The desire these stripes have set in me

For a while now ive been hankering after a promotion at cadets that i just cant get and its just a little poem abuot that struggle

This desperation for what i cant obtain

its not even something big

something small

but something there

something i have chased after for nearly 3 years

a small rank slide, upon my shoulder

in fancy dark blue dress

two thin chevrons to call my own

to prove my worth, and my usefulness

its not even something big

something small

but something there

something i feel i need to solve my mental anguish

a constant battle to be worthy

to earn those silver stripes

to place them neatly on my chest

and walk around with pride

its not even something big

something small

but something there

something that means something to me

means something to my mind

and alot to my ego

a reward ,a medal for my hard efforts

but unabtainable in current times

its not even something big

something small

but something there

something that i strive towards

to hold within my hands

to write within my little blue book

to make me feel like i belong

to make me feel important

Its not even something big

something small

but something there

something to give worth to my worthless self

not just another unit within rank

following the crowd

but leading it and helping it

for now i am just nothing

its not even something big

something small

but something there

something far past my ablities

a goal my hands cant clasp around

a star out of my reach

a daunting leap over a bridge

the gap and the water to deep

Mabye i should just give in

let  it float away

cause time and time again there's always something in my way

Your  just not good enough

We cant be sure

Are you really ready?

Your just not important

Something, thats all it is a little something

i cant quite have.

Author's Note

Again throw it at me.. im not one to turn down help