Harry Potter and the Endless Game of Tag.

My parody of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.

Harry Potter and the Endless Game of Tag
Written by: Liz
Spoiler Warning!!


Number four Privet Drive

Vernon:Now, today is a very important day. Today, the boss is coming over so we can majorly suck-up to him so he will give me a three cent raise. If any of you *stares pointedly at Harry* screw this up, I WILL KILL YOU ALL DEAD.
Dudley:Should I wear my,"If you give my daddy this raise, I will love you forever" look, or the,"I'm the spawn of Satan, bow down to me" look?
Vernon: OMG!! They are here!! Go away Harry!
Harry:Well, I can tell I am loved.

Harry's Room

Dobby:Ninety-nine drunk house elves jumping on the bed, ninety-nine drunk house elves!!
Harry:What do you want?
Dobby:*pulls out lightsaber* Back to Hogwarts, Harry Potter must not go.
Harry:I gotta lay off the rum.
Dobby:Dobby can't tell Harry Potter why he can't go. Just promise Dobby that you will stay here, and never leave?
Harry:Why shouldn't I go?
Dobby:Dobby can't tell you, sir.
Harry:This is like an endless game of tag. Tell me why I should stay!
Dobby:Uhm...because..your friends..hate you. O.O *millions of letters fall out of back pocket*
Harry:GIMME MY LETTERS!!
Dobby:No! *runs down stairs* *levitates pudding*
Harry:Nooooooo.....
Dobby:Tell Dobby you will stay!
Harry:Never!!
Dobby:*smashes pudding* *disappears*
Harry:Oooooh snaps.
Vernon:*death glare*


Harry:*asleep* The centaurs have my money.....My Nimbus, mine...BACK OFF...The leprachaun wants me to find his pot of gold...but I don't want to....
Ron:*comes to save him**throws a rock at his face*
Harry:*is hit in the face* Ouch!!
Ron:Me and the twins have come to save you!
Fred and George:*apparate onto Harry's ankles* Oh, wait. That's not til fifth year. Nevermind.
Vernon:*snore* OH CRAP ON TOAST!! My Harry-Potter-is-escaping senses are tingling!!! *runs into Harry's room*
Harry:*crawls out window*
Harry's butt:*is still in the window*
Dudley:There's a full moon out tonight...
Vernon:Get him!
Dudley:Ew, don't make me touch the butt!
Twins:*drive away*

Burrow!

Molly:Oh my God! You guys almost gave me a heart attack!
Twins and Ron:Sorry.
Harry:Yeah. Sorry.
Molly:Don't worry Harry, dear. Now, you four, don't do anymore stupid stuff.
George:*drops flamethrower* Aww...
Ginny:*falls down stairs* Wait. That isn't til fifth year. Nevermind.
Arthur:*finally gets his lazy butt home* Hola Weasleys! Como estas?
*CRICKET CRICKET*
Arthur:Me gustan las uvas!!
*CRICKET CRICKET*
Errol:*facewindow*
Percy:Idiot.
Fred:Knock knock!
Molly:*sigh* Who's there?
Fred:Goliath.
Molly:Goliath who?
George:Goliath down, you looketh tired.
Harry:Here come the Kings of Bad Puns!! *hums patriotic theme*
Twins:*bow* A-thank you.
Molly:It's time to go to Diagon Alley!
Harry:*takes Floo Powder* Is this like...the crack of the Wizarding World?
Arthur:Heheh...*has Floo Powder on his nose*
Ron:DIAGON ALLEY!! *super duper green flames poof away powers GO!*
Harry:DIAGONALLY! *really freaked that up*
Ginny:Do either of the twins have a Super Pun that can save him?
Fred:No.
George:Sorry.

