Chapter 5: Studying

A Chapter by Brooke

It started out like almost any other dream -- me having a conversation of some sort with someone in my life -- but then it sorta started to morph into something else. I was laying on a plaid blanket, staring up at the stars above me, which I could see much more clearly than I would ever be able to see them in Portland. I stretched my left arm out to the side of me, trying the figure out where I was, and felt sand. Ok, so I was somewhere with sand. Then, suddenly, I knew where I was. Well not exactly, but I knew I was on a sand dune, but where in the world this sand dune was located, I hadn't a clue. When I looked to my right I saw a person, but that's all I could tell at the time, he, as I learned later, was starring at the stars, just as I had and continued to stare at them, even as I watched him. He moved, just enough so that the moon's light cast a small stretch of light across his half his face. I was taken aback by it. It extremely handsome, but not in the way that most think of when they think "handsome". He was young looking, about my age, maybe a little older; he had hair the color of my peppermint mochas from Starbucks. And his eyes, oh his eyes, they were so gorgeous. They were green, but they weren't just any green, they were the shade of green that when you roll your mouse over all the different colors, its the one that says 'green', not 'lime green', not 'mint green', or 'sea foam green', but plain out green. They were so pure and beautiful and great. I loved them. Never before had I been in love with a pair of eyes, but not the person attached to those eyes, but I guess there's a first for everything.

Then, just as I was starting to hyperventilate, the boy sat bolt upright and stared up at the silver of mon that hung over us.

"I, I, I have to go," he stammered. He scrambled to his feet pulled on a jacket and took off into the woods behind where we had, moments ago, been lying. I sat up in a crouch-like position, on my knees, and watched the trees around where he had run sway back and forth. I sat there till the trees, and everything around them became totally still and silent. And then I sat there till my knees started to hurt from sitting on them so long. From there I fell back onto the blanket and stared back up at the stars.

I closed my eyes and when I opened them light was streaming in my window that runs the top of my room. It had seemed so real. For a second I had almost forgot it had been a dream.

I rolled over and looked at the alarm clock on my bedside table -- 8:12am. Hmmm, to get up or not to get up, that is the question. I knew I wasn't going back to sleep anytime soon so I decided to get up and check on Mandie. I pushed some slippers onto my feet and walked up the stairs into the small hallway between the kitchen and the family room and turned right to go into the family room, where Mandie had slept.

I found her basically in the same place as I had left her the night before, but she had moved up the couch just a bit and curled up in the fetal position. She looked quite content, so I left her there to search for food in the kitchen. In the first cabinet I found Cheerios and decided they would suffice, so I pulled it out and poured myself a bowl. Then I went over to the fridge and grabbed the milk. Once the milk was given to all the little O's I put it back and took my bowl to the breakfast nook. I sat down in the little corner where the booth seat turns and starred out the window at the bright Sunday outside. I thought about the dream, the dream I could barely remember now, even though I was grasping onto it for dear life. I don't know why, but for some reason I felt like I had to hold onto that dream, even as I losing more and more by the second.

Mandie came in while I was deep in thought and scared me like no other.

"Hey," she said. I screamed, as she started to sit down next to me, still groggy from sleep, gasped. "What?'

"O, sorry you just scared me."

"O sorry." And our conversation drifted from there until I looked up at the clock and it was almost noon.

"O jeez," I said, "you better head home, gotta study for those finals." Mandie got that depressed look on her face that she always gets when she doesn't want to do something, but nodded and got up from the table. I walked her to the door and waited there, leaning against the door frame, until she was inside her house. Then I gently closed the door and went downstairs to do some studying of my own. I had an English, Chemistry, and Algebra II on Monday, so I decided to study for those first. But in which order should I study them? Least favorite to favorite or the other way around. I sat there for twenty minutes decided what to study for first. Finally I decided to go from favorite to least favorite. Chemistry it was then. I poured over my periodic table of elements till I thought my head would explode.

When my brain finally decided it had enough and I couldn't tell what I was looking at, I looked at the clock. It was almost four. Wow, I had studied for four hours straight; I needed a break. So, I went upstairs and grabbed a quick snack of pretzels and then went back downstairs, but instead of going back to my desk I went to my bedside table, where my laptop was sitting. I powered it up and logged on. I logged onto greyhound.com to buy my ticket to my mom's. I bought the cheapest one, the non-refundable one. After I was done with that I knew I had to get back to studying, but decided to move on from Chemistry and on to English. I curled up with my copy of Macbeth, which is basically what the final was on, so I was re-reading it and the all the spark-notes on it too. I needed to ace this final. I spent was left of the afternoon reading Macbeth and finished it around seven. And as if on cue, the second I closed my book, my stomach let out a low rumble. Food, I needed food. I went upstairs, yet again, to find something to eat. I looked in the freezer and found a single person pizza. I popped that in the oven and went into the family room to sit and wait for the pizza to finish. I flipped the TV on to see if anything was on. I flipped through all channels and found nothing that held my interest, so I turned the TV off and grabbed the latest edition of Elle that I hadn't had a chance to read yet. As I flipped through, reading about the latest fashion in Paris, the oven buzzed, signaling the completion of my pizza. So got up and went back into the kitchen to get my much needed food. I sat at the breakfast nook, eating my pizza, all alone on a Sunday night, with my feet propped up on the chair on the other side of table. An action that I would have never have gotten away with, had my dad been home.

