Shadowed Hero

Determined she is to fight her fate
To keep away the thoughts she hates
They fly at her, these shadowy things
Snapping sharp teeth and beating dark wings

She swings her sharp sword through the cold, frigid air
As she tries to send these things back to their lair
But the memories surge, growing in strength and number
They attack all at once as they come to confront her

Each time she cuts through one a thought is released
A memory so poignant, she falls to her knees
They wrap all around her, paralyzing her soul
Reminding her of the sweet life that they stole

With her last burst of strength, she tears one shadow down
Then, dropping her sword, she falls back to the ground
The shadowy thoughts settle over their prey
For they knew from the start that they would have their way

Then out of the dark, arrows shoot through the sky
Sending all the dark shadows fleeing into the night
It takes just a moment to regain her composure
Before she stands up to greet this strange new savior

Her eyes open wide as she looks at his face
She was sure all her problems had just been erased
Though the memories vanished, she steps back and she falls
For in her sweet savior is the worst one of all

Author's Note

Sometimes the rescuer, while with no mal intent, is not the best person to do the rescuing.

Reviews

[Haifa]

I like what you have written.. hero.. sword.. just like a historic poem something like that. I only can say you are very great poet. Well done

[Lexi Nicole]

Awesome work! So well written, with a perfect flow and great vocabulary and...Just wow. This is so perfect. I'm in love with it!

[HorrorMaster]

Amazing hero poem. :)

[Chantel]

This is awesome. Good word flow, good imagery, and a very true point. I love it. Keep writing! :)

[James Watts]

This is excellent. The wording, the flow, the intensity of the emotions, all very well written. I think this will be added to my favs. Excellent work.

[Senseless whatever]

Excellent write. Great descriptions great flow. The ending is just fantastic. A shot to the heart!

[zombiikillah666]

this is really good . i like it.

[Tina Kline]

Wow! This is very impressive! I think you used outstanding imagery in describing the inner battle that she is going through and then the arrival of her rescuer. You did a wonderful job on this. I love it!

[Miss Coral]

"Snapping sharp teeth and beating dark wings"
I think that pulsing or throbbing would be a better world instead of "beating".

"Reminding her of the sweet life that they stole"
I think that omitting "that" would make the rhythm a bit smoother in this line.

"For in her sweet savior, is the worst one of all"
I would omit the comma.

Overall, I reallly enjoyed this piece.. flawless rhyming scheme, great word choice, an excellent topic. Another wonderful piece. Great job.

[Norma M Sutton]

Very unique look at bad memories, I like it