Borgin and Burkes

Harry:*flies out of fireplace* WHEE!! =D
Hand of Glory:Does this pedestal make my arm look flabby?
Harry:Erm...
Draco:Buy me stuff, Daddy! I WANNA TRANSFORMER!!
Lucius:Hello Mr.Borgin. I'm here to sell you illegal stuff because I don't want to be throw into jail!
JKR:Erm...*hides 6th book*
Cedric:She did that to me too! RUN FOR IT!
Harry:*Super duper sneaky weaky powers*
Hagrid:Harry! What are you doing down here you...dark magic...practicer...PERSON!?!?
Harry:I could ask you the same thing.
Hagrid:The school cabbages are getting eaten.
Harry: =]
Hagrid:So, I'm here to buy Flesh Eating Slug Repelant so they will live.
Harry: =[
Hermione:Harry! I'm so glad to see you! I missed you so much!! *HUGGING!!* Oh. Hi Hagrid. Yeah, whatever. Harry, everyone's looking for you! Are you alright?
Harry:I'm fine. Stop freaking, Hermione.

Flourish and Blotts

Lockhart:I am Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class. Honarary member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award! ^_________^
Hermione:*giggleblushfangirlscream*
Harry:Oh, God.
Ron:*palmface*
Arthur:NO HABLA ESPANOL! =D
Molly: LIAR! *tackles*
Mr. Granger:Look! An owl!! *clicks tongue*
Owl:Rawr. *bites finger*
Mrs. Granger:*pets owl's head*
Owl:*flies away*
Random wizard: Muggle FAIL.
Lockhart: OH MY GOD! HARRY FREAKING POTTER! *HUGGING!!*
Ron:That hug is so manly.
Lockhart:I will be the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher at...
Harry:Don't say Hogwarts...Don't say Hogwarts...
Lockhart: HOGWARTS!!
Harry:I'm not going.
Cho:*walks by* *giggle*
Ron:What were you saying, Harry?
Harry:I was saying something?

Platform 9 3/4: ten seconds left

Molly: RUN FOR IT!
Everyone but Harry and Ron:*through the barrier with them*
Harry:Lessgo. *full speed ahead**trolleywall**flips over*
Hedwig:Trauma!! Oh my God the trauma!!
Ron:*skids to a stop**falls over for no apparent reason*
Guy:What the crap do you think you are doing?
Harry: I tripped. O.O
Guy:...Kay. Carry on.
Ron:We missed the train!
Harry:Well...I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY DOBBY!! I'M NOT GOING NOW THANKS A FREAKING LOT YOU JINXED ME OR SOMETHING! "DON'T GO TO HOGWARTS! BAD CRAP WILL HAPPEN!" STUFF HAPPENED AND I'M NOT EVEN THERE YET THANKS FOR JINXING ME. *emo kid*
Everyone in station:O.O
Ron:We can take the car.
Harry: Ahh! =D

Car!!

Ron:Hey Muggles! Look at the flying car and have a heart attack!
Muggles:.....*run to police departments*
Harry:Idiot. Gosh.
Ron:I hear a train! I think we found it!
Train:CHOO CHOO!
Ron:Bless you.
Harry:*falls out of car*
Ron:TAKE MY HAND!!
Harry:You didn't wash your hands this week, did you? *climbs back in*
Ron: ^_______^
Harry:GO!!! *turns wheel*
Ron:Hey! No passenger seat driving!  I have this completely under control.
Harry:-.-

Hogwarts!

Harry:DON'T HIT THE TREE!
Ron:*hits the tree*
Harry:So he does it anyway. Learn to drive, dumb a*s.
Tree:BZAH! I SHALL KILL YOU NOW!
Hedwig:NO! Don't kill me! I have a contract with Toys R Us!  They're going to make little pink, plastic purses of me someday!  Feel free to kill them though.
Harry:Thanks a bunch.
Car:*escapes**spits out Ron and Harry*

Inside

Harry:Hey Ron! Guess what? I just remembered....I GET TO BE CRAZY THIS YEAR!!! Ahh! =D *partay*
Filch:Not if you don't survive!
*DRAMATIC MUSIC*
Ron:DUN dun duuuuun. DUH-NUH!!
Harry:Are you quite finished?
Ron:Almost. DUN DUN DUN DUN DUH-NUH!!
Harry:*taps feet on ground*
Ron: Doooone. ^__________^
Harry:Wonderful.

