Fatal Heartbreak

   I was standing there,on top of the building looking down at the cars going by. Trying not to think about what i was about to do. I didn't even know how i had gotten to this point in my life.How did I let my life get this messed up? So confused, so depressed.Nothing seems to matter anymore. I'm not good enough for anyone..so why even live?

 

   I wasn't always like this. I used to be happy. Then love left me absoulutly heartbroken, to the point where i just didn't give a damn anymore. How could i love someone so much that I would do anything for them,and yet they just put on an act to see how far i would go with them.I wanted to believe they loved me, I really truely did.

 

   It all started in December of 2008. Nobody liked him much, but i did. I saw the best in him. We started talking, and we started to get closer and closer as friends. Then one day we noticed we had feelings for each other and wanted to start a new relationship,one where we weren't just friends. December 13, that was the day we got together. Me and Payton together, just like i had wanted. It was great...for a couple months anyway.

 

   I guess i was old news to Payton after a couple months. Thats when the ignoring, and mean behavior started. I was trying to be the best girlfriend i could be, but that wasn't enough, not enough for him anyways. Times were really bad, and i started talking to Paytons friend Francis. I just needed someone to talk to, a friend. Feelings changed quickly though,and before i knew it, I had left Payton for Francis.

 

   I didn't see why i should've stayed in a relationship with Payton,when he was treating me so badly,and Francis was treating me so nicely. I stayed with Payton for four months, and the whole time I was miserable. It was the begining of April, April 18th to be exact when I had finally had enough of Payton treating me the way he did. Francis was different. I was so happy. Life couldn't get better for me. I would visit him at his house every night, and sometimes we would see each other during the day. We had the perfect relationship, and then something changed.

 

   It was August 12, when I got a text from Francis saying he didn't have time for me anymore. Just like that my world had crashd. We were over. I couldn't take it. I cried myself to sleep every night. I emailed him, texted him, I even tried tellin his mom to tell him i said hi a few times, and he wouldn't even talk to me. He refused to go anywhere he thought I would be. I didn't understand. i loved him so much and he just left and didn't care at all.

 

   Even though I had so many people that loved me, I had never felt so alone in my life. To other people I must have looked so stupid being this way because a relationship ended, but no one understood how much I loved him. I knew he wouldn't come back, and i needed something to try to take a little bit of my pain away. I actually got back with Payton. That didn't make me happy though, it only made me more upset. I didn't want anyone to find out about me and Payton though, because i disn't know how long me and him would last.

 

   In September, me and Payton went to the school carnival. While i was looking around, I saw something that I had been wanting to see for so long. Francis was what I saw. I did anything to try to get his attention, and he ignored me for awhile, but then he finally said hi and just by him saying that, it made my night. Francis started texting me and everything was great, and then his attitude changed.He was saying such hurtful things. He even had said that our relationship had meant nothing to him, and I guess thats kinda how i ended up in the position that i'm in.

 

   I took a step closer to the edge, and I see my life flash before my eyes. As I was about to jump, I heard someone calling me. Whoever it was must had seen the note i had left. I turned around, and it was my best friend Chris. Seeing her made me cry even harder than I had already been crying.

 " Chris i'm sorry. I am so sorry. I just can't live anymore."

 "Please don't do this Bri,please. Theres other ways.I'm here I can help get you through anything."

" You don't understand." I gave her a hug, turned around and walked toward the edge. I looked at my best friends face for the last time and I jumped. While I was falling, I could hear my friend screaming. I whisperd i was sorry and then my life ended.Finally I was free from my pain.