Song

I've tried writing a song before.. They usually don't turn out well since I have no musical talent with instruments... However I do like some lyrics I come up with...This is a work in progress.

So when I start to bleed,
hidden beneath my sleeve,
walk behind me, let me lead,
maybe then you'll see, the knives no yet retrieved

Author's Note

I was thinking of something like this for the chorus... Not sure yet let me know what you think.

Reviews

[A. Amos]

This is strong start and looking forward to hear the song in his full glory...

[Horizons]

Yeh, it could be a nice chorus but only in a very sentimental song. It's a very great chorus you made. It's shown only the pain and the pain. A dreadful situation comes from here and how the life can be spoil from here you've well defined. Wee structured write.

[Coyote Poetry]

Strong statements create a sad vision. When we bleed. Most of hide the pain and the blood. A powerful ending to a excellent poem.
Coyote

[Chris]

To work by being repeated... will require some strong main lyrics...

Chris

[Judy Ponceby]

tragic, well written, flows well. waiting to read more :)

[deeps]

I enjoyed this, very nicely done.