Some Office Or Another

Snapey-wapey-kins:EXPELL!
Harry:*le gasp*
Ron:DUH-NUH!
Snape and Harry:Finished?
Ron:Yesh. *giggle* =)
Dumbledore:Detention only.
Harry and Ron:Wewt!

Great Hall:Next Day

Ron:Well, freak, she sent me a Howler.
Howler:ROONIL WAZLIB! Wait. 6th year. Nevermind. *Caps Lock of Rage* *blows up*
Hermione:DANG that was funny.
Colin:WOAH! HARRY POTTER! *picture*
Harry:*blindness*
Ron:Let's go to Herbology.
Harry:Mkay. *gets up**walks into wall*

Herbology

Ron:Zzzz....
Sprout:Today we are going to re-pot Mandrakes.
Ron:*wakes up* I heard pot. *eyetwitch*
Harry:Nothing. Go back to sleep little druggie.
Malfoy:Awh..lookit the cute wittle Mandwake!
Mandrake:*bites finger*
Malfoy:S.O.B!

Grounds

Colin:*picture*
Harry:x.x
Liz:Get your signed photos here!
Harry:*eyetwitch*

Defense Against The Dark Arts

Lockhart:Since I'm the hotest person in the classroom, class will start now. =]
Cedric:*walks in*
All girls:Class is over!!
Lockhart:Release the pixies!!
Class:*freak out*
Hermione:IMMOBILUS!
Pixies:H8!

Quidditch Practice

Oliver:*super duper perkyness*
Rest of Team: x.x
Malfoy:*smug smirk* I'm the new Seeker.
Hermione:*super duper insult powers*
Malfoy:Yeah? Well....MUDBLOOD!!
Everyone:Oooh. Disssss.
Ron:EAT SLUGS! *barfs*
Malfoy:Haha. LAME.

Hagrid's Hut

Lockhart:By the way, Hagrid...I rock. Buy my books. =]
Hagrid:Uhm...No.
Hermione:*snifflesobcryweep*
Ron:Don't worry. I love you.
Everyone:O.O
Ron:That was supposed to stay in my thoughts....
Harry:I bet it was.
Hermione:....

Detention

Lockhart:Alright Harry. This first one is for (NAME AND ADDRESS WITHHELD).  She drew little hearts all over her letter.
Harry:What a skank.
MEANWHILE
Ron:*barf*
Filch: Do it again.
Ron:UGH.
MEANWHILE
Harry:*hears a voice*
Voice:Oh, you may not think I'm pretty...
Harry:Let's get the right talking prop in here and try that part again.
Voice:Hehe. *clears throat* Uhm...what's my line again??
Harry:*palmface*
Voice:Oh yeah! Come to me..Let me kill you..
Harry:Whawasdat?
Voice:*looks away whistling*

After Detention

Ron:You're F'ing crazy, mate.


Some Corridor

Ms.Norris:x.x


Binn's Class

Hermione:Tell us about the Chamber of Secrets.
Binns:A long, long time ago, Godric Gryffindor, Helga Hufflepuff, Rowena Ravenclaw and Salazar Slytherin built the Hogwarts we know and love. Because we have to. Now, Slytherin was a jerk, so he only wanted pure-bloods to attend here. He left because everyone hated his guts. But before he left, he created a chamber no one else knew about and guarded it with a monster. We don't know where it is or what it is so don't ask.
Hermione:Thanks....
Binns:Don't mention it. =D

Somewhere in Hogwarts

Hermione:WOAH! Polyjuice Potion!!
Harry and Ron:What the crap is that?
Hermione:It's a potion that temporarily turns you into the physical form of another. Snape was talking about it the other day. Don't you pay attention?
Harry and Ron:Nope.

