Prologue -- Why I Left

The first question everyone's inevitably going to ask me is why I left, and I know in their minds, they'll think they already know the answer.  A few months ago, I got in some minor trouble with the law, the consequences being probation and having to reappear for a court date.  With little regard to these orders, I went about my life and so warrants were about to be made for my arrest.  So the big assumption is that I am running from the law, and in a sense, that's correct.  However, there's much deeper reasons than that.

I've had a raging, passionate wanderlust far before these troubles, as anyone who truly knows me will tell you, and I used this time as a motivator to get off my a*s and finally do the thing.  "Finding myself" and "Spirtual quest", although cliched, are terms I would assign to this "thing" I'm on.  Jack Kerouac has been a huge influence on my life as well, and after reading On the Road, I have been determined to try my hand at hitch hicking and take off across the continent in search of wild times.  But I also wanted the journey to have a spiritual undertone to it, and I had in my mind a glorified image of talking to others, finding hippie communes, drinking peyote tea, finding Buddhist temples and finding out what life is all about.

I didn't want to fall into the routine of working and finding a girl and settling down like all my peers were doing around me.  I felt I was called for something more, and I wanted to go out and see the world, or at least the American West. Its not that I don't want to work, I want to work on something that I feel is the most important thing in life, namely, my own life, without the weight of society's demands bogging me down.  I want to find truth, wisdom, love, peace, and knowledge, all the true treasures in life that I can't gain living a "normal life".

I also struggle with social anxiety, and I hoped by throwing myself out into the world I would find some courage in communicating with people and expressing myself more.  That's also a reason for this blog.

So those are the main reasons I'm out here doing what I'm doing.  I guess its a bit selfish and should be facing my punishments and what not, and not everyone's going to agree with this, but there it is.