CHAPTER SIX - DO THE 5

Chapter 6

Survival Tip #4 – Do The 5…

 

            Wow!  We’re about to wrap this up.  It is my hope that, once these techniques are used, this survivor’s guide has made your hectic life less hectic.  If this hope is not realized, well…maybe you need to watch “Star Trek”.

 

            OK, here is the topic leading into my denouement: Do the 5, as in the 5-minutes.  You look totally confused.  Okay, folks, here is some clarification for you.  In the course of preparing to get to where you are going, it can be expected for the process to be somewhat less than spic-and-span.  Of course, it increases your feeling tired and worn out after a grueling day at work to come home to the aftermath of a “tornado” or “hurricane” that hit your living room.  Can’t flop on the bed due to your rendition of Devil’s Tower from the chaos of the sheets and comforter.  Can’t fall back on the couch due to last night’s popcorn binge while watching “The Cosby Show” reruns on “Nick at Nite” and doing the laundry.  The list of liabilities goes on and on (especially that pile of blankets and sheets that you intended to fold last night).  So, now, I bequeath you with the silver lining in the gray clouds!  Do The 5.  Still more confused than a feather in a whirlwind?  Alrighty, then.  Let us go the Explanation Expressway!

 

            Ah, so glad you arrived!  Listo?  Let’s go.  In this fast-paced society in which we live, to do anything in 5 minutes is unthinkable, virtually impossible, ain’t no way.  Not true, Bubba Lou!  In my own dibble-dabbling in such an endeavor, I discovered you can do a lot in 5 minutes.  A whole lot.  I’m talking a big mama-sized lot in 5 minutes.  By now, you’re saying, “Um, could you get on with it?”  Ok, ok, patience, my young padawans.  Observe as I bust the knowledge.  By using those aforementioned techniques you have timed yourself in the shower, made the bed, ironed clothes and eaten breakfast.  This might get you 5, 10 or 15 minutes to spare.  You’re probably afraid to sit down, thinking you’d get your “drool on” (You know, sleep?  Drooling?  Get it?).  So what doth thou doest with the bestowed extra time you possess?  Do the 5, people.  You can clean up in practically every room using The 5.  Believe me, I’ve tried this technique both at a ranch-style house with 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms and all the other rooms as well as as a 2-, 3-, and/or 4-bedroom apartment with one or two bathrooms for the last 15 years.  You’ll be amazed at the results.  OK.  I know the burning question of the hour is what can you do, doing The 5?  Thank you again for your attentive participation and astuteness.  What joy to have such a captive audience!

 

            OK, here it is:

 WHAT YOU CAN DO IN 5 MINUTES

 

 

1)      Empty one or both racks of the dishwasher.

2)      Remove a load from the dryer, put the wash in the dryer and start a new load (and please remember your sorting).

3)      Scrape clean last night’s (or last week’s) soiled dishes and organize them (Remember, soaking them overnight makes the job easier).

4)      Sweep and mop the kitchen floor (If the kitchen is huge, I can’t help ya!)

5)      Pick up in the living room.  Make sure dishes make it in the sink, clothes in the hamper, Mickey Ds makes it in the trash, the bills in…well…you decide.

6)      Make up the kid’s beds.  We know you already have your bed made, right? Of course, if the kids are still home, have THEM do it within that time frame.  Two twin beds can be done at one time unless you have fluffy pillows or stuffed animals you put on the bed for looks (can’t imagine why). 

7)      Vacuum the living room, then TV room, then dining room.  Do each room per 5-minute spurt.

8)      Wash the bathtub, then the sink.  Doing the tile and baseboards are on you.

9)      Organize the bathroom countertop so it looks “neat” when you get home.  You can put away curlers, brushes, hair clips, rubber bands, deodorant, etc., etc.

10)  Gather the trash in the house.  It saves time if you put 3 or 4 extra bags at the bottom of your trash can.

11)  Fix your lunch.  Make sure your Tupperware ® and/or Rubbermaid ® containers are strategically placed so no fumblin’ and bumblin’ has to ensue.

12)  Brush your teeth.

 

Now, don’t give me any funny looks about that last one (although they are so cute). In the “microwave” way of life, some people think they’d cut into their travel time if they tend to their oral hygiene.  To worsen the situation, they deceive themselves thinking an McDonald’s ® Extra Value Meal can disguise the halitosis horror, the tarter-covered breath.  Survey said….BUZZ!  Zero!!!!  Brush them Mother-of-Pearl-colored chompers.  5 minutes is all you need.

 

            I’m sure I’ll have more things to add on the 2^nd edition of this book (provided I had this 1^st edition published, of course), but this will wok wonders for your busy schedule and somewhat prevent you from meeting with what the “hurricane” left in the wake of its aftermath.