Mist, Ice, and Rain- Chapter 2

"Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!" Will Maynard yelled as he shook his sister awake. "It's time for you to finally get out of my life!"

It was move-in day at Marean.

Misty fluttered her eyes open to see her thirteen year old brother staring at her. While he was joking, she could see an ounce of hurt in his eyes. They adored one another and knew that they would miss each other while Misty was at school.

"Are you excited?" Will asked as he pulled the covers off of his half-asleep sister.

"I guess so," she replied, rubbing the sleep from her eyes before crawling out of bed.

She looked at the clock and saw that it read “5am”. She groaned before ripping the scrunchie out of her hair to free her messy bun. She shuffled to the hotel bathroom and splashed some water on her face before getting ready for one of the biggest days of her life.

Since she was on the highest floor of her dorm, she had to move-in first at 6am. Misty normally didn't mind early mornings, but she didn't get a good night's sleep. She stayed up tossing and turning, both anxiously awaiting the next morning and worrying about being on her own for the first time. She loved her family and the thought of them staying in Tennessee while she lived in South Carolina was bothering her.

She put in her favorite pair of jean shorts, ones that were perfectly distressed and worn-in just right. She grabbed a lilac blouse with cream lace accents and slipped on her brown Birkenstocks.

Finally, she put on her favorite piece of jewelry. The ring was given to her by her mother on her sixteenth birthday. A princess-cut amethyst sat surrounded by six small diamonds in a white gold band. Amethyst was her birthstone and purple her favorite color. The ring reminded her of that special day with her friends and family. She was the amethyst and the diamonds were the ones that she loved unconditionally.

"Are you ready to go?" Her dad asked as he peaked his head into the bathroom.

Misty nodded as she glanced at her reflection one last time. Her makeup was natural but shimmery, highlighting the roundness of her face, her blemish-free skin, and her big light-blue eyes.

She put her messenger bag on her shoulder and started to walk towards the car. All of her belongings sat in her old red Ford Taurus, which she named The Tomato. She got in the driver's seat and waved to her family before driving down the street to her new home.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"I know, Grandma," Mary said as she was grabbing her purse from the dining room table, "I promise that I will call every night and come to church with you every Sunday morning."

"I love you, Mary," the frail woman said, placing a hand on her granddaughter's face. "And I will miss you. Your mother and father are so proud of you. I know they are."

"Thank you," Mary said softly, pulling her grandmother into a hug. While she could be demanding at times, Mary's grandmother was all that she had left.

"Promise me one more thing," she said, placing her hands on Mary's shoulders. "Promise me that you will try to be nice to your sister. She is still hurting, too. You need each other."

Mary closed her eyes and turned away.

Kim Larson was behind the wheel when their family car ran off the road and slid into a line of trees. She had just gotten her learner's permit. Their parents were killed instantly.

Mary grabbed her purse before kissing her grandmother goodbye and getting in her old silver Buick. She looked in the rearview mirror and noticed her pearl earrings. She wore them everyday, but they caught her eye that morning. She had just gotten them in May on the fifth anniversary of her parent's death. Her mother wore the earrings on her wedding day. Pearl was Mary's birthstone and she truly cherished the earrings. It made her feel like her mother was always with her.

It was a fifteen minute drive to Marean and Mary sobbed for the entirety of it.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm so excited!" Carla exclaimed as Amy handed her a grande iced coffee.

"For your coffee?" Amy asked as she pulled out of the drive-through in her black Range Rover. "Because me, too."

She took a long sip of the black iced coffee before setting it in a cup holder.

"No, AA," Carla said while rolling her eyes. "This is arguably one of the most important days of your life. This is a fresh start for you. You will make so many friends and memories."

"This is freshman move-in day, not a Hallmark movie," Amy groaned as she drove toward the university. "It's not going to be as magical as everyone makes it sound."

She absentmindedly played with her necklace as she stopped at a red light. Carla had given her the citrine necklace for Christmas. Amy was thirteen and it was the first Christmas that both of her parents couldn't make. Her father was negotiating a major real estate deal in Tokyo while her mother was in Milan for a fashion show. Her and Carla sat alone in the luxurious Manhattan penthouse, eating cookies and reminiscing. Amy cherished the necklace, with the citrine birthstone cut into a square and attached to a silver chain.

"You can make it as magical as you want it to be," Carla said, sipping her iced coffee and snapping Amy back to reality.

