Please?

I really don't know what was going on in my mind when I wrote this. My friend called it a free verse poem.. (: call it what you want I guess. (:

Open your eyes ignite the sun.
Mommy's talking so don't interrupt.
Brush your face be a good little child.
Hold my hand and cross the street.
Close your eyes put out the fire.
Dream a nightmare or two.
 Cry in your sleep.   
Learn equations you'll never use.
Letters and numbers what a drag.
Sleep-a-saurus.
Head to the desk.
Slap with a ruler.
What a ____.
Don't have a car so take the bus.
Throw your books out the window.
Wallet in your pocet.
Dear diary this.
I want them to love me.
They don't know how I feel.
Lets keep this in a jelly jar.
So it wont spoil.
Spread on bread.
Keep in tupaware for later.
End transmition.
Switch to third gear.
Put it in park.
Watch the moon.
Wish you had someone with you.
Take that laso of yours and bring it to you.
Hold onto your ray of sunshine.
Dont let go.
Red wire.
Blue wire.
Lather.
Rinse.
Repeat.
Save your life or your cat's?
Rhyming becomes overrated.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Many directions you went in this poem. So many decision and things to think about in a life.
Dear diary this.
"I want them to love me.
They don't know how I feel.
Lets keep this in a jelly jar.
So it wont spoil.
Spread on bread."
In the end. I believe be kind and help the people you can and love. A excellent poem. Good use of words.
Coyote

[Chris]

such a kaleidoscope we are... in every eye...

[Jules]

i love my PeachSoda.

[Alexander Wilcox]

Free verse or stop line poetry...my favorite! I believe that as you stated, "rhyming becomes overrated". If we are to follow simple little limericks and cutesy little discrepancies that try to bear the load that our lives present us, we fail miserably and even the darkest, most sadistic of our thoughts can be misguided onto a page of paper that ultimately becomes worthless and meaningless; even in our own minds. What you have written here is stunning and in my opinion your best work (I am sorry if you do not agree), and in an attempt to chronicle your confusion towards life you have created something that not only reads, but it speaks; it reeks of your mind. It is in its own essence, this poem is you, and it reveals a naked look at the soul that resides in your chest.

My vain attempt at understanding something :)

[Sseoni]

Nice poem! It was creative and wonderful! I loved it! Fantastic poem! :D

[deeps]

I liked this one alot,
the style and creativity in all.
Well written

[V. Lucien Maier]

very random, but the language is linked together well. It reads very well for having no apparent link or purpose.

[Queen Jummarrium]

wow, that was really good. i enjoyed it.

[AnotherWriter]

i really, really like this. it think it's realistic and quite poetic, despite the non-rhyming.(: