Oh, and I'm just waiting til the shine wears off

Thoughts.

I've been feeling especially creative lately. It's hard to act on it the way I want to, but I am trying. And though Master Yoda says that there is no trying, only doing, I don't give a f**k quite that much and I continue to do what I do best, which is to try.

I was watching this documentary on JK Rowling the other day about her life within the year she was writing the final book in the Harry Potter series, and she said something that really inspired me. She said that all of her life, she never stopped trying, no matter what she was going through- her s****y marriage, her life of poverty, her struggles with being a single mother while battling a serious depression... She was a natural born tryer. I couldn't help but feel a swell of emotion in my chest, a flutter in my heart. How could I possibly love her any more than I already did? She was the woman who pretty much saved my childhood, my life, with that damn series. She was the woman who helped me escape into a world that taught me what truly mattered in life- love over anything, and that good always triumphs over evil. 

Anyways, I've been going through a lot lately and I've been thinking more and more about art. About how I know creating art, creating anything, will help me get through. I'm not at liberty to discuss (just yet) what's been going on, but let's just say, it's got to deal with me confronting some major issues in my life, including things I've had to deal with in my past. 

I've been reading Alex Grey's novel "The Mission of Art" and it's really been making me think about the creative spirit that runs through me, and the studio within my soul, where all original art comes from. I've been thinking and thinking and thinking- what makes my art, my art? What can I create that touches others, that I have personally created? What kind of art can I create that symbolizes me? 

I'm still not sure, but I am trying. I know I'll get there...