Ten minutes later, all traces of my dinner gone, I went back downstairs and half-heatedly picked up my Algebra book, knowing I was as ready as I'd ever be for that particular final. I skimmed through the all the chapters and the back of the book, looking for anything I may have missed or not gotten -- I found none. Finally I gave up and crossed the room to flick my bedroom light off. I crawled into bed, switched my bedside light off and covered myself in the many layers that make up my bedding. I slept peacefully that night, not a signal dream crossed my mind, though when I woke the dream I had had the night before was fresh in my memory. I grasped to grab hold of it, but lost it again. What had that been about? Rarely did I have dreams of people that I don't know. I suppose this person, the person in the dream, doesn't exist, but for some reason I have this feeling that he does. Exist that is.

I woke around six am and rolled out of bed, blurry-eyed and stumbling to the shower. I pulled on the different knobs, just so, as to achieve the perfect temperature to take a shower in. I pulled off my clothes and stepped into the shower. I relished in the heat and steam that surrounded me on all sides. I loved the feel of water pelleting my back like bullets and yet being oh, so relaxing at the same time. As I dragged my fingers through my hair, I thought of my long greyhound ride to Tillamook. Oh, the delight I would have as I watched the lush, green hillside that was Northwest Oregon. A soap bubble that had fallen into my eye brought me back to my senses. I quickly closed the uninfected eye and held the other, open one under the stream of water. When the stinging subsided, I finished my shower quickly and without distraction. Half opening the door of the shower, half turning the knobs that controlled the water flow, I stepped out of the shower. I covered my face in the plush of the towel and dried my face off. Continuing to dry myself off, I worked my way down my body, till every inch of me was dry. With my hair secured above my head, I walked into my room and put on underwear. I was forced to use all of the clothes I rarely wore, because all of my "normal" stuff was packed, safely in my suitcase. I dealt with a knee-length yellow skirt and I green polo I dug up from the back of my closet. After I was dressed and ready, I put a #2 pencil and my calculator into my purse and went upstairs. I got a quick bite to eat for breakfast -- a banana and a Cliff bar and was out the door.

Outside, I looked over at the driveway across the street. I was surprised to see Mandie's car gone so early, usually she didn't let till last minute, but I was even more surprised to see Scott leaning up against his car, one foot on the ground, the other on the driver side door. Scott, being a recently graduated senior, had been out of school for a few weeks and was rarely up when Mandie and I left each morning. He must have heard me close my front door because he looked up. As he met my gaze he smiled and beckoned me over. I quickly ran across the street, curious to know what he had to tell me.

"Hey," he said groggily. I could tell that his body was already accustomed to the extra few hours of sleep.

"Hey," I replied back.

"Mandie wanted me to tell you that she had to go to school early for something. She wasn't really making much sense, but she told me to tell you."

"Oh, well, thanks. I'm sorry you had to wake up so early to tell me just this little piece of information."

"It's no problem. Actually, I wanted to offer you a ride to school today. It's finals, is it not.” As he said this he took a step towards me so that I had to look up even farther.

"It is, but I think I'll be able to get my own self to school. Thanks for the offer though."

"No, really I insist." And before I could utter a word of protest, he grabbed hold of my arm and wheeled my around to the other side of the car. Once in front of the passenger side door, Scott stopped abruptly. So abruptly that I didn't time to stop and fell into his arms. He caught me in such a way that his arms were holding me up by my armpits and my arms were hanging off to the side; I looked like a rag doll. I pushed my legs up, so that my feet were on the ground. Then, I proceeded to place my hands on the bend in his elbow and push myself up. I was unsuccessful. He wrapped his arms around me and held me in such a grip that I was unable to move, and yet not squishing me.

"Scott, really. I have to go," I murmured softly.

"Ok," he replied, just as softly and slowly loosened his grip, opened my door, and went around to the other side of the car. I dropped myself into the car and closed the door behind me. "So, what finals do you have today?"

"Chemistry, English, and Algebra II." And the conversation when on like that for the rest of the car ride; there wasn't a signal mention of what had happened in my bedroom on Saturday or what had happened this morning outside the car.

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