Heaven's On Fire

Was texting my friend and his signature gave me a really good idea. I'm not really religious but I kind of felt like God was giving up on me.

Heaven's on fire,

The world is crumbling down.

Heaven's on fire,

The devil wears the crown.

Heaven's on fire,

Hell if full of ice.

Heaven's on fire,

Tomorrow may never come.

Heaven's on fire,

It races through my heart.

Heaven's on fire,

God hasn't done his part.

Author's Note

Let me know what can be fixed and your opinions!!

Reviews

[WayOath]

Nice. Heaven's on Fire just so happens to be a KISS song. Lol, except its about sex..."Feel my heat, taking you higher, burn with me, heaven's on fire...bathe the sky with desire....blah blah blah." Very weird that I stumbled upon this. But the perspective is nice and the phrases you used are bold. There is a strong sense of betrayl.

[marisa starkilicious]

Oh, very nice. I like the repitition. I also like the first lines. Especially "The devil wears the crown." And I the last line is especially done well. Good job. :)

[Hailey]

i like it, the flow was kind of choppy but that actually added to the appeal of the poem, the repetition was pulled off quite nicely. the only thing about this that bothers me is the rhyme scheme. the first and last stanza rhyme, while the middle one doesnt. thats just something u might wanna avoid. other than that, it was a really fantastic poem, great job

[Taylor H.]

I'm making up for reviews I haven't returned. So you may get a few from me depending :). OK, I thought this was a good poem but the line about tomorrow may never come, didn't rhyme and it kind of through off the beat. Great poem though

[Dupree]

This could be your strongest work but you need to make the ending as strong as the beginning. Fix that and this piece will be even more well loved. Other than that I see nothing else that's flawed. You have a good form and ryhme just try to make it stronger

[Miss Coral]

Good piece, but the end was a bit weak. You started out very strong, great rhythm, great rhyme, but then it slowly degenerated. If you worked on it a bit more, I think this could be excellent.