Poison Pill

 

Life keeps giving me the poison pill

Basking in sunlight on a windowsill

In a home where I belong no more

A mystery but I know what’s in store

I sense it in the gusting fall wind

The cold fall rain is aching to begin

I am aching for its chilled embrace

Ice water caress my wretched face

Frozen within to be frozen without

Even a hope of being redeemed

How I despise this endless dream

 

Another morning, a brilliant sun

Soon set aside as the fear has begun

It has sunk its teeth firmly in my skin

As it seeks to break me limb by limb

I sense it in a great eastern bluster

Remember when life had its luster

Now I’ve been left out in the cold

The end of the story has been told

All I have to do is make it to the end

Of a dire road that swallows me whole

So that I may part with my weary soul

 

I remember when

Longing for days to never end

Praying to heaven for God to send

Just a little more sunlight

A gallivanting flashlight

I could close my eyes and pretend

 

I remember when

My dreams began to shatter

The fabric faded and tattered

Until it became torn

Thoughts stillborn

Maybe none of it mattered

 

I down my poison pill with some water

Nerves become sheep going to slaughter

I feel emotion washing away from me

Panic now nothing but a receding sea

I feel it in the lights that all fade

A drag racer is always betrayed

As soon as the stoplight flashes red

Pedal to the floor, concrete and treads

Uncertain of what may be in front of me

For a moment I am unfettered and free

Speeding off into another empty night