"In that case, I am going to need a lot more coffee."

~~~~~~~~~~~

Misty walked through the front doors of Anderson Hall, the co-Ed dorm on the eastern tip of Marean's campus. It was the oldest dorms on campus but one of the nicest. The dorm was right next to the beach, but far from the rest of the buildings. All of the students had been given their dorm assignments and move-in times at the beginning of orientation week, but the specific room and roommates were kept a secret until the morning of move-in.

"Hi, my name is Misty Maynard," she told the brunette young woman working behind the desk in the lobby. She seemed to be the first one there, which was a surprise considering she is notoriously late.

The brunette reached under the desk and pulled out a Manila file with Misty's name on it.

"You will be in room 827," she said with a smile as she opened the folder on the desk. "It is a large corner room that you will share with two other girls. You will meet them when they arrive in the room. I will be your resident advisor this year. My name is Rachel, by the way."

"It's nice to meet you," Misty said, smiling and shaking her hand.

"I just need to see your student ID card to give you your key and you will be all set. Welcome to Old Andy!"

After getting her keys, she walked out to her car to start unloading her things.

"It's about time y'all showed up!" Misty called to her family as they pulled up in front of the dorm.

"Traffic was a nightmare and we got stopped at every red light." Her mother shouted as they got out of the family SUV.

"I got my keys!" She said, dangling the gold keys above her head while running to her car. "Help me get my stuff out of The Tomato so we can check out the room!"

The Maynard family swarmed the little red car and started grabbing everything they could get their hands on. Surprisingly, they were able to load everything only only two luggage carts. Jo wanted her daughter to bring more clothing and furniture, but Misty only wanted to bring her art supplies. In the end, Misty packed significantly less than most of her peers.

After loading all of her belongings into the elevator and riding it up to the eighth floor, it was time to see where Misty would be living for the next eight and a half months.

"Remember," her mom started as they walked down the long hall to her room. "All dorms look awful when you first move into them. Just know that it will look better once it is decorated."

Once they got to room 827, Misty took a deep breath and unlocked the door.

"Hello?" A voice from inside called.

"Hello?" Misty responded as she slowly opened the large wooden door.

A smiling girl was standing on the opposite side of the doorway. She was of average height and her wavy light brown hair was pulled into a high and neat ponytail. She was wearing a white button down shirt with a pair of light blue seersucker shorts and gold sandals. Her bright blue eyes sparkled with her gold shimmery eyeshadow. She was wearing pearl earrings with a matching pearl necklace and bracelet.

It was the girl from the bench.

"You must be one of the roommates!" Mary happily exclaimed as she helped open the door. "My name is Mary Larson, by the way. I hope you don't mind if I took the bed next to the door. It is so nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, too!" Misty said as Mary pulled her into a friendly hug.

She looked around to examine the room. All of the beds were lofted with a desk and dresser underneath. Mary's bed, which was already decorated in mint, white, and gold, was on the same wall as the door, which was in the bottom right corner of the room. An empty bed was against the left hand wall and was close to the window. The third bed was on the right hand wall and was close to the walk-in closet in the top right corner of the room.

Misty decided that she wanted the bed near the window.

Her family started to walk in as Misty put her messenger bag on the desk.

"Mary, this is my mom, dad, and brother, Will," Misty said as her parents pulled the two luggage carts in the room.

"Nice to meet y’all!" Mary happily said as they Maynard clan crowded the small room. "Do you need any help with anything?"

"I think we are alright for now," Misty said as she started to pull the boxes off of the cart.

"I love the way you decorated your corner!" Jo exclaimed at she helped her daughter unload.

Mary's bed was covered with a white comforter. Mint and gold monogrammed pillows lined the back of the bed to turn it into a couch. Her desk was neatly organized with post it notes, a calendar, and some mint picture frames. She had a gold jewelry tree on her dresser with precisely organized necklaces and bracelets hanging from it. A mint and white chevron rug laid under a mint round chair in the bottom left corner of the room. Finally, a string of white fairy lights sparkled over her bed. Her whole corner looked straight out of a magazine.

"Thank you so much!" Mary said with delight. "I love mint and gold and white together, it's a classic combination."

"Where are you from, Mary?" Misty asked as she pulled a lavender comforter from a cardboard box.

"I'm from Moonridge, South Carolina. It's about fifteen minutes north of Marean on the coast. I live there with my grandmother but I was born in Charlotte, North Carolina. Where are y'all from?”

"I'm from Addisonville, Tennessee," she replied as she climbed on top of the lofted bed, using the windowsill as a foothold. "It's about thirty minutes south of Knoxville. I've lived there all my life."

Misty tried to put the purple fitted sheet on her bed, but with no luck.

"Let me help you," Mary said, chuckling.

Together, the two girls made her bed while the rest of her family unpacked and put away her clothes. It only took Misty about an hour to unpack and put everything away.

Her corner of the room was mostly purple, with a purple comforter and purple pillows. She hung a navy and dark purple dream catcher tapestry on the wall above her bed and covered her desk with boxes and jars of art supplies. Her dresser space had pictures of her and her friends and family as well as sketchbooks and journals. A guitar rested on a stand in the corner.

"That should do it," Misty said as she placed her blank canvases in the space between her desk and dresser.

"Hello?" A voice called from behind the door.

"Hey!" All six of the room's occupants called back as the door opened to reveal a beautiful tall redhead.

