What You Did to Me

What did I do to deserve this
It started with one kiss leading to another kiss
I really liked you and I thought you liked me
But you had to let this end in tragedy

I did everything for you because of how I felt
I don't know what I did to you, but you made my heart melt
The laughter we had and the friendship we shared
Is now all gone because you never cared

What's the point of trying to make you happy
If all you ever did was treat me crappy
I fell for you, like I never fell before
I don't know why you did this if I left an open door

You used me like I was nothing
I thought I felt something
But now it's time to move onto someone real
I could never be with someone that made me feel the way I feel

 

Reviews

[raining]

life is a steep learning curve. but we survive and the learning helps us in getting through and seeing the sincerity (and the lies) of others. this was an honest expression and took courage to write

[Matthew Ian Herrawood W]

are these real life experiance's? these poem's are good better than mine.

[lexiilunatic]

awhh. that was very well written.
you deff. opened up and let your feelings show.
and spoke what was on your mind.

[.]

I think this poem has a lot of similarities with the other poem I reviewed. I didn't find any rhyme problems or anything like that. The "likes" in the third line do need to be changed into the past tense. A line that was interesting to me was the was the final line. What might be kind of fun for you to do is start another poem with the final line of this poem starting the new one. As the poem goes on, you give accounts of the way the character feels, showing the reader situations and actions that have spurred this emotion. I don't think you should rewrite is poem or anything, I just think It might be interesting to go down that other path, and see what other aspects are hiding in this poem here. Again, just a thought, and it might be kind of fun. That way, you are able to explore other facets that are touched on. It was a fun read.

[Stefannie]

WOW.. i could really relate to this one.. i kinda got a little teary ( Embarrassed :P) Im assuming most of these peoms are real life experience you've gone through?

I really like the way you wrote this one.. Your really good :D

[KisuKimmi]

In the third line, i think it would be better if you changed the tense of "like" into past tense, "liked" seems to fit better.

I really love it though, thats all I saw that I may want to change.

[John Stussy]

Your pain pushed you on to a more resolute path, going for what you deserve. Pain ocurs but it teaches effectively. Well done on this poem.

[A]

WOW...so sad. But I love how you ended it. Showing strength and persistence to move on to "someone real." Very well writen and great poem! :)

[John McGrael]

i really like the last two lines...
...those stood out to me as the best lines in the poem

[~Shadow Kissed~]

totally great :)