Taking Cake and Snapshots

Taking Cake and Snapshots

A Poem by Chris Shaw

Pam in party frock takes a giant step,
lips pursed, breath ready to blast a gale.
Six candles fixed in plastic holders flicker.

I'm four, sip tea from best china,
he at three, anticipates birthday cake.
Monochrome moments caught by Kodak.

-

We arrive at diamond years,
the burnt wick of life's expectation,
drowning in melted wax.

We harness the remains of souvenirs.
Mediterranean heat in Hertfordshire,
my arms guide inside tea-rooms.

His choice home baked chocolate cake,
he lingers in the minute, savours the flavour,
unsteady hands mop scattered crumbs.

He breaks into laughter, I smile through grief,
capture him with smartphone colour,
aware time swallows fast, the last of his days.

© 2023 Chris Shaw


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Dear Chris,

Those were said to monochromatic days and yet your memories are so animated, so vibrant, they burst off the page in such wonderful colors. On the other hand, the era of smartphones feels so colorless and remote. I enjoyed these read so much today. Thank you for sharing.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Chris Shaw

1 Year Ago

Dear divya, a belated thank you. I read your lovely review a month ago but somehow missed responding.. read more
AYVID N

1 Year Ago

No worry, my friend. I'm always here and so are you. Its a blessing and you're most welcome. :)



Reviews

[send message][befriend] Subscribe
.
A lovely write that focuses on a single moment and how that moment has changed with the passing of the years. The years may wither the face and the body and the tech may advance to capture the moment in greater colour and clarity, but the moment itself remains dearly in the heart and savoured forever.

A softly written poem tinged with elements of both sadness and joy. Nice work.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This comment has been deleted by the poster.
Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

So right Doodley, a cocktail of sad and happy, and this moment, so special to me now immortalised in.. read more
i agree with Neville...nothing to improve here...a sad tale, as i read it...growing up and old with siblings and losing one...the snapshot memories of past...and the snapshot foreshadowing of a future without one of them.

beautifully written and haunting.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

Yes Jacob, you have read me well. The snapshots of our last outing out together, so precious, and I .. read more
I like your free verse style; I don't think you should change anything here. The abstract formlessness allows me to paint a more original mental picture that isn't weighed down by conventional pacing or expected word usage.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

Thank you for your kind words about my writing style and in particular your advice. Your review is a.. read more
"We arrive at diamond years,
the burnt wick of life's expectation,
drowning in melted wax."

From the monochrome moments by Kodak, to the capture of a smartphone, I was swept away by the nuance of life, and how well its pulse is beating here. I have no suggestions, other than you dabble more into free verse. I love it, Christine!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much for your praise Kelly. Praise enough to persuade me to consider dabbling again in .. read more
So much imagery in so few words. This piece is really multiple pictures in itself. Splendid!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

Pleased you enjoyed the read. Thank you for your review and I have accepted your friend request.
A most unusual and well thought out theme from then excitement of childhood birthday candles to the wick burning down as we age.
The old wonderful black and white photographs to the modern smartphone coloured ones....

A refreshing read , a wonderful idea and i loved it :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This comment has been deleted by the poster.
Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

Thank you Stella for your very kind comments. Pleased you enjoyed the read.
Stella Armour

6 Years Ago

i certainly did :)
Lifes span (almost)
Love cake > Six candles friends four and three
Baked chocolate cake > hope it has cream in
Diamond years > is that sixty?
You have time to go yet
Octo deca annum and on
Novo: centi.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

Yes diamond years are in the sixties. Plenty of time for me, but not my younger brother. Sister and .. read more
Wild Rose

6 Years Ago

I am Octo Deca Duo Portuguese for 82
Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

Pleased to meet you and thank you for becoming a friend.
[send message][befriend] Subscribe
Gee
Then one day you wake up with middle age as a bedfellow and only dust covered memories and flashbacks as reminders of time that has passed oh, so quickly.
I like this style, your style. Writing that doesn't cause me to puzzle or reach for a dictionary is a pleasure to read (when written as well as this)
Hope you are enjoying Saturday and the last of the summers Sun !!!!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Gee

6 Years Ago

sit = spit
Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

ha ha, cooking nicely then.
Gee

6 Years Ago

At present I resemble a barber's pole but I'm working on it :)
Reminisce and memories poetically encapsulated within the flow of words; tinge of sadness when we recall how fast the years have past! Love the ( - ) break to demonstrate a time scale! :-)

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Chris Shaw

6 Years Ago

Thank you Phill for your kind review.

2
next Next Page
last Last Page
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

1005 Views
20 Reviews
Rating
Added on April 21, 2018
Last Updated on March 16, 2023

Author

Chris Shaw
Chris Shaw

Berkshire, United Kingdom



About
Albert, my paternal grandfather introduced me to Tennyson when I was nine. I have loved poetry ever since but did not attempt writing a single piece until I was 40. It's never too late to try somethin.. more..

Writing
Slipway Slipway

A Poem by Chris Shaw


Gone Gone

A Poem by Chris Shaw



Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..