Darkness Or Light

Random poem I came up with

Eyes of crimson 

Wings of white 

Am I made of darkness or light?

Skies of blue

Bed of fire

What do I truely desire?

Does choas really stem and bloom 

From the same flower as order

Or do they come from different buds?

I know its wrong that I enjoy blood

But tell me is it truely a beautiful red

Or is it all in my head?

Sometimes I feel like I've lost touch

I've gone bonkers or mad

But is that truely bad?

Maybe there is still some good in me

I have love and compassion

Would you really abandon me in such a cold fashion?

Maybe I too stem from a wonderous and confusing flower

Something of both chaos and order

Or maybe I'm just carefully waiting to tip the boarder

The world may never know 

Where I truely lay my sword 

But in time we'll see....after the war

Reviews

[Carl Drake Barnard]

Wow This is such a captivating piece! Personally I think there is a thin line in our minds About what it is right and wrong,What's good and what is evil. But I know you learn from experience there are somethings in life that we seek and we want to explore. Your poem shows that, A woman struggling to find her self between what She wants and what she is destined for. But one thing is for sure The people in the war,that's by your side that looks at you in admiration you are gonna protect them for they are apart of you and therefor you are good enough for me :) Really good and provoking piece :)

[Lissianna]

Thank you ^.^ that was a lovely review

[Sir Drift & Mr. Pulse]

Wars are for soldiers and girl you are, no mention of clouds or stars, as fire is red and without a sound, the body asks but love cant be found. Very good write

[Blogger]

This is fun and easy to follow. I read it several times since it was fun and well done! Truly is misspelled.

[Moon]

This piece has a nice flow to it and is quite an enjoyable read. For some, beauty can be found in darkness.

[Caradoc]

This is an intriguing piece.

I enjoyed the rhymes and I thought you had some good word choices. You did make a few spelling mistakes but that wasn't enough to jar me from my read.

And while this piece may be about some form of angel on the surface of the write, I feel that it has a much deeper meaning. The constant queries the narrator makes are really those of a lost soul, a regular human, wondering if they are good or bad. And of course, we've been asking ourselves that question for millennia. We still don't have a definitive answer.

My thoughts are that it all boils down to choice and perception. We can choose which path to follow, but we do so based on what we perceive, on our experiences.

This is well written and thought provoking.

-Caradoc

[Dr. Wood ?]

One root......HUGE tree.......Just keep branching out......what harm can there be

intriguing poem...I loved it

[Chris]

You question well and bring your listener with you.

[Rahul]

Again you did an awesome job by dropping such sort of nice words through this piece. I again enjoyed reading the piece you made. I've to say you've a great talent to write. Everything what you write's real and of course always comes from the life of joy, life of pain, life of happiness as well as life of darkness or light and so on. I'm glad reading the piece even right now i'm feeling very honorable onself reading your nice writes. Thanks for putting your time making such a nice stuffs. I enjoyed reading this piece.

[Tardisbaby]

I enjoy the poem, though there is one spelling error (chaos not choas). I like the diction you used, as well as the metaphors. Though I think it might be more powerful if you changed up the rhyme scheme at sometime in the poem. But thats just my opinion. All and all though, I think it is magnificent!

[Tunder]

Interesting thought, it really makes one think. For one, I like the contrast of chaos being a bloom, as flowers are not chaotic. There's a lot of good metaphors in here. I like the thought of blood being something beautiful. Isn't it? It does give us life after all, but bleeding out where we can see it, it does not. The stanza, "Sometimes I feel like I've lost touch
I've gone bonkers or mad
But is that truely bad?" gives the poem a very alice in wonderland type feel, which is a good thing, I think.
I also like this poem because it shows that people are not entirely good, nor are they entirely evil (or in this case dark or light) A very dr. jekyll and mr. Hyde idea, if you will, though done in verse instead.
Overall, excellent piece :) ~Tunder~ 100/100