Awake Till' The Morning Hours

Another old high school fueled by insomnia and boredom.

I lay awake for hours, thoughts racing through my head.
Trying to remember the last words, out loud that I said.
My vision is blurred just like my hearing is impaired.
I had the entire night to mold but I just sat there and stared.
Stared into nothing as the cool breeze hits me from behind.
Can there be more to life or a higher power above mankind?
Tell me who put these thoughts inside my head?
Instead I'm trapped with these lies I've been fed.
In this meaningless life that I've led, so fucked up in the head.
You never listened to a word I said, and you never will until I'm dead.
When that day comes, will I be remembered or forgotten?
The real question is, what's holding me back and keeping me stopping.
I would have to say my family and friends along with the girl I haven't met.
Then again maybe I have met her, but as of now... nothing is set.
I watch this cat as I'm envious with joy.
Fighting with a shoelace as if it were a toy.
Do cats get happy and sad?
Do they get angry and mad?
Oh what's the difference, nobody is listening, nobody cares.
And for those who've tried, they sat there with blank stares.
I commend them for their heart had been in the right place.
But they never spoke up so those memories I must erase.
They never happened, they were never meant to be.
To never be told or seen, at least not by you or me.

The countdown begins,
in which nobody wins.
Forgive me for the sins.
mix the outs with the in's.

Writing is my fantasy world as I am mutant possessing super powers.
Whilst in reality I am just some tortured soul awake till the morning hours.
I look at the clock as it says Twelve... One... Two... oh no, what do I do?
Three... Four... Five... it's been five hours, I'm trying to determine if I'm still alive.
Six... Seven... Eight...I've bitten off more than I can chew and overfilled my plate.
Nine... Ten... Eleven... blew out my brains but they forgot to send me to heaven.