!!Quidditch!!

Bludger:*bludgens*
Harry's arm:*crack*
Malfoy:*evil laugh*
Snitch:*glintglintsparkleshinegleam*
Harry:*catches*
Snitch:*caught*
Lockhart:Harry! *heroic voice* I SHALL SAVE YOU!!
Harry:Ah! No!
Lockhart:*de-bone-ifies arm* Well, uhm....as long as it doesn't hurt anymore??*gulp*
Random Slytherin:OWNED.

Hospital Wing

Madam Pomfrey:Lockhart is a freaking moron.
Everyone in room:Tell me about it.
Harry:*pukes*
Pomfrey:What did you expect? Pumpkin Juice?
Harry:Well, to tell you the truth, I was hoping for Vodka. But Pumpkin Juice is cool too. ^________^
Pomfrey:....*sprays Skele-Gro in his eyes*
Harry:AH!

Dobby:*poke*
Harry:What the crap? *falls off bed*
Liz:That's right..fall off the bed and break the other arm! Moron.
Dobby:Sorry my Bludger almost killed you.
Harry:Now, uhm, hypothetically, what would you do if you broke my arm so badly it would never be healed ever again, making me unable to write or play Quidditch or do anything, thus sending me into a spiraling depression? Hypothetically, of course.
Dobby: O.O *bows down* Dobby is not worthy. Dobby is not worthy.

Dueling Club

Lockhart:Watch as my sidekick and I-
Snape:Collegue.
Lockhart:Accomplice.
Snape:I'M GONNA KICK YOUR A*S!
Lockhart:Well, on three then. 1....2....3!
Snape:EXPELLIARMUS!!!!
Lockhart:*fail* X.X
Snape:Potter! Malfoy! Get up here and duel to the death!
Harry:O.O
Snape:Erm..I mean...duel to the...unconsiousness?
Harry:Okay.
Snape:This should be interesting.
Lockhart:1...2....
Malfoy:MIMBLEWIMBLE!!!!
Harry:Ricta....Ricklu....Pickles. O.O
Everyone:RICTUSEMPRA!!
Harry:Oh, yeah. RICTUSEMPRA!!
Malfoy:Whoa!! x.x *flies through the air* SERPENSORTIA!!!
Snakey:*hiss* Ra cha che cha chu! *goes for Justin*
Harry:Stay away from him!
Everyone:*knows secrets about him that he doesn't know*
Hermione and Ron:Harry! *drag him away*

Harry:What?
Hermione:Why didn't you tell us?
Harry:Tell you what??
Ron:How long have you known?
Harry:WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!!?
Hermione:You can talk to snakes.
Harry:Really?
Ron:Yes...
Harry:....Sweet.

Nick and Justin:*Petrified*
Harry:OHMYGOD.
Peeves:Oh. OWNED. ATTACK ATTACK!! Potter did it!
Harry:Did not!
Peeves:Like they are gonna believe you. SUCKA!
McGonagall:Potter! Come here!
Peeves:Oh, Potter, you loser, what the crap have you done? You're killing off people, you think it's funny as hell.
McGonagall:That...didn't rhyme. O.O
Harry:Gotta be all rhymey, don'tcha?
McGonagall:Yes, I do. Sherbet Lemon Drop.
Gargoyle:*taps dances out of the way*
McGonagall:Good luck Potter.
Harry:*steps onto stairs*
*Random Elevator Music Is Played*
Harry:*muttered singing*She was Cindy Crawford, Cindy Crawford, nothing rhymes with Cindy Crawford after NINE CORONAS!!!

