Perfect dream of hell.

well im not really into going to hell, but some peoples minds are so ackward and strange, unique also, but this is really about a man who dreams of hell and love's this dream.

 

Describing amazing is as easy as describing you,

what a craving to define the truth,

I'll be falling from the blue.

 

I'm again in this lovely, but terrible dream,

the Angels' fall down to the fiends,

at the point where demons appear from the steam,

 

From the back of my mind peices fall,

rot my legs, and I began to crawl,

the devil welcomes me, welcomes all.

 

Pay this evil tow,

Hell burns the hottest at the devil's toes.

Wreckless abandoned, wreckless soul.

 

This dream never fails to catch my eye,

amused and entertained from this disaterous sight,

God turned away on this lovely night.

 

Author's Note

so couldnt really catch the last line, i just went blank, may keep it might change it not sure.

Reviews

[OT]

i really liked this! nice and dark! also the beat of the rhyme was great, it slowed in stanza 3! very nice read!! only thing i was going to point out was "demonds" to "demons" (unless you intended this for phonetic effect?) and maybe change "in" to "on" on the last line.

[Marie Harrison]

Great job!

[LeDiisco]

I love the line, "Hell burns the hottest at the devil's toes"
Poem is nicely written I think. And also, I think the last line is perfect the way it is, gives the poem a contrast of the Devil and God.

[Nicholas]

I like the contrast between hell and lovely... well done, intriguing, thought provoking... well done :D