Monster

Monster

A Poem by Brooklyn

My worst nightmare come to life

A creature with no forgiveness in its eyes

And I cannot help but to believe its lies

 

My worst enemy and my bestfriend

Knows me well enough

To lead an attack I cannot defend

 

My worst critic who knows all my faults

Who knows that I cannot shield myself against its assaults

And in my failure this monster exults

 

I see this now, though I didn’t then

This monster was never my friend

 

And now as I look in the glass

I see the monster that is looking back

 

I see the monster in my eyes

I am the monster that I now despise

 

© 2012 Brooklyn


Author's Note

Brooklyn
I don't think that it is my best but it the first poem I have written in a while. Anyway please tell me how I can improve it.

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Reviews

Amazing poem. It's thoughtful and touching..

It's, like, impossible to improve, I think. (Except "bestfriend" is two words..) Well done!

Posted 11 Years Ago


I love it, I hope you write more, I'll be reading and reviewing more
100/100

Posted 12 Years Ago


The poem is not bad. I like the surprise ending. Sometime, we are our worst enemy. It's not surprising since we are all mentally and physically deficient due to being imperfect. If we learn to control ourselves we can become the master of our universe.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Great poem - all too often the only person stopping us back in life is ourselves. Very clever writing - really enjoyed it.

Posted 12 Years Ago


This is a great poem showing how you can be your own worst enemy. I love the depth you bring to this poem. Wonderful job!

Posted 12 Years Ago


Really good!!

Posted 12 Years Ago


You are your harshest critic. Good poem :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


I like it, you dropped a drama bomb that I wasn't expecting, so that's good. Your writing's always great Brooklyn, keep it up.

Posted 12 Years Ago


I love the last stanza. You brought it up just to bring it down...one of the greatest effects in my opinion.
For a long break this is understandable for you...so naturally it's really good. You had a catchy rhythm with an easy to follow meaning and you grabbed the readers attention with ease.
I loved your idea, I just love when a battle wages inside ones self.
So all in all, great poem, great idea, great meaning, great job...as usual.
I would say "keep it up" like I usually do...but something tells me that you weren't planning on stopping..

Posted 12 Years Ago


i think this was nice .....good job

Posted 12 Years Ago



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Added on August 4, 2012
Last Updated on August 4, 2012

Author

Brooklyn
Brooklyn

why do you want to know?, MA



About
I'm a fourteen year old girl that is now in her freshman year of highschool. wish me luck!. I'm awful at spelling, and I need to work on "down time" in stories. I also can't seem to write one book for.. more..

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