Your Death

Another poem written for the same friend.

My painful memories,

the same day every year
it’s the day that I have now come to fear
I know that I will start to cry
anniversary of the day you died
The first one that’s not a celebration
I know anniversary’s

are meant to be happy
But just this once,

Just this time,
Memories I can’t forget,

that make me cry

Wrinkle your nose to prevent a yawn
Jump up and down to try and keep warm,
just a couple of things this anniversary date triggers
bury my head in my arms my shoulders shaking,
by this pain this days creating.
I know now I see,
not every memory can be happy,
but I also know I need,
This anniversary as much

as the ones that bring joy.
Because as much as it hurts
We need to remember
and every year I believe
your still here with me

I know a wedding or birthday anniversary
comes with presents and things.
a chance to be happy for each other
But sadness is key
to ever single memory
because it makes the happiness better
if it’s the chance to remember.
both sides of a coin, It won’t hold together ,
won’t last forever, if you can’t take the chance,
the opportunity, To remember every single anniversary
even the ones for your death

Now I hope you understand
why when I am crying so much.
Its all out of love
and not so much sadness
as ultimate gladness
for the memories of your life
Rather than the pain
Of the death
so no matter what may fall
I know this year I will be ready,
for that single day that comes,
the anniversary of your death

I know some day it will come

That I will be the only one

Who will be sitting and dreaming

Of times gone by

With tears in my eyes

But a smile on my face

Though it’s my saving grace

That this is something I have

 

Many more times will follow

With sadness and pain

This may eclipse

A pain such as this

But happiness will also come

With good times and fun

So you just have to outweigh

The good and the bad days

 

When it all seems to balance

Or the good comes out better

And the bad has faded

And the past doesn’t seem jaded

Then it will all be ok

And the time will be pain

Free one day