Chapter 1 ~ Monsters of the Mind

Seven is a cursed number. At least, it is for me. Seven is the age when they came. Who are they? They are creatures that are real but aren't. I don't know what they are, but they're there for some unknown reason. I still remember the first day I saw one of them. I was in my room, sitting on my bed reading a book. I heard someone enter my room, and I thought it was mom, so I looked up to greet her. The women standing there wasn't my mother. The woman was very pale, with long stringy hair. She looked like she just came out of a pool, and she was shivering like she has been in cold water. She had no eyes, just dark holes, crying tears of blood. I was scared, too scared to scream. I just stared at her, frozen in my spot.

 "Hello child." she said, her voice watery. I couldn't say anything, I was shaking. "What is wrong? Are you scared? Why? Are you scared of me?" She asked. Tears started rolling down my cheeks, and I closed my eyes, wishing she would leave me alone. "Please don't be scared! I'm all alone! Don't you understand? I am all by myself. I have no one. Please don't be scared!" Her voice was begging, but I couldn't force my eyes open. A whimper escaped me, ad she shrieked, "Why do you hate me? Do not hate me!" The book was ripped from my hands and a wet wind wiped my face. I screamed and started crying, my eyes still closed. I curled up in a ball, and mom came rushing in my room. She tried asking me what was wrong, but I could speak through the sobs. She took me to the doctor, and they asked questions. I tried answering some, the ones I could because I was still crying. They didn't believe me when I told them about the drowned women, they wouldn't understand for even more years.

I learned to live with the creatures. Some of them were nice and I would talk to them. I treated them as if they were real, even if know one else could see them. I even made a good friend, Devon. Devon had a pale gray skin, purple eyes, and spiked silver hair, and worse a dark blue cloak. I met him when I was ten, when I was walking home from school. A pack of hell hounds attacked me and I couldn't defend myself. Hell hounds were as big as a bull, and had long silver claws and teeth, with glowing red eyes. I was sure that I would die, if it wasn't for Devon. He came out of the shadows, and chased the hell hounds away. "Thank you. I'm Nisha, what's your name?” I asked him when the hounds left. "Hello Nisha, and your welcome. I'm Devon." We been friends since, it was like having a brother.

He tried to explain who he was and the other creatures were, but I couldn't understand.  Something about the mind, creating something there so it can become real, but it was impossible for me to understand. So instead of teaching me about why they're there, he taught me how to defend myself. "Remember, that take root in your mind so the can cause damage. You just have to think of something to fight them off with. A shield or something sharp to cut the root. You just need to learn how to use your mind." I wasn’t as good as Devon, but I was able to defend myself against the smaller creatures.

When I was fourteen, I noticed that the creatures were getting more aggressive. They were shattering windows, making huge crakes in the road, and they even killed my cat. "What's going on Devon? Why are they destroying everything?" I asked as I buried my cat in the backyard. "It's because of you. Your power is growing stronger, and they feel threaten. They want you to be scared so you won't challenge them." He answered. My parents still didn’t know about the creatures I saw, and they thought a human was causing all the destruction. That changed one night, the night when they took me to the doctor and I had to tell them.

We were Watching TV, my parents, Devon, and me, when a Shadow dragon lurked into the room. Shadow dragons have misty bodies, and float without the need for wings. They had silver eyes, and red teeth, and it was hard to fight them. I stared at the dragon, even Devon had trouble fighting these creatures. I glanced at Devon, he was tense and scared. What was going to happen? The dragon turned to stare his silver eyes at me, and grinned. He shot at the TV making it explode, and then recoiled to spring back at my mom. "Watch out!" I screamed, dragging mom down to the floor. The dragon charged and hit the hall, only pulling out a chunk of mom's hair. He put a large dent in the wall, and turned to smoke. My parents were confused on how I knew that would happen and they took me to the doctors. I told them the story, Devon helping explain, and they titled me as mentally ill. I had an illness, and was told to be kept an eye on. Now, they were going to watch me carefully to see when I talk to nothing. Now there going to see what I do when everything gets randomly destroyed. Save the lives of many but look crazy, or let the ones I love die. What am I going to do?

Author's Note

My spell cheek isn't working, and I can't spell to save my life. And I am poor with grammar.

Reviews

[O. Ragnarok]

I love the concept here. The spellcheck/grammar stuff is all pretty obvious, though. You should re-post this when you get it fixed. You have a great story here, but those errors are really bad.
Aside from those, there was also a really bad repitition towards the beginning. I can't seem to find it now, but it was there.
One last thing I'd like to suggest: Work on fight sequences. i'd like to see a massive mental duel here, with in-depth fight description.

As a closing statement: Great idea, but a little rough around the edges. With a little polish, this could be great. (And if you don' mind, I might use the base concept you have here for something else I'e been working on...)