At the end there I thought of another word that rhymes with spit that would fit as well but I think I will keep it to myself. Very sad Chris and the saddest part is, it is true. I don't believe any mother gives birth to a child with the thought they will end up homeless, but maybe I am wrong. I love the title of this as well, Very cool.
Posted 1 Year Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
1 Year Ago
Thank you so much will for your thoughtful review. I know full well the word you were thinking of an.. read moreThank you so much will for your thoughtful review. I know full well the word you were thinking of and I was sorely tempted to use it! So many homeless and for a multitude of reasons. It is shameful in my opinion. This is an old poem so I am more then grateful it has had an airing. Have a good day.
A sad poem with some very nice phrasing and rhyming. Not sure it's about 'faces not fitting'; life simply has no real pattern and is often inexplicable and ineqitable.
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Thank you John, people are homeless for a myriad of different reasons. In an equal society maybe eve.. read moreThank you John, people are homeless for a myriad of different reasons. In an equal society maybe everyone's face would fit. Good morning to you.
Morning Chris. I met a homeless man by the canal in Oxford once and he was a happy bunny with his li.. read moreMorning Chris. I met a homeless man by the canal in Oxford once and he was a happy bunny with his life drifting from place to place. He was on his way to the Edinburogh Festival. He had pot noodle and instant coffee and when I offerd to buy him lunch he told me 'No thank you I am happy with what I have'.
5 Years Ago
Years ago we had Lenny who lived under Cow Lane Bridge in Reading, he was similar. Content with what.. read moreYears ago we had Lenny who lived under Cow Lane Bridge in Reading, he was similar. Content with what he had and didn't want to be housed. He stayed that way till some b******s set fire to his makeshift home and he died. Many have mental health problems, but some have been evicted from homes because they have lost jobs and couldn't afford to pay their rent. Whatever the reason, it is a scandal when we choose to house some in preference to others, and I won't go further than that or I'll wind myself up like a corkscrew :)
5 Years Ago
Having worked in mental health all of my career I can relate to this. I remember that when I was in .. read moreHaving worked in mental health all of my career I can relate to this. I remember that when I was in Epson out catchment was parts of cetntral London and the police would often fetch us homless people simply to get them out of public view. They themselves preferred to live alone and isolated on the road to avoid ridicule and friction in their local communities.
The lone bird is an interesting, though apt, symbol for the homeless. Though not as frequently as in times past, I still see them in my area. In a lean time in my past it could have been me.
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Thank you John. We should never lose sight of the fact, that it could be us or our dear ones.
.. read moreThank you John. We should never lose sight of the fact, that it could be us or our dear ones.
There's a lot of truth in this, Chris. People are homeless in the U.S for many reasons including mental instability. Perhaps there's icy darkness inside their minds as well that no one wants to deal with.
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Thank you Tim. We have many homeless here too and for a myriad of reasons. It is a national scandal .. read moreThank you Tim. We have many homeless here too and for a myriad of reasons. It is a national scandal that we can't house our own whole we give billions away elsewhere.
Wow! I enjoyed this piece! Well written. I love the flow and the depth! Love the last part!
Tabby
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
It is lovely to have a visit from a new face Tabby Mac. You are most welcome here. All good wishes.<.. read moreIt is lovely to have a visit from a new face Tabby Mac. You are most welcome here. All good wishes.
Not sure the last three lines are true in today's world. At least in the USA, I think the color of one's skin matters less than it did 50 or 75 years ago. Homeless people come from all races, all religions. Professional people come from all races and religions as well. Having said that, your compassion for those less fortunate comes through loud and clear in this well written poem. Lydi**
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Many thanks Lydi**. Always interesting to hear where my words take my readers and a pleasure to have.. read moreMany thanks Lydi**. Always interesting to hear where my words take my readers and a pleasure to have you visit. All good wishes.
Lovely poem as Always dear Chris. I loved a the visual imagery that was there and the sophisticated style of description of various scenes. I also liked these lines a lot-
The others have flown.
Perhaps they've migrated
And left it alone?
Very nice poem 👍
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Many thanks Anjeline, an older poem I decided to give an airing. Pleased you enjoyed the read. .. read moreMany thanks Anjeline, an older poem I decided to give an airing. Pleased you enjoyed the read.
This is powerful Christine. the last lines speak a truth that no one wants to believe, but tis true nonetheless. The analogy with the bird is definitely bleak enough to set up the feeling. Great write!
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Thank you Crowley. This was one of my first poems on here. I decided to give it a bit of an airing. .. read moreThank you Crowley. This was one of my first poems on here. I decided to give it a bit of an airing. Pleased you enjoyed the read. Sadly there is truth there.
'If Your Face Doesn't Fit'
Christine Anne Shaw,
The entrance of this poem with 'in an ice splintered twilight' 'sits dark in the gloam' really gives the feeling for the whole piece. Your first stanza leads naturally into the second stanza, 'and the plight of the homeless' and forgotten at night,' so naturally. Completing the awareness in third stanza, 'I ponder the faces' of the mothers who birthed,' the ones who have nothing' on this cold planet earth.'
A poem to remind that, as the saying goes...'There but for the grace of God go I."
Kathy
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
How very well you have summed my poem up Kathy. Any one of us could have a down turn in luck and end.. read moreHow very well you have summed my poem up Kathy. Any one of us could have a down turn in luck and end up on the streets. Thank you for your visit.
The title. How unique! It reeled me in. Love the use of gloam to keep your rhyme scheme.
I agree. Beauty puts many on a path to success; while beauty within is neglected.
It’s sad to think there have been so many put on the streets who arewere (I’m sure) much better humans than people who were successful, but had ugly character.
Great topic. Great finish.
Enjoyed it.
Posted 6 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
6 Years Ago
Thank you. Yes, a bird on a wire, got this poem going.
Albert, my paternal grandfather introduced me to Tennyson when I was nine. I have loved poetry ever since but did not attempt writing a single piece until I was 40. It's never too late to try somethin.. more..