Crystal Eyes

Crystal Eyes

A Story by Bryanna

I lay, eyes closed, breath steady, mind quiet. The grass greener than summer itself, and the birds happily singing. I let my body sink into the blades of grass, feeling the cool earth on my skin. The sun engulfs me in it's warmth, like a far away hug. Just as I feel content, as if nothing could ever compare to this feeling, the grass begins to grow. It tangles around my body, over my arms and face, legs next, torso last. Pulling me into its grasp. I sink below and my vision seems to spin. As I open my eyes I find myself in what appears to be a cross-section of a tunnel. My eyes groggy, but my mind curious beyond anything I've experienced. I brush myself off and watch as the ground above me seals back together, leaving no trace of my entrance.
A soothing voice comes from the left tunnel, the ceilings high, and the room lit wonderfully, despite there being no lanterns beyond the tunnels out. I begin to follow the sounds, careful not to disrupt the roots growing in from the walls. A blue shimmer begins to dance across the dirt walls, as if the shine of the sun off a deep blue pool. As i round the corner I hesitate for what seems like forever, but surely is only a few moments. I step into the doorway to explore what it is making the beautiful light, and music alike.  Instead, I find her.
Standing what must be ten feet tall, with a gown, and shawl billowing around her in a way that can only be described as magical. Her eyes a burning white, her facial features soft, but demanding. Her slender fingers beckon me in. I have always entertained the idea of goddesses, from the Greek mythology you learn about in school, but not once did I ever expect to encounter something so worthy of a real comparison. That is, until now.
I take a step towards her, then two, three, and so on, until i reach the middle of the room. The ceiling towers over us, in a bright golden brown light. I feel her gaze centred on me. I want to ask her name, but I am afraid of the answer.
"I have a task for you" her voice rings loud, and startles me some. Her voice dreamy, resembling an echo, as if she is speaking into my mind rather than my ears. Just as I open my mouth to reply, I am back in the grass again.

I look around, confused, was I dreaming?. Hearing my name being called from the house, I stand and shake the feeling. Walking back to the door, I've almost convinced myself it was simply a vivid dream. Until I hear the voice once more, "don't forget to return."  

© 2018 Bryanna


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This is very good Bryanna. You have a great imagination and your story begs to be continued. You make it seem almost believable. You do have a few minor slips but you can pick up these with a careful reread. (you have a few i's instead of I's, also I think shall should be shawl)
Great work,
regards,
Alan

Posted 7 Years Ago


This seems like an hallucination to me, more than a dream. A scary one at that !

Posted 7 Years Ago


You certainly paint a vivid picture, I always feel like I'm in your head with you when I read your writing. I only have some minor complaints, you have a great many uncapitalized i's when you are referring to yourself, and when you talk about the goddess's attire, you say "shall" but it should be spelled like "shawl." It through me for a mental loop when I was reading it.

Beyond that, I'm entirely curious about what task is awaiting our narrator. Happy writing, keep it up :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


Bryanna

7 Years Ago

thank you! yes this was simply a quick scribble as I had a thought in my head and didn't want it to .. read more

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Added on June 6, 2017
Last Updated on January 13, 2018

Author

Bryanna
Bryanna

B.C., Canada



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looking for an outlet for all the thoughts pilling up in my head. more..

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