The Change

A description of a new relationship allowing freedom to the soul ....

I see the face before me

And stop in sheer surprise

How quickly we'd forgotten

The tiredness in your eyes

The change in you remarkable

For now so full of fire

The mind is working brightly

You show so much desire

A vigour in your step

A smile upon your lips

A fire within your belly

A passion in your kiss

The difference so marked

From those dark Christmas days
Such pleasure now I see

In all your lovely ways

So darling we'll continue

To make you laugh much more

Together we will walk

Through that happy door

And stride away as one

Fulfilling all our dreams

For no one else will ever match

The love we share... supreme
For all our lives we'll share

The pleasure we inspire

In each of us together

Such passionate desire

 

Phil Sanders

15/7/08

 

Reviews

[Gary H]

I like this Phil. It's a very good moving on into a new life poem. There is one line however that confuses me. This is 'How quickly we'd forgotten' which I read more in the context of 'I'd forgotten' rather than 'we'. I think thisis because the words are 'you' and 'I' until around the middle part where 'we' becomes one.

[Angel's Lady]

Aw, sweet romance made ever so passionate by you, the masterful love maker and painter of love's pictures. You are truly seductive, dear Phil.

[Haruki]

How very beautiful. You're so very sweet and romantic. I loved it!

[Nicholas Hallows]

Very nice write Phil!... but of course it would be. :)

I especially like these lines:

The difference so marked
From those dark Christmas days
Such pleasure now I see
In all your lovely ways

I liked it because for me those 'dark days' could either be spent alone or within a relationship but unable to see the beauty in it that was originally there. But it can, and has been regained.

I enjoyed your rhyme - not just at the end of the lines but the internal rhyme too. Worked well.

Good stuff!

[Wildfleour]

All I can do is :)

[RHEA CROSLEY]

Beautiful, I always enjoy seeing true love between people blossoming. It is a wonderful sight to behold. Thanks for sharing.

[Valentine]

Phil, there are a few downs in any relationship...the best thing to do it to learn from each one..there are not many people in this world that find the love and magic you have so do all that God allows to hang on to it..God bless..Valentine

[R J Askew]

I like this, especially the first 15-20 lines. There is a balance about it, a hint of duller times as the fire dies down, and then the drama of a flare up. I read it almost as a soliloquy from someone who has sort of surprised themselves and is very pleased with the change. I find 'those dark Christmas days' more interesting than 'that happy door' as the former are more realistic for most people than the ideal. But there is nothing wrong with the odd flare up at any age. Can one live one's whole life in a state of flare up? No.

[Fran Marie]

A lovely piece wonderfully penned my friend~Fran

[Ray Hamilton]

A wonderful write
I enjoyed this, it picked me up this morning
I could feel the energy and passion in this piece
Welcome back glad you are feeling better
Ray