Her dark red hair was cut into a long pixie cut that framed her angular face. Her lips were full and her bright blue eyes were highlighted with smoky gray and black shadow. She was wearing a red tank top that was tucked into a pair of high waisted black leather shorts. She was wearing a pair of black leather sandals and holding a black snakeskin purse.

"You must be my roommates," Amy said as she looked around the room.

"Hi, I'm Mary," she said, coming down from her bed to give Amy a hug while trying her best not to look desperate and starstruck.

"And I'm Misty," she called as she peaked her head out from inside of the closet.

"It's so nice to meet you," Mary said as she released Amy.

"I'm Amy Aiden," she said as she waved to Tucker and Jo Maynard.

"How is it?" A voice from down the hall asked. "Is it nice? Are the girls nice?"

Carla came busting into the room with a luggage cart being pulled by each arm.

"Oh wow, big crowd," she said as she let go of the carts and adjusted her denim skirt. "My name is Carla. It is so nice to meet you all. AA, look! Your room overlooks the ocean! I'm going to go down and get the other two carts, I'll be right back."

And with that, Carla was gone as fast as she came.

"Do you need any help unpacking?" Mary asked as she looked at the stacks of black leather trunks that were neatly piled on the luggage cart.

"I'm fine," Amy replied, taking one of the trunks off of the stack to open it. "These are just all of my clothes."

One by one, she slowly unpacked her entire wardrobe and managed to cram it into both her closet and her dresser. Carla returned with all of her bedding and room decorations.

She had a red bedspread with black faux fur pillows and a black blanket. She hung black and white canvases of Paris all over her wall and filled her dresser with red and black candles. A black faux fur chair was placed next to her bed and was decorated with a bright red pillow. She put her laptop on her desk and called it a day.

"Knock knock," Rachel said as she walked through the open door. "I'm just letting y'all know that we will be having a hall meeting at 10:30 tonight. I know that it’s kind-of late, but I will be giving y'all a lot of necessary information about this year so it is extremely important that you will be there."

"Sounds good," Mary said as she adjusted her pillows for what seemed like the hundredth time.

Rachel grinned and turned on her heels to go back into the hallway.

"I guess this is it, then." Jo said as she stood from Misty's desk chair. The mother and daughter embraced before Misty hugged the rest of her family goodbye.

"Goodbye, my little Manhattan wildflower," Carla said as she kissed Amy on the cheek.

Mary couldn't help but feel an aching in her heart. She wanted what Misty and Amy had more than anything.

Carla and the Maynards said their final goodbyes before walking out the door of room 827.

The girls stared at one another blankly.

Now what?

Reviews

[emipoemi]

Amy and Carla are beginning to be my favourite characters of this story. They are so hilarious together. She definitely needs to come back, and for the most ridiculous reason, if you can come up with it. It really adds a lot to Amy's character too. They make me laugh.

Ok! This is another well structured chapter. But again, don't be too hasty and superficial with the details. It may be painstaking, but paint the picture. We also don't need all the minutiae of everything, it makes it seem like an Austere Academy of sorts. I'm referring for example for the complete detailed run-down that Rachel delivers Misty upon her introduction. We don't need minutiae in dialogue exposition (like how big the room is, when she'll meet her roommates - all that makes her appear like a Roz from Monsters Inc, and I can tell you don't want to paint her as such.....also, Mary is in the room, and there's no mention of that), such stuff can be "thought" by the charcter(s) herself (themselves). And don't be afraid to go into full POV mode. For the majority of the chapter, you're writing in Third Person Omniscient, which as I had said previously, can get really dull. Go right into the head of the characters and let us know what they're thinking - let them tell YOU what they're thinking, for it will help you better understand who they are, and where they had come from.
Every character should be distinct. So if Misty is the artist with an interest in astrology and birth symbols, then there shouldn't be any mention of Mary or Amy's birthstones or whatever until the three of them are together. Or if they are people interested in such things, it should be shown somehow in the first chapter OR in this chapter, to justify that whole aspect. Otherwise, it's just a narrator babbling about random things, which doesn't make for a good story. You always want to say the most necessary in a given situation, and save the rest for the more important times - like the birthstone factor could be touched upon during the first night alone together. You be creative. You have the story down fine. This is a good introduction, I'm just not buying many factors (another example is her family suddenly showing up to help her into her room when she had awkwardly - no hugs - said goodbye to them at the hotel). There are a number of them in and around the beginning, and Amy seems to be the realest and roundest of the bunch even though in another way, she herself is fake and flat. Again, step back, and consider everything from a point of view of an average reader (would anyone understand what's going on? where everything is? why things are happening the way they do - why Mary decides to keep it together when Amy walks in? Why she even considers her grandmother to be the only things she has left when she also has her sister, Kim?). Certain lines may appear strong powerful, but the question is always do they work.

I would suggest you put the "pen" down, and to some reading, because reading would help you evolve as a writer. You can read anyone's work, provided it's a book or short story (I have a couple of them posted onto my page, if you'd like to take a look). There are two superb writers that I'm helping with their novels who might help you out in terms of how to go about the craft: Natalie Dunning ("Value of Innocence") and J.L.Q (Bright: Indigo Girl). Observe how they maneuver their plots and characters, and allow that to affect the way you create your world and develop your characters.

If you have any questions about anything, don't hesitate to ask, I'm always glad to help and guide, and all this is not to say you're terrible at all - at all! You do have a talent and a great imagination (and flair for characters). You simply need to hone your craft.

Good start! Good luck!