Dumbledore's Office

Fawkes:*hiccup**bursts into flames*
Harry:O.O Wasn't expecting that.
Dumbledore:Hell Harry. I'm going to kill you.
Harry:*sigh*Must we go over this every year?
Dumbledore:....Yes. =]
Harry:Shweet.
Sorting Hat:Ooh! Ooh! Harry! Over here!
Harry:*stares*
Sorting Hat:Oh, you may not think I'm pretty...
Harry:SON OF A- Wait.  This is the right talking prop.
Hat:You should be a snakey wakey follower.
Harry:....Heh?
Hat:SLYTHERIN!! Duh! I mean, you can talk to snakes...
Harry:Does everyone know this but me?
Hat:Yup. ^____________^
Harry:Are you flammable?
Hat:Why? *shifty eyes*
Harry:*takes out lighter* Just wondering....
Hat:*spits out flame*NOOO!
Dumbledore:HARRY!
Harry:I'll get you later, hat. *evil grin*
Hat:FOR THE LOVE OF PINK FROSTED SPRINKLED DONUTS!! SOMEBODY SAVE ME!


Christmas!!!!!

Hermione:Happy Christmas! The potion is ready.
Harry and Ron:Best. Christmas. Ever.

Hermione:Drink these.*hands over bottles*
Ron:Is it an alcoholic beverage?
Hermione:No..
Ron:Then I don't want any.
Harry:Woah! New super power. FEAR ME!! I am Super Bubbly Skin Man! *Goyle face* Ew.
Hermione:You guys go. I'm gonna..uhm..stay here.*MEOW*
Ron:I wonder what happened to her..

Quest To Find The Common Room

Harry:TO THE GREAT BEYOND!! *runs*
Ron:DUDE. That's a girl's bathroom.
Malfoy:Goyle! Get away from that bathroom! Crabbe! Stop being ugly!
Ron:*grumble grumble*
All:*talk in Common Room*
Secrets:*are told*
Ron:Scar.
Harry:Hair.
Both:Uhm..Heartburn! Gotta go.
Malfoy:PEPTO BISMAL!

Bathroom

Hermione:Mreowr.
Harry:I taught I tah a puddy-tat! I did! I did! I did see a puddy-tat! ^______^
Hermione:Bite me.
Ron:Mmm kitty got claws.

Valentine's Day!

Lockhart:*Pinkness*

Dwarf:HARRY POTTER!
Harry:Oh, HELL.
Dwarf:*sits on Harry* 300 push-ups! NOW!
Harry:ONE...TWO....THREE...
Dwarf:*Chants Valentine along with counting*
Everyone:*gigglefit*

Diary Adventure:297 PUSH-UPS LATER...

Hagrid:Come on boy. Eat the cheese.
Tom:Hello, Hagrid.
Hagrid:Uh...Hi Tom. *steps in front of Aragog*
Tom:Oh, like I can't see it. It's a giant man-eating spider, like that isn't obvious?
Hagrid:Dang it. I thought I was doing a good job.
Aragog:*runs away* *Free Bird plays in background*
Rockers:*lighters*

Quidditch Game

Oliver:Fear me and my over-enthusiastic skills! What? The game's canceled? BUT THEY WERE SO AFRAID!!
Hufflepuff Team:No, we weren't.
Oliver: =[
Ron:Hermione's petrified? Well, there go my chances of pasing the second year.


The Road Less Traveled (except by them) To Hagrid's

Teachers:*on patrol*
Ron:*stubs toe* MOTHER-
Snape:*sneeze*
Harry:Nice timing Snivellus. *snort*

