That Night

***Trigger Warning!! Child Abuse!***

Story Song(s):
• Six Feet Under by Billie Eilish
• Monsoon by Elliott
• Silence by Carlos Guevara

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“God only gives you what you’re strong enough to handle.”

That was the only thought that ran through my head as my mother’s boyfriend walked into the room. My six year old body tensed and I closed my eyes, praying that he would think I was asleep and leave. It was almost like a ritual, one that I would perform every time I heard his voice when I came home from school.

It never worked.

It was late at night, my sister, lying across the bed, was fast asleep, oblivious to the things that were going on just a mere foot away. I heard the door creep open and I silently begged him to leave. The haze of cigarette smoke began to float about the room as he took the last few drags and then put it out in the cup of Kool-aid by the bed. My heart pounded as he climbed into the bed and the tears began to fall, as they did every night his large, horrifying form pressed up against mine. My breath was slow and shaky as his own brushed over my ear, cigarettes and whiskey filling my nose and triggering my gag reflex.

“Hello, sweetheart. Are you awake? You know I like when you’re awake.” His deep, distinct voice now disturbed the silence of the dark room, sending chills down my spine. I merely nodded, eyes once again squeezed shut. His filthy hand ran down my side and my thigh. A silent sob fell from my lips, causing my body to jolt a bit.

“No, please don’t.” I whispered helplessly, shaking my head.

“Now you know what will happen if you say no. Do you really want your little sister to take your place, bunny?” He practically cooed, the smirk on his face present in his voice. His pet names made my stomach churn and I wanted nothing more than to disappear with my sister from that room, from that life. But I had no choice, disappearing wasn’t an option. He made that clear the very first time all those months ago when I tried to run and had to explain the cut lip and bruised cheekbone to my mother. In her drug-induced haze, she didn’t process what I said and simply shrugged it off, shipping my sister and me off to my father’s yet again.


I shook my head and remained quiet now as his hand snuck under my shirt and into my pajama pants like a snake slowly approaching its prey. Voiceless sobs left my lips, tears spilling down my cheeks. Would this ever end?

As his hand crept lower, my mind left that room and it was as if I had left my body, my sister and I escaping to a place much safer and full of love instead of vile cruelty. Somewhere far away, with colorful smiles and warm hugs. Where the I love you’s meant the world, and the manipulation was no where to be found.

I just had to make until morning and then maybe, just maybe, we’d be gone from this place for good.

-a memory long forgotten

Reviews

[akki]

your story is intense. a good writing

[Serendipity Planet]

I am really left speechless here
I can't really know what to say , it was hard but brave writing