Trance

Trance

A Poem by Brooklyn

A magnificent game

Of follow the leader we play

What would happen

If I wandered one day?


Why are we told

Who we have to be?

Who has the right

To decide that but me?


I begin tire

Of the old course

That I’ve done

So many times before


What would happen

If I was to take a chance?

What would happen?

Would I break the trance?

© 2012 Brooklyn


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Reviews

Good construct. Although the last line throws the stanza off balance a little.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Scratch that got confused. Stick with what you've got ignore me

Posted 12 Years Ago


Ehh I highly disagree with Sophie I think you should change the last line back. I understood it and thought it made perfect sense

Posted 12 Years Ago


I love this! Except... the last line, maybe "of our endless, boring dance?" idk, just a thought.

Posted 12 Years Ago


So true haha. People need to change for the better! Break the "trance"
Too bad it'll never happen...

Posted 12 Years Ago



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5 Reviews
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Added on May 14, 2012
Last Updated on May 30, 2012

Author

Brooklyn
Brooklyn

why do you want to know?, MA



About
I'm a fourteen year old girl that is now in her freshman year of highschool. wish me luck!. I'm awful at spelling, and I need to work on "down time" in stories. I also can't seem to write one book for.. more..

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