Hagrid:Who's there?
Ron:Ouch! *grabs eye*
Harry:What'd ee do?
Ron:He freaking poked me in the eye! *trips, falls, breaks his face*
Hagrid:Come inside! I'm going to kill you! =]
Harry:Isn't that Dumbledore's line?
Hagrid:...Noooo....=)
Ron:Happy Halloween!
Harry:....
Hagrid:....
Harry:Hi Mr. Minister of Magic!
Hagrid:Bajesus! Get inside! *push**shove*
Ron and Harry:*trip over table*
Fudge:Hello Hagrid. I'm here to suck your blood!
Hagrid:Oh, Fudge. O_O
Harry:HAHA! PUN!
Ron:*pokes Harry in eye* Now we're even!
Harry and Ron:*slappy fight*
Fudge:What's that noise? And why is the table knocked over?
Hagrid:Re-arranging furniture. Oh, and Fang has gas. Too much Mexican.
Fang:*tilts head to the side* *drools*
Fudge:Azkaban with ye, Hagrid!
Hagrid:AAAH! Oh, and follow the spiders.
Ron:Spiders? Or butterflies?
Hagrid:*sneeze*Spiders.
Harry:Well, that was inconspicuous.
Hagrid:*is taken away*
Ron:Well, let's go follow those butterflies! =)
Harry:Spiders.
Ron:Dang. =(

Ron:La la la....Ahh! Ew ew! Spider guts on meh shoe!
Harry:*tries not to laugh*
Giant Spiders:To Aragog with ye angsty pre-teens!
Aragog:Did you bring the Chinese food?
Spider with Ron:We brought something even better! FRENCH!
Harry:DUDE. We're British.
Aragog:Oh, gross. Seafood would've been better.
Spider with Harry: Yo quiero Taco Bell!
Ron and Harry:*Tummy grumble*
Aragog:ENOUGH ABOUT FOOD! RAWR! I'm going to eat yew!
Harry: But you just said...nevermind. Hagrid sent us. He needs help.
Aragog: Oh like I'm going to help you! RUN LITTLE KIDDIES!
Spiders: *attack*
Car: *Flies in for the rescue*
Ron: Woah!
Car: *flies away*

Back at the Hut

Ron: Pizza hut!?
Harry: Let's get back to the castle.

Gryffindor Boys Dormitory

Harry:*wakes up* Ron! That girl who died...haha she was in the bathroom! *Sleep*
Five Minutes Later.
Harry:*Le gasp!* What if she never left?! Moaning Myrtle.
Ron: OMG! I don't care. *sleep*

Hospital Wing

Ron: Hey Hermione.
Harry: This little piggy went to the strip club...*breaks off finger* Oh crap.
Ron: Madame Pomfrey! We need a hot glue gun!
Harry: What's this? *pulls out note*
Ron: Why is it pink?
Harry: I'm fired!? WHAT!?
Ron: Flip it over. Basilisk.
Harry: This is it. This is the monster. The chamber is in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. See we don't need Hermione. ^_____^
McGonagall: Teachers to the staff room please.
Harry and Ron: *Go to the staff room*
McGonagall: A girl has been taken to the chamber.
Flitwick: Who?
McGonagall: Ginny Weasley.
Ron: *Passes out*
Snape: *tried not to laugh*
Lockhart: *skips in* What'd I miss?
Teachers:-.- Get in the chamber now.
Lockhart: I sha'll go pack...I mean get ready.

Lockhart's Office

Harry: We know where the chamber is.
Lockhart: Yeah? Me too. It's up your-
Ron: It's in an out of order bathroom.

Moaning Myrtle's Bathroom

Harry: Open! *chamber opens*
Myrtle: If you die down there, you're welcome to share my toliet. We can do it in the U-Bend.
Lockhart: *trips* *falls down tunnel*
Harry: Oh, I'm gonna die anyway. *Goes in*

The Chamber of Secrets

Lockhart:*freaks out over the smallest things* Rock! AH! Mouse! AH!
Harry:HOLY CRAP! *pokes giant snake skin*
Lockhart:*passes out*
Ron:*covers eyes*If I can't see it, it can't see me.
Lockhart:HAHAHA! OBLIVIATE!
Tunnel:*collapses*
Harry:I am coincidentally stuck on the other side! Be back in an hour. If not, run in random geometric shapes, screaming like a little girl.
Ron:Can do.
Lockhart:2+2=fish!

