Irish Sea of Sand

An interpretation for your mind to take in. Meant to be of imagination, lust and love.

 His beautiful face showed me a light,

A beauty of heaven and dreams so bright.

He came upon a blanket of stars,

Yet he shown with grace -- from Mars?

 

His eyes were of the Irish Sea,

O' that he had somehow found me.

He 'or watched my dancing charades.

I thought about asking him to join these escapades.

 

Hair of the wheat, when harvest has come,

He bedazzled my heart -- a triumph he'd won.

I gave him my heart as we walked hand in hand,

Along the shores of the Irish Sea -- two bodies, love on the sand.

Author's Note

Please give opinions. I love constructive criticism, but please don't be too harsh on my first piece please! Thank you!

Reviews

[Wicahpi]

I'm thinking over all it's a fine write of emotion.
Starstruck by someone; you express it well.
I do, however, feel that the first stanza seems a tad forced;
especially the last line. I love the visual of 'eye' the color of
the 'irish sea'. We all have to start somewhere and this is
a good beginning. Thank you for sharing.

[yellowsparrow]

Love it! Second stanza is beautiful

[Michael X]

Very nice job, the transporting effect is visual, as the emotional context connects the reader with the imagery in a celestial, dreaming way of thought.
you have talent, keep it up.

[Dark Twain]

This is so visual, I want to read more like this.

[Savannah]

I really like this, especially the last stanza. I like the story it tells. I also like that your use of a question mark, I feel like I don't see that in poems too often, and it fits.

[Jujubee_:]]

wow..its very beautiful. I love this. I could picture everything in my head. keep writing

[melissa]

this is pretty good for your first piece great job! the words flowed good, good detail.
:)