Sleep

The thunder rolls and lightning cracks across the sky, the shadows of trees outside the window falling across the wall. She stares at the falling rain from the windowsill, the sweatshirt pulled down past her fingertips and the blanket wrapped around her body. Thunder shakes the cold house.
  She continues to see the faces, the bodies; even though they weren't actually there, she saw them everywhere. She knows they aren't real, but she's already been out twice to try and save the mangled, shadowed bodies. His hand touches her shoulder, she jumps slightly but doesn't turn around, her gaze still held outside the window.
  "Come back to bed, please" he mumbles, his eyebrows creased. The lightning flashes quickly and he catches her face: one eyebrow lifted, her green eyes reflecting the scene, but all else was blank, pale. "Hey, you know they aren't real." He tries to pull her away, but she stops him.
  "They were once." She whispers, barely audible, almost lost under the thunder, but he's used to it.
   Lighting flashes and she closes her eyes, seeing another face, one that has always stung the inside of her eyelids. A long scar down his face, from his eyebrow to the tip of his chin; cut by his shrapnel, his face bleeds and drips down to his neck, scarred and bruised black and blue; his hands are cracked from work and his forearm slit horizontally from society; legs are bloody and mangled; she can't bear the sight of her brother anymore. This is why she doesn't sleep, she doesn't close her eyes because all she sees is them; and she blames herself.
  Lightning flashes: bodies crawling toward her from the forest, she runs away in horror. She remembers how she ran: the rain cutting across her face, the heavy footsteps behind her as they tried to catch her, she ran to him but he still cannot save her.
  Her face contorts. She's stuck in the memory again.
  He pulls her from the window, into his arms and carries her to the bed, her laying over him, as he tells her stories of their memories and what's going to happen, stories of what it was like before The Killing, stories of his childhood; all stories until she is asleep, trembling and fidgeting when the thunder shakes the house, but she is deep asleep, in a place where they can not trap her as easily. He stays awake, now racked with the worry of her safety.
  The thunder rolls and the lighting cracks.

Author's Note

I wrote this during a huge thunderstorm at about 2AM... So excuse the mistakes because I haven't actually looked it over real closely yet. It doesn't really make very much sense but I needed to post something. Bear with me, football season is almost over so I'll have a least sometime to catch my breath and hopefully try and write some! Thank you so much for reading.

Reviews

[Craig2591]

You're right. It doesn't make a lot of sense, but it doesn't have to. I like it. There's a lot of unanswered questions. I love that kind of mystery. It really sets a mood. And I like how he finally gets her to fall asleep and then he can't sleep. Ironic.

You changed tense a few times. Otherwise good job. I'm glad to see you posting again.

[K.]

Thank you! A lot of my stuff lately hasn't made much sense (what does that mean??), but I guess it kind of works out! And I'll check out the tense stuff and change it. Thanks for reading and reviewing.

[zainul]

Thanks to the thunderstorm for allowing you to write this piece.

[K.]

Thank you so much for reading. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[zainul]

You are most welcome Kassie for the nice creative write.

[Wolfwind]

While I'll agree with the places of changing tense. For the most part, you got the seed for something interesting for sure. I got the feeling as if this girl was an empath of some sort and could in some fashion see and sense the unsettle spirits from some tragedy long ago, or perhaps a tragedy that she was apart of. The male's character came across as just a place holder for me. He didn't have much description and his character was that developed.
There were a few places that stood out as important to the main character, thought I don't know why. One of them was when she spoke of her brother. That leds the mind to wonder and wander, just what might have happened. The next was the comment about his arms slit from society... That has a powerful seed in itself that could blossom something more.

Overall, I think it's a great peice in the way of description and visual clarity when it comes to the dead people and the feeling of fear from the storms and what the main character is seeing. It would be a great piece to expand on and see where it might go. =)

Thanks for sharing Kassie. Glad you found a moment to scribble something down.

Aaron - Wolfwind

[K.]

I was kind of just writing what came straight from my mind at that point, but now that you bring that across, I see it as somewhat of a portrayal of the "I see dead people" thing that everyone jokes about but I hope that I made it come across in a way that wasn't so obvious and joking. My favorite part is probably the "arms slit from society" part, as well. I think I left it vague enough to where I could expand if I wanted to, so maybe you'll see a little more of this story! Thank you so much for taking the time to read and share your thoughts, I really appreciate it.