Hell

Lost inside
Bound to hide
Soul is gone
Hell has begun

Long way home
Truth is told
Hope is feared
Hell has neared

Luck has turned
Love has burned
Flames all around
Hell surrounds

Strength turns to weak
Energy leaks
Its disbelief
Hell's a thief

Reviews

[Sexy P3nguin]

I love this.. You described hell and what it dose without being to wordy.. Not many people can do that but you did it very well

[Kimmee Jean]

okay...
this is cute.
really cute.

I personally think it is too short.
I like the idea but there is alot more you can do with this

[Tori]

Very good, my friend. I loved the way it flowed! It made me want to read it again and again!! Who knew Hell could ryhme so well? Great job! Keep up the excellent writing.

[lexiilunatic]

i love this one.

[Crisco Prisco]

wow nicely done.
I love the way you described the fear this person was feeling
and how you related it to hell.
I like the way you make everything seem hopeless and like nothing matters anymore.
Nice job

[Kim Martin]

It seems to speak of an inter fear, one real yet only within. To complement this poem, I would think of writing a poem of the fear infront of you, rather the within. Yet, the structure is well put together and can see a clear presence within the writers mind of fear and intrapment.

[Piikapoka]

I like it:DD

[~Shadow Kissed~]

i totally love this it's really great!!!!!!!! :)

[BeautifulDisaster]

Just a short poem I came up with. It's mainly about someone feeling completely lost and hopless