Bridges At Breakfast

the ever widening generation gap, attempting another free verse

We debate immortality

In Frankie and Benny's 

Their likeness cast in bronze

Stares from the rear diner wall

She sips a strawberry shake

Through a barber stripe straw

He asks, "Will you immortalise me?

Will you remember me?"

"I'll preserve you in artist's paint, 

Nan can bury you in a poem"

Storm Blast gives her the eye from the kitchen

She oblivious to unwanted attention

Returns to her headphones and tupac

We slide back into easy conversation

Communication builds bridges

Narrows the generation gap

Author's Note

Any suggestions re my free verse will be appreciated. Thank you

Reviews

[M. J. Smith]

One night, by Lake of the Ozarks, a young man came into my camp. And I offered him a cup of tea. We killed an entire pot in just such a discussion as you write about. Ah, it was a grand night. Too bad I never saw him again. Beautiful poem. Short and sweet.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you MJS for calling on this old poem and one of my first attempts at free verse. Conversations with the young, yes they can be delightful and can help you see things from a different perspective. Pleased you enjoyed this one. All good wishes.

Chris

[wordman]

i guess we all would like to be immortalized

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you for your comment

[wordman]

you`re welcome

[Delmar Cooper]

Amazingly, I think I took your point with only one Google search - that of the restaurant of which we have none in my area. Tupac and earphones I had heard of before. Small details, bumps of ignorance in an otherwise smooth road and your rendering is smooth.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Delmar

[Davidgeo]

The last two lines are wise. Unfortunately one of the features of the generation gap is a drastic shift in meaning and a revaluation of values -- and not always for the better. Todays youth speaks in the language of victim hood, race baiting, identity politics, and entitlement. Free speech is under siege by way of compelled speech and the scientific method (particularly in the social science's) is under siege by way of identity politics, even rational evidence based statements are silenced in the name of political correctness (ex. Jordan Peterson). . . it is no longer "the rising tide lifts all boats" but rather "the lowering tide brings down all boats".

I'm sorry I can't really give you any technical writing suggestions, I just don't see anything that needs improvement in that regard. You seem to be significantly better at that part than me.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you for your review.