The ACTUAL Chamber

Harry:Ack! Snake puke! WOAH! Ginny!
Riddle:She won't wake. But for $12.50 you can send her a telopathic message.
Harry:RIP-OFF! Why won't she wake?
Riddle:Her soul is mine. *dramatic music* All year, little Ginny has been doing me a little favor and setting the basilisk on those students. And in return, I'ver been doing her homework. That's why she's been passing. ^____________^
Harry:Can I just beat you know and get it over with?
Riddle:I guess. But you owe me ten bucks.
Harry:Why?
Riddle:I wanna buy a Transformer. =)
Harry:Fawkes! You brought me a hat...and a sword...What am I going to do with this?? Play dress-up and cut myself? Dang, I didn't realize how much Dumbledore SUCKED.
Riddle:Speak to me Slytherin, greatest of the Hogwarts floor. Floor? What the crap? OH. Four. Crappy Latin text translator...
Basilisk:Whee! *slides out of tunnel*
Harry:Ah! *trip*
Fawkes:That's right. Fall, then die. *gauges out basilisk's eyes*
Harry:*runs in circles for five minutes* Hey Tom! Riddle me this! *stabs basilisk and diary*
Tom:LAME LINE.  That one's even worse than the last line of the first one!
Harry:I'm gonna die. Wah.
Fawkes:*heals*
Harry:Whee!
Ginny:I swear I didn't mean to!
Harry:Don't worry. It's all over now. It's just a memory.

Not The Chamber But Still In The Chamber

Ron:Ginny! Harry! You're safe!
Ginny:Well, duh. We're two main characters. Do you really expect us to die in book two?
Harry:Read any book. Watch any movie. We won't die til the last one.
Lockhart:AVACADO!
Harry:Let's leave.
Fawkes:*rocks*

Dumbledore's Office

Malfoy: <.< This is my happy face, I swear.
Dumbledore:Let's have a feast. Feasts always fix everything. ^_________________^
Dooby:Slime and blood covered socks! MASTER, YOU DO CARE!! *HUGGING!!* I'M FREE!!!! *CAPS LOCK OF JOY*
Harry:Heheh.

Feast

Hermione:*runs in* YOU SOLVED IT YOU SOLVED- *trips, falls**gets up**runs* YOU SOLVED IT!!
Harry:xD *hugs*
Ron:*handshake*
HG/RW shippers:LAME.
Harry:Hagrid's back!! I'll begin the classic slow clap that turns into tremendous applause. *claps slowly*
Everyone:*clasp**tremendous applause*
Fans:Oh, well. We're used to the lame endings. Don't sweat it, Chris Columbus.

THE END.

Author's Note

Excuse the horrible puns.

Reviews

[Potions Master Severus ..]

XD Ohhhh divinities I couldn't stop laughing! This was bloody brilliant and amazing and I loved every single bad pun!! I couldn't stop laughing the whole first scene with the Dursleys because really that's what just about everyone was thinking the whole entire time you were reading the book/seeing the movie and it was just was hilarious to hear your own thoughts on paper sometimes. I also laughed especially hard in the Borgin and Burkes scene where JKR hides the 6th book and Cedric comes out of nowhere and says "She did that too me too! RUN FOR IT!!" Reminded me of how Stan Lee always makes an appearance in the marvel films. Which by the way, adored the Spiderman reference that Veron said. (Huge Spidey fan) Oh thank you so, so, SO much for this. Thank you for sharing your art with the world, I will definitely be looking at your other stuff.

[Maxine]

I think its really funny and sarcastic! ^-^

[Secret_Passion]

this is soo funny =)

[amailleia]

*sighs in bliss* Do more of these, they entertain me.

[Lina Lynn]

Ahh I love these. They bring back wonderful memories of our complete idiocy. And current idiocy :D