfare, loss of children through diseases which have now been eliminated, lack of work, lack of healthcare, lack of housing. We all have our limits and I wonder sometimes how they ever managed, Maybe it was because everyone was in the same boat?

[Stella Armour]

well yes until i traced this grandmother of mine i ddin't know her fist child was out of wedlock then she married and had several more, then she left him took all the children to live my my grandfather , had six to him of which he did not father one of them but a Spanish lodger did and my grandfather took him on as his own, then grandfather died on the outside toilet laeving her with all these children to bring up and then she died of tb. Dreadful times, but all this it seems was not unusual... they slept with lodgers to get money to feed the existing children

[Chris Shaw]

Terrible lives they led by our standards today.

[Riddhi]

It seems really interesting..The entire concept is quite different from what I get to read here..And I must say you expressed it beautifully..Actually , the title made me read this poem..It sounded really interesting..Well , I actually never even thought about writing my ancestors..
Well done and keep on writing...

[Cherrie Palmer]

Making peace with old ghost, this poem has a smooth rhyme as you tell your tale.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Cherrie

[Kelly Scheppers]

I love going through family ancestry! All my aunts and uncles passed years ago, so its like opening boxes on Christmas morning - you simply discover something new every time you look.

I've always been one who believes that the souls of our departed are always with us. That is the message you've given us, here...and I thank you for that!

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Kelly. They certainly hover near me.

Chris

[Levi Levin]

A deeply heart-felt piece indeed! You did a wonderful job!

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you so much. I appreciate your response Levi

[Levi Levin]

Your welcome!

[Davidgeo]

The rhyme scheme and how you stick to it is top notch.

It was a fun read but with a touch of melancholy in regards to his flaws.

Makes me kinda want to write a poem about my own ancestors. But most of them were either drunken canadian fishermen or pretentious french academics... eh, never mind, I don't want to write about that. I'll just read yours one more time.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you. I am sure that if we all delved back there would be many of us who would come across ancestors with deep flaws. Maybe in years to come we will be looked at in the same way. Anyway, pleased you enjoyed this enough to read it twice.

[송지ፏ..]

Sounds like my childhood. My stepdad was an alcoholic and made me and my sibling's lives miserable. My mother didn't care about us and drunk.

[Chris Shaw]

Sad existence for you. This was in 1910, very many years ago.

Chris

[.]

A very sweetly written poem, Christine.

It is difficult to see past the personal failures of the loved ones in our lives, especially if those failures had wide reaching consequences on those others we love. It takes a brave and forgiving heart to accept those failures, consequences and flaws and still have love in the heart for the person who inflicted the pain. I know i have experienced such an instance, and i never did give my forgiveness. Some things just cannot be undone.

You have my respect for your words here and the forgiving heart you have within. A poignant, emotional write. Well Done.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Doodley for your kind response.

Chris

[Onlyme]

Heartfelt and sincere, and so true who are we to judge, we never walked in their footsteps or lived there life. Compassionate and caring.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Dee. When I think of how they lived in comparison to how we do, I count my lucky stars. They had a hard time.

Chris

[Onlyme]

Exactly, Chris. Times back then were really brutal at times.

[Sami Khalil]

The old generation had it very hard. They suffered untold things. They went through hell and high water. I like how you put his life in a short perspective without being too judgemental. A peek through your lenses.

[Chris Shaw]

How can you pass judgement when you haven't walked in their shoes? Life was terribly hard in those days. He had a large family, a wife, children who died, one who fought in WW1, housing problems, it goes on and on. I would imagine there were many, many like him. Thank you Sami for responding. Very much appreciated.

Chris

[R J Askew]

Fascinating read. It's sometimes difficult to fully realise our ancestors' lives were as real as ours are now. Like watching old B&W newsreels. But when we do focus on those lives phps they become more than names and dates in old records.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you for your response. I don't know why it happens, but when you start to research old records, these ancestors start to take shape. You build up an image of them, understand more about their daily lives. If you are lucky you may have photos, but they become real to you and
they can penetrate your emotions.

Chris