Do not admire me

She told me that she admired me

over breakfast

in some run down

mom and pop joint up in the heights

I didn't reply

just raised my eyes up

from my eggs

kept chewing

took a swallow of black coffee

grabbed a napkin from the dispenser

wiped my lips

covered the remainder of my food

like it was some sort of dead soldier

in the mist of my contemplation

eventually I looked at her

scratched my chin

put two dollars down

got up

walked out the door

leaving her at the table

just watching

I don't want to feel admiration

it gives me this sense of guilt

like I'm starving the world

or ending someone's life

I just can't wrap my brain around it

I wanted her to say that she loved me

or that she wanted to go back to the hotel

rent a movie

and start planning our future together

Instead...here I am

walking down the street

reciting my poetry to myself

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Norma J. Jessee]

A moment in time, when our heart craves one thing and we get another. A crushing moment when there just aren't any words to be said. In love, when someone loves us they accept us for what we are, but when someone admires us then we feel we have an image we have to live up to, therefore we can't be ourselves anymore we have to be what they expect us to be or see us as and sometimes thats a pretty tall order. It's also an honor to be held in such high esteem. But the two are quite different.

I love the way this told a complete thought rather than fragments that are hard to understand.
Very beautifully written.
You're a master.

[Danielle Asher]

I don't want to feel admiration

it gives me this sense of guilt

I am not sure why these two lines stuck out to me. I think it was admitting to the feelings and than it carried on from there talking about the things you did want. The way the piece is so pure, so readable- kind of like a conversation but more like hearing the things a man is thinking as he walks down the street.

Great Work!!!

peace,
d

[MrJodie]

Okay, I'm gonna use a California clich�. DUDE! There's more here than can possibly be critiqued. Your work is, to quote Kara, genius. This is poetry, pure and simple. It's a moment... baked, boiled, distilled and reduced to it's essence and then shared, just a little bit at a time, and in the right order, so that someone else FEELS it. It communicates, inspires and begs for the unanswerable to be accepted, swallowed and even enjoyed. If you've read the book "Drawing On The Right Side Of The Brain," which I recommend, you'll know what I mean when I say that you obviously SEE things around you and have the rare gift of being able to draw it out, verbally, so that others see it through your perception.

I'm thoroughly impressed.

~ Jodie

[Kara Emily Krantz]

ha!! yes yes yes. im officially happy. i can already tell that i'm going to love your work.

when i find something i truly love, i find it hard to put into words why i do.

basically because i sense genius within the lines.

and that is what i sense here. :)

very glad you're here. and i found you, so i can read you. :)